Love, Weird, Religion and Break-ups: Excuses, excuses

Excuses, excuses

By TJ. - 17/10/2022 10:00

Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend. Why? She had been praying and came to the conclusion that God was telling her to leave so she could meet her soul mate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 918

You deserved it 127

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Same thing different taste

By hrtbrkn - 16/07/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me because "God told him to." What God didn't tell him was that I would check his e-mail and find all the e-mails to and from his new girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 323

You deserved it 6 215

By Afroman720 - 27/07/2015 18:55 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 775

You deserved it 2 890

By Brad - 08/03/2009 05:33 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for someone else. An hour earlier I had just gotten permission from her dad to propose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157 381

You deserved it 7 535

By sadface - 11/08/2010 06:50 - United States

Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend due to our long distance relationship. She then agreed to date my best friend who lives in the same town as me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 404

You deserved it 3 472

By Anonymous - 22/05/2019 14:00

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she believes I "jinxed" her chances of getting the job she wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 758

You deserved it 146

A good excuse

By Anonymous - 21/11/2019 01:00

Today, my ex-girlfriend, who broke up with me because God said she couldn't have a boyfriend, started dating my friend... Who she always told me she didn't even like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 280

You deserved it 225

By .... - 24/12/2013 02:48 - United States - Modesto

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 079

You deserved it 3 736

Know your worth

By Anonymous - 20/05/2021 04:01

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 98

By internetadvice - 01/04/2009 04:04 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that she wasn't really in love with me. She got that advice from an internet survey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 426

You deserved it 8 965

By socialix - 19/04/2015 01:03 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 724

You deserved it 3 423

RichardPencil 30

Monday 17 October 2022 15:38

Thank God you didn't get stuck with that religious fanatic!

Radulf 8

Tuesday 18 October 2022 1:03

the ways of the Lord are mysteriously - but you got damned lucky and/or she already met someone else.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 17 October 2022 15:38

Thank God you didn't get stuck with that religious fanatic!

Radulf 8

Tuesday 18 October 2022 1:03

the ways of the Lord are mysteriously - but you got damned lucky and/or she already met someone else.

wereallxmadhere 4

Thursday 20 October 2022 1:11

my money is on already met someone else based on her behavior in the days leading up to this

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Tuesday 18 October 2022 2:56

God works in mysterious ways. The plan was obviously for your benefit, not hers.

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Today, I went to the beach. I was in the ocean and I looked over my shoulder and saw a big black spot. Knowing that there were big crabs on the beach, I screamed. Everyone in the water heard including the lifeguards. It turns out it was just my shadow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 703

You deserved it 52 043

Today, it's Thanksgiving and I've spent the last few days imploring my husband not to antagonize my Trump-loving family by talking about the fact that they didn't look into what tariffs were at the time, and now they might have to close their business. Wish me luck… FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 234

The Top

Today, my son rejected a job offer because it interferes with the streaming schedule of some Twitch dirtbag. He's 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 991

You deserved it 213

Today, I have pink eye in both eyes, the stomach virus, and a cold. I'm also sitting at work because my boss "doesn't believe in sick days." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 658

You deserved it 3 680

Today, I let my little sister play a game using my Facebook account. She then accepted all of the people that had sent me a friend request. Among them included my boyfriend's crazy ex, and 3 people I've never met. Now I'm getting strange messages from all of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 272

You deserved it 5 039

Today, my car got stolen. While I was standing ten feet away from it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 744

You deserved it 7 182

Today, I had to take an oral examination. I made it to the last part of the exam, then violently threw up in the middle of my answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 192

You deserved it 3 269

Today, I discovered that I'm allergic to the flowering plant my passive-aggressive mother gave me for Christmas. I take two different antihistamines daily for my numerous allergies all year round, and my mother knows this is why I don't have house plants. She said, "You better not get rid of it!" I think she hates me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 128

You deserved it 159

Excuses, excuses

Same thing different taste

A good excuse

Know your worth

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