Sex, Gamers and Intimacy: Headshot! - FML

Headshot!

By Amb - 01/06/2010 23:56 - United States

Spicy

Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 073

You deserved it 6 199

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Same thing different taste

What a Q-tip

By Anonymous - 25/06/2013 16:21 - United States - Flowery Branch

Spicy

Today, I heard my boyfriend making the same noises while cleaning out his ears as the ones he makes whenever we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 545

You deserved it 6 494

By Noname - 16/02/2009 00:33 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 045

You deserved it 10 600

By Anonymous - 02/06/2012 10:24 - United Kingdom - Northampton

Spicy

Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 250

You deserved it 32 739

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 389

You deserved it 5 766

A good grunting

By Anonymous - 06/01/2013 13:06 - United States - Tampa

Spicy

Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 272

You deserved it 4 079

By atleasthelistened - 09/03/2016 08:04 - United States - Spokane

Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 547

You deserved it 2 451

By Hannah - 21/12/2010 17:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband said that when we have sex he almost gets as excited as he does when he gets a chopper gunner on Black Ops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 061

You deserved it 7 909

By The_Life - 12/10/2016 13:26 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I'm staying at my boyfriend's house and things were getting heated when he got a call from one of his mates wanting to play Counter Strike. Next thing I know, I'm laying in bed by myself listening to him rage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 063

You deserved it 1 282

By Helseac - 17/12/2018 03:00

Spicy

Today, I noticed my husband makes better sex sounds on the toilet then he does with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 747

You deserved it 456

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/11/2014 19:41 - United States - Los Angeles

Spicy

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 140

You deserved it 6 808

Next

Top comments

shakenbake93 0

Wednesday 2 June 2010 12:10

There's really no difference between the two so I don't see why you care that much.

Ducati4623 0

Thursday 3 June 2010 1:46

so he shouts "**** off you 8 year old little camping noob tubing prick" in bed? - that's pretty weird or winning would be more like "**** off I'm 1 off harriers" - again kinda strange I guess

Comments

futuredictater 6

Thursday 8 July 2010 20:45

trust me it happens to all guys

bluey111 0

Friday 9 July 2010 15:17

hey hey video games are serious buisness to us guys take it as a compliment

evilbunnypao 0

Friday 9 July 2010 16:08

i found this thread becomes war zone LOL well OP listen to #137, take it as compliment COD is serious business XD i know exactly how you feel, hahaha take it or leave it, you might surprise who he will choose you or his COD lol fyl

caboose261 0

Thursday 15 July 2010 18:44

Ha!!! Thats terrible, and #90 sucks at life as well lol

SoaringKiwi 0

Monday 19 July 2010 9:26

Super Smash Bros Brawl beats cods ass tbh...

BinxBreakdown 0

Friday 23 July 2010 9:22

lol i have the same problem

LeftyPitcher 0

Monday 26 July 2010 5:34

did he quickscope your nuke

reynoldssk8er18 0

Sunday 1 August 2010 3:37

he gets wargasms in bed

aggieskate900 0

Monday 9 August 2010 11:03

NERDGASM

me_sanchez 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 7:32

eeeewww!!!

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Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 189

You deserved it 11 246

Today, it's the first day of my two-week stay at my in-laws' house. They forbid drinking, smoking, cursing, and anything even remotely sexual. I smuggled in my quietest toy to keep me sane in this holy house. If only I hadn't forgotten to bring the battery pack too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 966

You deserved it 29 847

The Top

Today, someone called wanting to talk to my son. My 6-week-old baby is receiving more phone calls than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 707

You deserved it 471

Today, I was sitting at an airport bar when my flight, which was only supposed to leave in an hour, showed up as "Final call for boarding." I ran through the airport, only to find out they hadn't started boarding yet. Fucking Ryanair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 121

Today, my crush took me out to lunch. When the waiter came for our orders he ordered onoin rings and looks at me and says, "I won't be kissing anyone tonight anyways." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 742

You deserved it 4 549

Today, during my choral concert, I was helping turn the pages for the pianist who was accompanying the singers. In the middle of the song, one of the pages slipped and fell into his crotch area. In a panic, I frantically reached to grab the music. Well, I grabbed something. It wasn't the music. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 712

You deserved it 12 811

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating right after I maxed out my credit card buying him everything on his Christmas list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 929

You deserved it 16 302

Today, I vented to my friend about how unhappy I am and how I want to kill myself. What did she say? "Don't do that." That was it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 252