Sex, Cheating and Love: Nice try, Steve

Nice try, Steve

By betrayed - 16/07/2014 20:09 - United States - Portland

Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 614

You deserved it 4 593

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Same thing different taste

You must be kidding me

By SingleAndHomeless - 22/05/2022 18:00

Today, I came home early from work. My boyfriend and I live together. I open the door and I found my best friend watching TV on the couch, wearing lingerie. The room smelled like sex. She acted irrational and defensive, and had the audacity to ask what I was doing here. Bitch, I live here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 839

You deserved it 144

By Anonymous - 28/04/2018 23:00 - United States - Binghamton

Today, I found out that my best friend used the sexy dance moves she asked me to teach her to get into my ex-boyfriend’s pants. We dated for two years and broke up less than a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 219

You deserved it 434

What's going on here?

By Heartbroken - 30/10/2023 06:00

Today, I came home from work to hear loud moans coming from the room that my husband and I share. I barged in and both he and this girl are scrambling around the room. He’s a music teacher and claimed he was giving her vocal lessons. That would make more sense had they both not been half naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 526

You deserved it 119

By Anonymous - 01/03/2011 16:21 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 046

You deserved it 45 871

Roid rage incoming

By screwed - 22/12/2010 17:56 - Canada

Today, I accidentally walked in on my roommate while she was changing clothes. She insisted on telling her boyfriend what had happened, because, "It wouldn't feel right" if she didn't. Her boyfriend is a MMA fighter/bodybuilder and has major jealousy issues. I'm screwed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 368

You deserved it 4 284

Set the scene

By NJ. - 24/01/2009 10:41 - United States

Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 234

You deserved it 2 449

Classic

By Singleagain - 10/01/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, when I came home, my girlfriend was in sexy lingerie, and said it was a surprise for me. Sounds awesome, right? Too bad she was drenched in sweat and the room smelled like sex. I looked in the closet, only to get punched in the face by a naked guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 802

You deserved it 124

By drugged_on_arrival - 10/09/2009 10:55 - Virgin Islands British

Today, I woke up at my crazy ex-girlfriend's house, naked and disoriented. You know, the kind of crazy like we-didn't-break-up-it-was-just-a-fight-now-we-can-get-married crazy. She says everything's fine now and she's so glad we've "started our family." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 228

You deserved it 16 838

By je suis christy - 09/01/2015 19:04 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, while heading to the bathroom, I saw my girlfriend putting some lingerie under my bed. I stupidly thought it was for some sexy time later. Well, later on, she dramatically "found" the lingerie and broke up with me. Almost everyone believes her story and thinks I'm a dirty cheater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 940

You deserved it 3 144

By Anonymous - 14/03/2013 16:59 - Germany - Dortmund

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 730

You deserved it 10 555

cyttex 13

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:00

What a douchebag and shitty friend

HairyPunisher 27

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:00

They had nowhere better to go than your apartment? Time for new friends, a new girlfriend, and new locks OP.

Comments

cyttex 13

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:00

What a douchebag and shitty friend

katieemerr 15

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:14

You're better off without both of them OP!

MidnaLink 33

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:23

You also forgot his **** of an ex-girlfriend.

abdiG 27

Thursday 17 July 2014 2:06

show your idiot best friend you got balls and kick his sorry ass ************. that would teach him a valuable lesson. sorry op. fyl.

temmera 16

Thursday 17 July 2014 5:12

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

OysterPearls 33

Thursday 17 July 2014 5:27

72, they were referring to OP's girlfriend. Not that of his disloyal friend.

Kevin_Kestel 24

Thursday 17 July 2014 6:51

Your definitely right. Op I'm sorry to hear it. If I were you I'd keep my head high and get rid of them both. Good luck :)

NinjaDitto623 14

Thursday 17 July 2014 20:13

Maybe he was teaching her push-ups...? Jk, FYL OP

ChaCerCam 14

Thursday 17 July 2014 23:15

why so many dislikes he's being more honest than half of all the comments.

theinformer 3

Friday 18 July 2014 2:44

I find it funny that this comment was down-voted as apposed to the comment calling the guy a asshole,douche,and a dick are given thumbs up, just curious.

igive 29

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:00

A swift kick in the nads for him, the shins for her.

Kruiser 16

Thursday 17 July 2014 5:11

When you say 'the idiot actually had the balls' you're saying that because you kicked his balls so hard they aren't functioning anymore, right? People like that shouldn't reproduce

friedpwnadge 25

Thursday 17 July 2014 5:27

Guess OP has read FML enough to know we would just say to dump her anyways.

incoherentrmblr 21

Thursday 17 July 2014 6:33

Shins? I'm sorry, but she's getting kicked in the ****** too...

igive 29

Thursday 17 July 2014 6:38

Nah his foot might get stuck.

fortune789 17

Thursday 17 July 2014 19:03

More like his foot would get sucked into a plans of oblivion.

dudecall 18

Friday 18 July 2014 6:09

HairyPunisher 27

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:00

They had nowhere better to go than your apartment? Time for new friends, a new girlfriend, and new locks OP.

iateapenguin 27

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:59

Maybe OP and his girlfriend were living together?

HairyPunisher 27

Thursday 17 July 2014 2:25

Maybe. I didn't think of that. He'd better make her move out if that's the case.

salvorican 24

Thursday 17 July 2014 2:47

Even so, ops ex was stupid to cheat in their own home.

TheElBurrrito 21

Thursday 17 July 2014 6:15

#3, I think the second part of your statement/question still stands.

doctorhook86 24

Thursday 17 July 2014 7:38

#43: You're not wrong, but it wouldn't be any more right if she'd cheated someplace else.

meepingoreos 6

Monday 21 July 2014 0:35

Maybe the best friend is his roommate.

Meggston 17

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:00

I hope your best friend is an ex now too. ::(

BoltTheSuperdog 22

Thursday 17 July 2014 10:37

Is that like an alien or a spider emoticon you have at the end there?

Meggston 17

Thursday 17 July 2014 16:04

Alien. ^-^

Since1998 20

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:01

How did he think "we were doing pushups" was a valid excuse...

ohdode 9

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:09

I too teach my friends girlfriends push-ups in their underwear....

foxwasalamb 24

Thursday 17 July 2014 2:16

you can see the muscles much clearer without the barrier of clothing

mike7800 8

Thursday 17 July 2014 10:10

I know! aerobics would've been much better

annabelle92212 10

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:01

wow im sorry op I hope u kicked the "best friend" to the curb after you use him as a punching bag

saba_ajira 29

Thursday 17 July 2014 8:08

Its what I would have done

thatsabiggun 11

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:02

Well, I'm sorry to say, but you had a ***** for a girlfriend, and an idiot for a best friend.

wildsweetchild 19

Thursday 17 July 2014 10:25

at least OP got rid of both of them in one shot.

annabelle92212 10

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:02

wow im so sorry I hope u kicked ur best friend to the curb bleeding

Vitally 6

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:03

Now teach her how to pick up her belongings off the street, then teach him how to dodge a punch. The second one might take a few tries before he gets it right.

grogers311 20

Thursday 17 July 2014 3:15

Best comment ever!!!

NandaPanda 22

Thursday 17 July 2014 4:27

If you can dodge a wrench you can dodge a punch ;D

sharklover2017 11

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:03

What a piece of shit friend! I'm a girl, and even I know bros before hoes... And this girl is definitely a how for not having the balls to end it before ******* someone else...

teentee401 36

Thursday 17 July 2014 7:30

This isn't really "bros before hoes" since he didn't chose a "hoe" over a bro. It's more like "bros before being a dick and sleeping with your bro's girlfriend"