Backhanded
By Anonymous - 02/07/2012 05:47 - United States - Gainesville
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Don't worry. She may have thought her son was too stupid to marry someone with more than 2 brain cells...
You're not by default ugly just because you're not a model, and intellect and social skills beat beauty, which will fade eventually anyways.
On a completely unrelated note; you look like Justin Bieber if she was male and Scandinavian.
Wait, what? You're insulted your MIL thinks you're intelligent, just because you've interpreted her compliment to mean she thinks you aren't beautiful? She didn't even comment on your looks! She simply said her son dated cheerleader and model types previously, which to her may have meant the types of careers and interests they have, and nothing to do with their looks or yours. Honestly, I interpreted her comment as more insulting to cheerleader/model types, since she seems to be implying that all her son's exes were vapid, whereas you (supposedly) have more brains and substance. Even if she was rude, are you really so shallow you're irritated someone called you smart rather than pretty? If so, you deserve it entirely.
I don't know...the stereotype of models and cheerleaders is that they are usually very attractive. So imo (though I'm only judging by the way the FML is worded) it's pretty obvious that the mother in law thinks her son's wife isn't as good looking as those previous girlfriends. Generally if someone says you aren't a "model type" or a "cheerleader" type, they mean you aren't all that attractive.
Whats with all the closeminded unrealistic stereotypes..!? Theres plenty of ugly cheerleaders out there as well as "unique" looking models that arent traditionally beautiful. Beauty is one of those ever changing social constructions with many deciding factors, namely time, location, culture etc etc .."beautiful" girls can have ugly days or ugly periods of life, they can also be smart.. we'rjust as smart girls can blossom, become dumber, have dumb moments or
Agreed with Evie. MIL was trying to be nice. OP was being oversensitive. 63: No, I wouldn't. But I don't have esteem issues.
Stoopid touch screen... accidently pressed send before I was done typing! without re-typing the same thing over again what I was going to continue to say was: Its not as if we're coded with one or the other! ..the smart "awkward looking" girls at the front of the class can blossom into beauties, or become less intelligent, they can have dumb moments or simply not have a level of intelligence that meets every criteria needed to be a mensa candidate.. again intelligence is also something that can be socially constructed. We're all beautiful, ugly, smart and dumb in our owns ways!! ..n who bloody cares.. Just saying, Rant over.. :S
My MIL says plenty of dumb things to me, many of which could be interpreted as offensive. They aren't though, she just doesn't think. Like when my husband moved in with me she later commented how surprised she was it worked out as she had assumed he'd be back within a week! But she didn't mean it to be nasty and it would never occur to her that it sounded rude. Our relationship is better because I don't assume the defensive position automatically. That's my suggestion for OP too, because there's really nothing in the post to indicate her MIL meant to be cruel. In my experience, when a boy's mother wants to be a bitch to you, she doesn't follow it up by calling you smart. Or care if your feelings are hurt enough to clarify she meant something else.
Just be queit please.
Um we can all stop hating on the poor girl her mother in law most likely did call her ugly and us girls are always worried about our body don't be a bitch!!!
Is this honestly the only thing you have to complain about?
In 10 years you'll still be intelligent. In 10 years the cheerleaders will have lost their looks, but they'll still be dumb.
Cliches are everywhere. Mean step mother? Personality over looks? All true but still cliches
That's her mother-in-law.
Can't have everything in life - don't have the looks, have the brains - I see that as a decent compromise. Think about those who don't have the looks or the brain, and have a fat arse too!
Some people actually like fat arses
Take it as a compliment. I'm sure you are pretty and what she meant was he usually dates empty headed blondes
Keywords
Intelligence and personality are better than looks any day.
Why do looks matter? As long as your both happy, that's what's important :).