Health, Poopoo peepee, Food and Awkward: You OK, hun? - FML

You OK, hun?

By llaurenmariee - 22/03/2012 08:00 - United States

Today, I was pooping at a local Target when I heard someone say, "You need to eat more solids, you're pooping like a rabbit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 433

You deserved it 4 239

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Same thing different taste

Bathroom menace

By Shelly - 07/06/2009 02:25 - United States

Today, I used the restroom at a department store. While I was in my stall, I overheard a little girl say to her mother, "I see someone wearing pink!" I remembered that I was wearing pink just as she finished her thought, "…and she's pooping." She was peeking at me through the stall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 242

You deserved it 3 453

By Anonymous - 20/11/2009 15:35 - United States

Today, I was walking around in Target with my friends and the guy I've liked for a long time. As we approached the patio section, I sat down on a chair only to hear a big wet watery sound. I got up and realized that I had just sat in some little kid's diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 979

You deserved it 7 626

By NoPrivacy - 26/04/2012 10:44 - United States

Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 173

You deserved it 34 734

"Pooping and Shit"

By everybodypoops - 02/08/2017 20:00

Today, while at a rest stop, I heard a woman in the stall next to me answer her phone and say to the other person, "Oh nothing just pooping and shit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 881

You deserved it 546

Chub rub

By Anonymous - 19/03/2021 13:59 - United States - Malvern

Today, I was pooping in a public toilet and a kid had walked in on me. I then heard him tell his dad, "It's okay, I didn't see anything, he was fat so his chubby legs hid it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 190

Amplified

By Anonymous - 01/09/2010 23:04 - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 585

You deserved it 4 373

By MisterBrown - 15/02/2010 07:08 - United States

Today, while at a family get together, my bowels suddenly decided they needed to be emptied. Straight away. I felt bad enough using someone else's bathroom for this, but later, my sister came in and loudly said "God, Brian, what the hell have you been eating?" in front of everyone at the get together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 772

You deserved it 3 361

Kids Say the Darndest Things

By Lolabunny - 21/08/2018 04:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, I went grocery shopping with my 4-year-old after having some major bathroom issues. As I walked over to get bananas, she yelled out in the middle of the produce section, "DO YOU STILL HAVE DIARRHEA MOMMY?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 828

You deserved it 354

Concentrate

By um…ew - 14/01/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, my friend and I were having a conversation in the ladies’ room. Suddenly, we hear banging from one of the stalls and, “Can you talk somewhere else? Some of us are trying to poop.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 921

By ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 765

You deserved it 40 919

Next

Top comments

cryskuni 5

Saturday 4 August 2012 19:27

I have always wondered how people can poop in public, because I have the fear someone will hear and make a comment like that.

glittertwat 10

Saturday 4 August 2012 19:26

You should take their advice.

Comments

graffitied_love 20

Saturday 4 August 2012 19:40

What does the person get out of making such a comment? Are they hoping to start a conversation?

OhDearBetrayal 25

Saturday 4 August 2012 19:49

What's wrong with just trying to be a friendly stranger giving advice?

MuseFan1991 14

Saturday 4 August 2012 21:42

24- nothing. except when you're on the loo

birdcagereligion 10

Saturday 4 August 2012 19:41

That's a very strange comparison.

emeraldisle 30

Saturday 4 August 2012 19:46

That's why I try not to use the loo in public if someone else is in there.

obsydian_fml 3

Saturday 4 August 2012 19:55

Put a few strips of toilet paper in the water first, it will lessen the sounds of your poops to avoid things like this. Now if the other person has their ear against the stall wall on the other hand...

compasseagle89 8

Sunday 5 August 2012 1:18

I drop a couple pieces of TP in to prevent splash back. Worst feeling ever.

Spark_Slicker 19

Saturday 4 August 2012 20:03

Unless you need toilet paper or something, talking to anyone in another stall while you're in one is freaking bizarre. Especially if they are commenting about how they were listening to you poop.

brutaltruth 3

Saturday 4 August 2012 20:16

You should save that "shit" for home.

unknown_user5566 26

Saturday 4 August 2012 20:18

I can't stand when people talk to me in public restrooms. I think it's one of the most awkward things you can do. The women at my work don't seem to know how incredibly awkward it is. They try to talk to me, each other, and a bunch of them talk on their cell phones. I don't get it!

Bpwoods 6

Saturday 4 August 2012 20:58

That reminds me of an FML where someone was talking on the phone and the op of the FML thought the person was talking to them, and replied to all their questions

jaggerbaby4726 1

Saturday 4 August 2012 22:04

Haha I remember that. FTL lol!

joshszz_fml 4

Saturday 4 August 2012 20:20

Was that Target near a hospital called Princeton-Plainsboro?

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Saturday 4 August 2012 20:23

"You show that BM who's boss." Yeah baby, yeah!

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Saturday 4 August 2012 20:26

This is why I hate public restrooms. TOO. PUBLIC.

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, my long distance girlfriend of almost two years broke up with me because I didn't like her drinking and driving. Her reasoning was, "I don't go out that often so what's the problem?" or "I'm safe when I drive drunk." Yeah? How many drunk drivers thought the same then wrapped their car around a tree? FML

I agree, your life sucks 478

You deserved it 92

Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 365

You deserved it 5 630

The Top

Today, I was talking to a guy I liked. He was dumped so he was ranting about how there's no good girls left. I mustered up some courage and told him I was a good girl and that I would treat him right, at which point he pretended to have an emergency phone call and abruptly left. He talked to his lock screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 598

You deserved it 250

Today, I saw a pair of eyes looking at me from my closet. Realizing it must be my cat, I called her. She immediately came out from under my bed. I can't find anything in my closet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 734

You deserved it 5 109

Today, my neighbor showed me footage of my 7-year-old son spraying his beloved rose garden with weed killer. The whole garden is dead as fuck, and I'm now being taken to small claims court. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 870

You deserved it 7 726

Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "Hell". FML

I agree, your life sucks 211 178

You deserved it 35 023

Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 486

You deserved it 3 882

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees". For some reason, everybody pronounces it "your anus". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 183

You deserved it 5 886