Intimacy: Romance is dead

Romance is dead

By Anonymous - 15/02/2010 13:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished, I jokingly said, "Who's going to sleep in the wet patch?" He got up and said, "You're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing." It was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 565

You deserved it 4 529

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Same thing different taste

By disapointed girl - 28/12/2009 16:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 026

You deserved it 5 897

By Laura - 17/09/2010 00:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of three years decided it was finally time to have sex. After we did, he told me that he was sleeping with another girl. He wanted to have sex with me to see who was better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 777

You deserved it 6 227

Valid reason

By stephhh055 - 21/10/2019 16:00 - United States - Portland

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend for the first time, he told me he wanted to break up. He told me my orgasm face wasn't something he could put up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 502

You deserved it 271

By hikingtospace - 04/10/2016 15:25 - United States - Hilliard

Today, after laying down to sleep, my boyfriend seemed like he was having trouble trying to say something. After asking what was wrong a couple of times, he said, "I don't want to do this anymore" and got up and left. I had planned on telling him I love him. Saved myself some embarrassment I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 590

You deserved it 954

By Anonymous - 04/03/2012 07:07 - United States

Today, things were getting heated with my boyfriend and I told him that I was finally ready to lose my virginity. Clearly he couldn't wait to get started because he fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 853

You deserved it 4 247

By Bigfatfailure - 28/03/2013 10:02 - United States - Garden Grove

Today, I got dumped during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 524

You deserved it 9 858

Sick sex, dude

By Anonymous - 18/01/2011 02:13 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. Right after, he left the room and went to the bathroom to throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 501

You deserved it 5 229

Giggle loop

By Anonymous - 18/03/2010 10:39 - United States

Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 328

You deserved it 38 293

Follow the script

By ufhdafuhds - 19/03/2009 23:31 - Egypt

Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 139 405

You deserved it 14 505

By Anonymous - 15/01/2013 17:45 - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 798

You deserved it 6 663

Starfire22 5

Monday 15 February 2010 16:41

What a jerk! Sorry OP, hopefully you'll find someone who will appreciate you for yourself not sex :(

finndizzle 0

Monday 15 February 2010 16:50

putting your faith in god has nothing to do withthe fact that he pumped n dumped her. iIt has everything to do with that guy is an ass hole

Comments

lepercaunsal 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 3:44

sucks I would apreciate it ;)

razz122 5

Tuesday 16 February 2010 4:04

@ 15 So a guy is an ass for doing it but it is perfectly okay for a girl to. I smell a double standard

razz122 5

Tuesday 16 February 2010 4:11

Thats whybsex before marriage is good. So you dont get stuck with an asshole

serenaaaa_fml 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 4:33

ydi for sleeping wit him

kingzozi97 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 4:33

thats a pretty douche move on his part

bjcarson 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 4:58

wonder if she was a bleeder...

helo2 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 5:07

lmfao

fairies633 8

Tuesday 16 February 2010 6:40

all of u need to shut the **** up and stop being morons if she wants to wait...then that's her buisness. she has a right to state her opinion.

jenniferxxlou 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 7:21

he sounds...uh... nice :/ sorry bout that

lilarielle14 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 7:23

what a dick .. he can't even take a joke..

mpclaw 3

Tuesday 16 February 2010 7:29

you should be so glad he did what he did now, and not later. tell him f off

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 789

You deserved it 3 967

Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He said, "Yeah well, you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 925

You deserved it 4 148

The Top

Today, we had my grandmother with dementia round for tea. She looked me up and down and said, very matter-of-factly, "Well, with a figure like that, no one will rape you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 339

You deserved it 2 400

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after finding out my parents are divorced. Same reason my last three girlfriends broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 203

You deserved it 137

Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 909

You deserved it 4 060

Today, I still can't open my curtains or door without ADHD teenage neighbour screaming my name and waving from my across the road. I moved from a city to this place so I could have a big garden to help my extreme social anxiety. When I go outside, she comes running over. Sometimes she brings her dog, who shits on my lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 905

You deserved it 168

Today, in my job as an assistant at a music venue, I had to get posters signed by that night's performer. When I walked into the dressing room, I was told, "unless you're sucking my cock then get the fuck out of here" and had the posters slapped out of my hands. It's my job to deal with these pricks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 330

You deserved it 3 585

Today, it's my birthday. I woke up to a text message from my boyfriend, breaking up with me. When I commented on his impeccably bad timing, he admitted he'd forgotten it was my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 087

You deserved it 3 368