Transportation, Thief, Ironic and Periods: Cockwomble strikes again

Cockwomble strikes again

By haveahappyperiod - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff

Today, my purse was stolen from my bag while I was on the train. The thief will be surprised to find that it wasn't my money purse, but in fact my "period purse". Hope they find tampons useful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 567

You deserved it 4 812

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Same thing different taste

Acting kinda sus

By sailinggsoul - 02/08/2019 00:01

Today, I bought a box of tampons and went to the store restroom to insert one. I then put the box inside my purse. On my way out, I got stopped by security, who yelled at me to empty my purse. He grabbed my bag, spilling the tampons everywhere. Apparently, he thought I was stealing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 941

You deserved it 173

By BroadcitySF - 28/02/2016 03:42 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was mugged while changing my tampon. The mugger took everything, including the fresh tampon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 565

You deserved it 1 634

By Anonymous - 22/09/2011 13:55 - Australia

Today, I was expecting my period. To avoid the embarrassment of everyone in the office finding out, instead of putting tampons in my bag, I hid one in my bra. It fell out while I was coming back from lunch. I am now known to all as "The Tampon Dispenser". FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 946

You deserved it 34 030

By xobeachbabi428ox - 18/07/2009 22:32 - United States

Today, I used a public bathroom. I hung my purse up on the hook on the door. Two minutes later, a hand reaches over the door and steals my purse. I got robbed while taking a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 198

You deserved it 7 979

By UnluckyTeen - 22/10/2009 11:29 - Singapore

Today, I went to retrieve my stolen wallet from a train station. After I collected it, I returned to the place where I'd parked my bike, only to find that my bike had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 867

You deserved it 3 412

By unluckysamaritan - 15/10/2016 08:51 - Sweden

Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on the subway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 492

You deserved it 983

It wasn't me

By Shopgirl - 06/08/2009 13:14 - Australia

Today, I found a wallet on the train. I called the owner, who said he would come around and pick it up. When he finally did, he looked inside and screamed that his money was missing, and that I was a dirty thief. I never took a cent. He's filing theft charges against me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 435

You deserved it 4 441

By Anonymous - 09/02/2012 21:42 - United States

Today, while sitting on the toilet, I noticed there was no toilet paper left, so I dug through my purse to use my one and only pad as a substitute. It clogged the toilet, and I started my period ten minutes later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 19 889

By NoMoney4Me - 24/09/2012 10:48 - United States - York

Today, I went for a job interview. Before giving me a tour, the manager pointed to my purse and said, "Better leave that in my office." I didn't know why it was safer in her office than on my shoulder, but I complied. Later, I went to buy coffee and discovered that all my cash was missing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 798

You deserved it 3 981

By mugged - 15/12/2010 11:58 - Germany

Today, I went to the Salvation Army to donate some clothes. As I was handing over the 4 huge bags that I had carried for 10 blocks, while 6 months pregnant, somebody stole my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 039

You deserved it 3 748

Murilirum 23

Friday 4 October 2013 16:18

Ah bloody hell!

MirandaShaee 6

Friday 4 October 2013 16:18

Tricked ya!

Comments

imbedderdenu 23

Friday 4 October 2013 22:21

lmao GOOD! Hope you have something to tide you over!

saidoh_fml 26

Friday 4 October 2013 23:09

Good fml, but it would be way better if it was written by the thief.

ruckfules85 34

Saturday 5 October 2013 0:20

Lol it's really jokes on you if that's what he was Lookin for. Doubt it tho. FHL

kingvssj0 9

Saturday 5 October 2013 0:40

20 min later a post says I stole a purse was filled with used tampons FML

dennisk21 6

Saturday 5 October 2013 0:50

why is that a bad thing? at least he didn't get money

rwil90 8

Saturday 5 October 2013 1:10

What a bloody C***

uglyluckgirl 8

Saturday 5 October 2013 1:10

I hope you weren't on your period at that time

hurley12 30

Saturday 5 October 2013 1:19

Sounds like luck not an FML

homes7d 14

Saturday 5 October 2013 1:36

This is not a FML it's a win

taziiscool 5

Saturday 5 October 2013 1:58

This isn't really much of an FML, but hey it still made me laugh! =)

Keywords

Love Surprise Cute Awkward My ex Texting Intimacy Sex Wanker Mental health Health Insomnia Sleep Food Cooking Kids Weekend Parents Pranks Annoying Miscellaneous Work Embarrassing Technology Coworkers Zoom Argument Roommate Pizza Animals

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If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 11

Today, I found out that in the past, my mother has paid or outright threatened my girlfriends into breaking up with me, because they were, "unsuitable trash not fit to be the mothers of my future grand babies." This explains why I’m 47 and have never married or had children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 606

You deserved it 163

The Top

Are your friends as great as these? In honor of this special day, maybe DON'T make up an excuse not to hang out with your friends. They're not soooo bad...

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 153

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 602

You deserved it 3 695

Today, I found out the girl I’ve been seeing for a few weeks is freaky. At her grandad's funeral, she got so upset she had to leave the room, only to drag me into the priest's office for a quick blowjob. Apparently, death turns her on. I had oral sex at a funeral. I’m going to Hell for sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 266

You deserved it 575

Today, my fiancé and I moved into a new home a few houses away from our previous one. We were excited about not hearing our roommate's dog howling non-stop anymore. We can hear him from the new house. Very clearly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 951

You deserved it 1 941

Today, I realized my mom cares more about Kurt's bullying problem on Glee than she does for mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 034

You deserved it 4 131

Today, I woke up at 4 a.m. to study and do homework, then worked for 8 hours, then went to the gym, and finally went home to study even more. Then I realized I'll never make as much money or be as cool as a YouTube celebrity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 303

Cockwomble strikes again

Same thing different taste

Acting kinda sus

It wasn't me

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