By Anonymous - 15/05/2017 02:00
The Top
By Squeepy - 10/04/2016 03:45 - United States - Flat Rock
Squeepy tells us more.
By AwkCockBlock - 07/03/2016 00:17 - Canada - Nanaimo
AwkCockBlock tells us more.
OP talkin here bb's. Short version of story: Super early in the morning, after a night of partying, I offered a couple people the option to crash at my place (as they lived a ways away, it was pouring rain, no transportation etc.) YES they knew I was in the bed, thought they were being sneaky. I was awoken from bed movement. To people saying I should have said / done something..I did..hence the username.
By Anonymous - 14/08/2017 13:00
By notsoproudfather - 01/02/2016 15:54 - India - Pune
By VisceralWolf - 26/01/2016 06:35 - United States - Fairborn
VisceralWolf tells us more.
OP here, I made an account just to respond. To explain, my girlfriend is very rarely on top, and she was in the kind of pain wanting 'mood' that she didn't notice the contact and I certainly wasn't aware of it. I already knew that she said this could happen and avoided it at all costs. Well, turns out the angle and her weight pushing down caused us to reach the limit and well... I was on the bottom. Simple as that. I in no way did this on purpose. She knows it too.
Customers from hell
By midnightblade163 - 13/01/2016 12:06 - Australia - Caringbah
By sammylynnp - 07/01/2016 05:39 - United States - Kenosha
sammylynnp tells us more.
OP here: Yes he was breastfed for about 5 months. Due to unfortunate medical problems, we had to switch completely to formula. His brother, however, is currently breastfeeding. At 4 years old, he has lots of questions and I try to answer them all as honestly as I can. I in NOW WAY judge people about formula feeding. As long as the baby is happy and healthy, do what you do, which I've also tried to teach him.
Asshats everywhere
By Anonymous - 08/12/2017 15:00
Front line workers
By Anonymous - 05/12/2015 03:43 - Canada - Toronto
By Nojob - 06/06/2018 09:00 - United States - Bronx
By Anonymous - 10/06/2018 01:30
Captain Hook
By Kortnie Peterman - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff
By kill the audience - 10/11/2016 17:51 - United States - Lewes
RIP
By MrsFart - 18/08/2018 01:30
Running on empty
By Dehydrated - 01/09/2015 11:07 - United States - Charlotte
By Anonymous - 29/08/2015 08:50 - United Kingdom - London
By karmaiguess - 18/10/2018 03:00
By anonymous - 11/11/2018 13:30
Out of it
By damn you Ambien - 03/08/2016 05:48 - United States - Los Angeles
By Anonymous - 09/07/2016 15:14
Book smarts
By Anonymous - 05/07/2016 16:19 - United States - South Sioux City
Terms and conditions
By albinoalligator - 04/07/2016 00:48 - United States - Elkton
Poetry in politics
By blondie101 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States
By Humpday - 29/05/2016 21:36 - United States
By Anonymous - 30/04/2016 06:20 - Australia
By Yippie - 02/05/2017 22:00 - Spain - Alcal? De Guadaira
By Ifuckdup - 25/05/2017 00:00
Eat the rich
By dysfunctional_ravenclaw - 01/06/2017 15:00 - United States - Houston
By NordicNathan - 14/03/2016 04:49 - Canada - Burlington
NordicNathan tells us more.
Hey, I'm the author of the FML. So to clarify I just turned 16, she just turned 17 and is in the 12th grade. I've had my doubts about our relationship for a while because of how incompatible we are as people, but her talking about what she wants to name our kids and how cute they will be was kind of the last straw for me. She said "I love you" after our second time seeing each other and after she had already cheated on me, so I definitely hear all the comments about telling her my concerns and/or breaking up with her. But she cries at the drop of a hat and is what I would consider emotionally unstable, this is also the reason I didn't break up with her after she cheated on me. I wasn't raised to make people cry so I tried to be understanding in the situation. She is so bad that she is still crying about her previous boyfriend while telling me that I'm the best boyfriend ever. So I don't know how to break it to her without crushing her. Any ideas?
Keywords
Hey guys, OP here! :) So, good news everyone! I'm not dead (yet). Though I almost died laughing at these comments, thanks for making my day! :D I do believe that there is a logical explanation for this odd occurrence. We do have a communal laundry room in my apartment, as many of you have suggested. The strange thing is, we live in a building that only has 8 apartments, and none of us have babies or young children. And I was not doing laundry that day at all, nor do I recall seeing the sock before we left, which was in a very noticeable spot on the floor. I saw it immediately upon our return. Soooooooo ghosts. It's definitely ghosts. *DUN DUN DUUUUUUN* The plot thickens.