Some people are raised to put more emphasis on sex than others, or are told that it hurts terribly. It is not far beyond the scope of imagination to think that she might have been raised to believe such things. If I were you, Op, I would talk to her about it. Tell her you want to bond with her in a new way. Then tell her you will go to therapy and help her overcome it if she wants to. If she does not want to get over it or even try, then maybe it is time for you to move on since you don't seem to want to wait to have sex. Just be nice about it.

If it's an actual phobia she will probably scream in terror and run away if you try anything.

I'm incredibly interested to know if you are a man or a woman. Extremely attractive either way, so please do not take offense.

She must have some fun nightmares

wow man i feel bad for you :( but im in the same shit :/

Oh no now you can't take away her virginity. Ahh. Your life sucks.

Rape?

You sure she doesn't also have a sword to sword fight with you?...if you catch my drift?

1. He's not putting it here as a life ending problem. Most FMLs are way more trivial things than this. 2. If he's at puberty, that is a serious problem for a guy. Feelings =/= hormones and instincts. It's not because he loves a girl that doesn't want sex at the moment that he can just stop his body from wanting sex. He can put up with it if the rest of the relationship is good enough, but it will still suck for him. Loving one's family won't stop them from feeling bad about certain parts of their relationship and expressing that feeling. It's the same. 3. The girl should have told him that earlier. It's okay if she can't have sex for one reason or another, but she should have told the guy before entering such a relationship. Saying it only afterwards is like she was thinking "now I already got him, so now I can say it and he'll have to put up with it quietly or he'll just be called a disgusting pig for caring about sex" - and that's exactly what is happening here too. He has a right to be disappointed too if he was caught by surprise.

Objection! Your point is incoherent and irrelevant. I can't imagine why you think more people should have a phobia like this. It wouldn't simply disappear upon marriage. You think waiting until marriage is a good idea? Good for you, and good luck as well, but the OP's situation is barely related. Take your cant elsewhere. Also, I might be more inclined to take you seriously if you had a basic understanding of the keyboard's many functions. They aren't limited to an ellipsis.