Love, Roommate, Awkward and Intimacy: Embarrassing little secret - FML

Embarrassing little secret

By FML - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend forced me to climb out through his window, because he was too embarrassed at the thought of his roommate finding out I'd spent the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 487

You deserved it 5 679

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Top comments

mrsabed 0

Sunday 11 December 2011 2:54

and you did it?

Outsider_77 0

Sunday 11 December 2011 2:56

If I were you, I'd find someone that can appreciate you

Comments

PoisonGirlInc 0

Sunday 11 December 2011 19:45

And he's still your boyfriend why?

Shmace 4

Sunday 11 December 2011 21:04

... Not your boyfriend. Just saying.

bannedforlife 0

Sunday 11 December 2011 21:17

Ex boyfriend by now I hope.

bannedforlife 0

Sunday 11 December 2011 21:23

Hey, ********, stfu. And save your pseudo-witty bullshit about how I must because fat girl for someone who gives a shit. Why don't you step off a tall building into rush hour traffic and put and end to your useless existence.

nyperez87 1

Sunday 11 December 2011 22:57

You must be some ugly bitch or you must mean something to the roommate

rastafarhi 0

Monday 12 December 2011 0:21

Your bf Is a pussy. lol

Rachel1987 4

Monday 12 December 2011 0:41

Maybe you aren't his only girlfriend. Think.

late_415 0

Monday 12 December 2011 3:27

You must be Ugly as F***

evebright 5

Monday 12 December 2011 15:08

....for the last time. There, I finished your post for you.

Ugi 26

Monday 12 December 2011 17:33

Your _boyfriend_ did this? That's horrible. Time to find a decent guy.

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Keywords

Gross Animals Cats Poopoo peepee Awkward Smells Love Miscellaneous Embarrassing Health Painful First Dates Christmas Work Social Media Music Grieving Anniversary Boredom Abuse Ironic Intimacy Alcohol Drunk Transportation AITA Am I overreacting? Parents Gun control Kids

The Top

Today, my grad student husband was unusually frisky in the middle of the day. I took the opportunity and we had an enjoyable afternoon romp. Afterward, I asked him what had gotten him in such a good mood. He replied, "I'd do just about anything to get out of doing my homework." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 405

You deserved it 4 186

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 595

You deserved it 3 438

The Top

Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad, so I speeded up to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 528

You deserved it 12 877

Today, I ran into my husband and his mistress. He was picking her up at the airport. I was catching a flight to a conference with my boss. He had flowers for her, and his arm around her. My boss knows my husband as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 119

Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 065

You deserved it 50 986

Today, I got a two dollar raise. Unfortunately, I recently accepted a transfer to a job on the other side of the state to what was, at the time, a more lucrative position. I can't cancel it, so now I get to move into a pay cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 189

You deserved it 6 263

Today, at work, I was trying to get the octopus out of its tank to transfer it to another one. It instantly latched to my face and sprayed ink all over me. My boss told me to stop playing with the animals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 719

You deserved it 5 774

Today, I had to make a poster for social studies. I decided to write "Nice ass" in hieroglyphics. Turns out my teacher can read hieroglyphics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 649

You deserved it 52 451