Dumbass
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....& you had a baby w/ that guy?! Goddamn you musta been soooooooo fn hammered & horny that night!!! I just don't understand what people have against condoms :/
It could be OP's husband. You take things too literaly.
I have no idea how your comment hasn't been thumbed down more.. first off,condoms break as previously mentioned, secondly,not everyone is able to base their relationship choices on something which happens in the future.. and lastly,this man could be an intelligent man,had no other options and improvised so he didn't have to leave a big mess,which i would've thought would be more likely to leave him without a job..
I'm sorry that you had a child with him =/ Perhaps he's not that stupid with everything he does? I'm hoping that's the case since you decided to be pregnant by him.
Accidents do happen. Maybe it wasn't something they chose.
I see your point in this FML.
Very smooth move. I doubt I could ever come up with a method of cleaning as marvelous as using painter's tape on a carpet!
He wasn't laid off, he was fired. The euphemism doesn't apply when you lose your job for being incompetent and making stupid choices. FYL. Not for your husband losing his job but for being married to an idiot. I suppose that YDI though. You had to know he was an idiot before marrying him. If you didn't know then YDI for marrying someone you didn't really know. So accept your fate and learn to deal with disappointment, because you're bound to experience lots of it!
You act like if someone's future is set in stone. People just love being around you.
41 - Nowhere in this FML does it say that OP's married to this man.
That is actually a smart idea.... I mean if your in a pinch and don't have a vacuum
Tell him to apply for a job in a waxing parlour.
Maybe you should pack him a lunch so he doesn't have to eat paint chips all day long. But I have to give him credit, at least he tried, most guys would have just walked away.
He gets points for trying. Anytime my husband has been laid off I greeted by a mess and "I am hunger what's for supper". When I get home from work.
*hungry
This happens regularly enough that you picked up on a pattern? Great husband...
Laid off? He should be in management. That is clearly thinking outside of the box. Although, you must be management grade as well, not clearly defining him as your boyfriend, but the father of your (bastard) child.
Personally i'm assuming she describes him as the father of her child for one of two reasons. 1. FMLs have a limited space and putting 'my boyfriend/husband and father of my child' does not flow well (the main FML point being her child has these genes, not that she goes out with an idiot) or 2. They're not together, so she is fully entitled to describe him as 'the father of my child' without further specification of how that came about.
Keywords
The intelligence is strong with this one. He improvised, give him some credit there.
Smartest man ever