Miscellaneous: Today, I accidentally texted the girl I like, "Oh god, I just...

By Boneo and Juliet - 16/07/2015 19:22 - United States - Amherst

Today, I accidentally texted the girl I like, "Oh god, I just choked on a boner." I meant bone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 841

You deserved it 5 013

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Same thing different taste

Nice try

By Proof-Reader - 15/12/2009 08:32 - United States

Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 418

You deserved it 31 993

By in big trouble - 23/08/2014 12:28 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 394

You deserved it 25 976

By kingmetal42 - 09/02/2010 19:10 - France

Today, I texted my girlfriend that I'm going to 'lick my professor's ass' instead of 'kick' due to auto-correction on my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 981

You deserved it 27 874

By Anonymous - 11/03/2017 12:00

Today, after a brief FaceTime session, I accidentally texted my father what was meant for my boyfriend. I had to downplay it, but it still made me want to crawl 50 ft below the earth and stay there a few days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 607

You deserved it 1 326

I'm a weirdoooooo

By Anonymous - 18/07/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I sent a text to the girl I like, asking if she wanted to "hang out." Autocorrect changed it to "hand out," and she responded by asking what I was handing out. I panicked and replied, "My love." Now she thinks I'm a weirdo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 502

By tinypenis - 04/06/2013 12:15 - United States - Jamaica

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 821

You deserved it 71 871

Freudian slip

By Anonymous - 24/02/2023 14:00

Today, I accidentally sent a text message meant for my best friend to my boss. The text was about how much I hated my job and my boss's constant micromanagement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 1 056

Been there, done that

By randomgirl - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 365

You deserved it 15 028

Just a prank, again

By momaaa1342 - 21/10/2013 03:51 - United States - Elmwood

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 723

You deserved it 3 605

By drpepperking10 - 02/07/2016 23:27 - United States

Today, I was kissing my crush for the first time and her tooth fell out into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 361

You deserved it 3 264

BlackFames 16

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Stick with your story, man. That's what I always do.

hotheadslav 17

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Just text her back and say you meant bone. I'm sure she'll understand it was a mistake and maybe you guys can laugh about it!

Comments

parrchristianna 14

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

wow embarrassing!

interesting33 36

Friday 17 July 2015 0:45

Eh it doesn't have to be, depends on the relationship and how you handle it - just explain it was your phone and laugh about it :)

tranced_ 45

Friday 17 July 2015 1:55

that's just a pro boner case. .

Angelrose2004 17

Friday 17 July 2015 2:53

Stupid autocorrect screws us all over. What a witch!

ChristianH39 30

Friday 17 July 2015 8:07

Hope she has a sense of humor!

BlackFames 16

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Stick with your story, man. That's what I always do.

NotGabe 28

Friday 17 July 2015 1:41

Quick, OP needs to find a boner to choke on! Any takers?

DoomSkuller 28

Friday 17 July 2015 5:45

I volunteer!

Wakachulak 22

Friday 17 July 2015 6:40

That could work for him, girls like bisexual men.

alexanderavatar 24

Friday 17 July 2015 16:58

even if he properly spelt bone i dont think she would give a shit

docphilsman 15

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

I guess you could say you're boned

Zgamerz 11

Friday 17 July 2015 4:32

Congratulations, you're now, "that guy"

docphilsman 15

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:08

I don't mind. anything for the pun

Zwerik 31

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Hopefully she doesn't think you're just some dick...

MrSassypants 33

Friday 17 July 2015 1:09

Yeah, instead she thinks he was just getting some dick.

hotheadslav 17

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Just text her back and say you meant bone. I'm sure she'll understand it was a mistake and maybe you guys can laugh about it!

dyne808 34

Saturday 18 July 2015 20:31

yeah, i cant really see how this is an fml... wouldnt it just be a "lol autocorrect" moment then the convo moves on?

Dean__Winchester 16

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Bone Appétit!

feytensn 25

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

If she thought it was funny, marry her!

myGRAM 14

Friday 17 July 2015 3:02

Great criteria for making a life long commitment

feytensn 25

Saturday 18 July 2015 18:26

No but humor is!

Yazoo77 16

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Boneo and Julliet ? perfect.

ahippienamedrae 10

Friday 17 July 2015 5:51

oh nomeo

Jashie 18

Saturday 18 July 2015 2:21

Why is this down voted

sorenipples 9

Friday 17 July 2015 0:36

Proofread your text messages. Always.

MagnusDeus 24

Friday 17 July 2015 0:40

If I were her, I would reply, "oh my god me too!"

Keywords

Money Christmas Gifts Lonely Relatable Health Family Awkward Miscellaneous Technology Social Media Holidays Narcissistic parents Love Drunk Dogs Animals Annoying Poopoo peepee My ex Work Religion AITA Shopping Am I overreacting? Break-ups Intimacy Cheating Furniture Delivery

The Top

Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished, I jokingly said, "Who's going to sleep in the wet patch?" He got up and said, "You're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing." It was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 582

You deserved it 4 531

Today, at a supermarket, I ran into a girl I knew in high school. She had two kids with her and they were buying school supplies. My cart was full of beer and snacks. After a chat, she left, not before saying, "I hope things get better for you." I have a job and a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 670

You deserved it 266

The Top

Today, I walked to my local McDonald's. I spent the last 7 dollars I had on my meal. As I began to walk back to my dorm, I was mugged. I explained to them I had no money, so they stole my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 145

You deserved it 3 732

Today, the medicine I keep at my desk for headaches is now gone thanks to my coworker who took the last 6 Advil at once. Her reasoning? "You're thin, so you wouldn't need them anyway. I'm twice your size, so I needed twice the dose." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 91

Today, I left 20 minutes early for school to get a good seat in class. I sat in traffic for 20 minutes before I even got on the thruway and for another 25 minutes once I got off the exit for school. Then I couldn't find parking at my university. I missed class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 941

You deserved it 806

Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around because I'm "squishy and smell like fried chicken all the time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 471

You deserved it 25 610

Today, I told my girlfriend that for whatever reason I find it really difficult to orgasm stood up in the shower, she immediately demanded sex in the shower on the basis that without my orgasm maybe I’ll finally last long enough for her to orgasm first, or even at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 2 133

Today, I got sick at school. When someone called my mom for permission for me to leave, she told them she doesn't have a daughter and to never call that number again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 393

You deserved it 2 777

Same thing different taste

Nice try

I'm a weirdoooooo

Freudian slip

Been there, done that

Just a prank, again

Top comments

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