Facebook, Social Media and Geek: Get a life - FML

Get a life

By Anonymous - 23/02/2011 08:17 - United States

Today, I spent an hour deleting 70 of my status posts from the past week so I don't look so addicted to Facebook. Damn, I need a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 805

You deserved it 42 348

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Same thing different taste

By Baileyy - 01/03/2011 23:18 - United States

Today, while pensively thinking up my next awesome Facebook status over dinner, I finally came to the conclusion that I need to get a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 181

You deserved it 41 253

Nice try

By No.Life. - 14/07/2010 04:09 - United States

Today, I decided not to go on Facebook so people would actually think that I have a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 540

You deserved it 32 580

By NoLife - 15/05/2011 18:49 - United States

Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 082

You deserved it 34 729

Dopamine

By Kaya Marley Ramsey - 05/10/2021 06:00

Today, Facebook stopped working and I realized how emotionally dependent I am on social media. FML

I agree, your life sucks 332

You deserved it 1 072

By zuut - 18/01/2009 05:22 - Australia

Today, I logged on to Facebook for the first time in nine days. No new notifications. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 252

You deserved it 9 329

By Anonymous - 27/03/2011 18:41 - United States

Today, I realized I've been sinking into a deep depression, ignoring all my friends, and don't know what to do with my life anymore. This is all because I gave up Facebook for lent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 763

You deserved it 56 390

By SadManKillMeNow - 25/05/2019 22:00

Today, after deactivating my Facebook page 4 days ago for stalking reasons - as in me stalking my ex - I reactivated it for approximately 3 minutes to see what his status update was, then deactivated it again. I'm just THAT pathetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 664

You deserved it 2 891

Classic Redditor

By Bored - 05/04/2023 05:00 - United States

Today, most of my day was spent repeatedly checking to see how well my Reddit posts have been performing as of late. I think I need to find a hobby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 759

By Lifeless - 15/08/2010 08:42 - United States

Today, I put on makeup for a picture. My Facebook profile picture. That's how much of a life I actually have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 631

You deserved it 33 660

By Kimberly - 22/10/2009 12:26 - France

Today, I realized that I lie to my friends online and go "offline" for hours at a time so it appears that I have a life outside of the internet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 079

You deserved it 35 118

Next

Top comments

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 23 February 2011 12:06

You post (on average) 10 status updates a day? At that rate, you don't have to worry about people seeing that you don't have a social life, because everybody has already taken notice of that and hidden you from their news feed.

insanesna1l 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 12:33

did you post this as your new facebook status?

Comments

whorecrux 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 16:02

Haiku Time! I don't have a life Zuckerburg would have been proud I'm his prize minion

taelorrae011 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 16:08

can't really hide it now...

About3goats 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 16:38

hbu go out with some of you're friends on FB? And no one really cares what you do throughout the day so quit wasting time posting that shit on FB.

Zion0153 4

Wednesday 23 February 2011 17:15

How can your life life be f'ed if you don't have one?

SnowFlakeInAK 7

Wednesday 23 February 2011 17:36

It took you an hour?!? YDI Deleting them is ridiculous, everybody has already read them and knows you have no life. Try to not be so pathetic from now on. Go out, get a life, and post about it ONCE a day!

zembof 3

Wednesday 23 February 2011 17:39

Rule 34

dc295 3

Wednesday 23 February 2011 18:41

just get a twitter then

AkwardBitch 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 18:48

we're all addicted to facebook. :)

mightymart 5

Wednesday 23 February 2011 18:58

yeah... you do need a Life..

Hippie6 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 19:54

wow....douche for real bro :p

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, myself and my pug entered a novelty dog competition at the local fair. We won first prize in the lookalike contest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 234

Today, I realized I’ve been saying “a whole nother” instead of “a whole other” my entire life. It wasn’t until my friend pointed it out with a smirk I’ve been speaking in an alternate universe. He was also the one to point out last year that my use of "like" every three words was "annoying and cringe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 426

The Top

Today, I got my period 2 days early, while being interviewed for my dream job. Let's just say that I don't have very high hopes after walking backwards to the exit door and falling down upon colliding with the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 138

You deserved it 4 121

Today, I went on a date with the hottest guy I've ever met. He is also rich and successful, and would probably be perfect for me, if only he could stop bragging about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 027

You deserved it 14 115

Today, my husband bought me a present for our three year anniversary. It was a pack of 20 cigarettes. I don't smoke. He does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 185

You deserved it 8 986

Today, I set an alarm to wake up for a football match. I woke up after it finished. Turns out, I set my alarm to 12:15 p.m. instead of a.m. I ended up missing one of my team's best performances. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 107

You deserved it 1 509

Today, I walked past my fly strip while a fly who had been caught, but hadn't yet died, was on it. While I was there, I could hear his frantic buzzing and see his little arms flailing like mad as he tried in vain to escape. Great. Now I feel like shit for putting these things up. What kind of a monster am I? FML

I agree, your life sucks 612

You deserved it 381

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were just about to kiss. Until his mum walked in saying his girlfriend was at the door. I thought I was already there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 867

You deserved it 5 294