So close, but yet so far

By socks - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to explain to a woman I didn't know that my husband was killed overseas. She replied, "I know exactly how you feel, my dog died last month." FML
I agree, your life sucks 49 611
You deserved it 3 477

Top comments

I know how she feels, yesterday I couldn't find my shoes.

Nico_Belic 0

Some people just don't know what they're saying.

Comments

Nico_Belic 0

Some people just don't know what they're saying.

She was just trying to make you feel better, but a dog doesn't compare to your husband.

22cute 17

I'm so sorry for your loss, OP. And sorry that lady is a babbling fool.

fthislyfe 22

Maybe she loved her dog more than her husband.

People saying that others deserve stuff like this is just pathetic

sweetheartxoxo88 7

She probably hadn't had a person she loved die and her dog's death was the only way she knew to empathize.

monkeys1315 0

She was just trying her best to make you feel better. Some people have never lost a loved one

' I lost my brother in Afghanistan 2 years ago so I know how you truly feel.' Nope, even you can't know how she truly feels. Every person deals differerently with death, and you can't even compare one death to another. Only the OP knows how she feels.

102 has it right. No two lives are the same, so no two deaths are the same. Even other people who knew the husband wont know how she feels, because their relationship was different. The loss of a loved one will always be an individual experience.

It's sad when people try to turn things back to themselves. It's not about trying to relate to someone's pain, it's about trying to make them feel better. That sometimes involves "When my father died, I did this to ease the pain", but it's not okay to say "I know how you feel"

RedSharpieInk 5

LOL she compared your husband to her dog

tjv3 10

I hate it when people say " I know exactly how you feel" because they don't know. everyone feels in different ways and reacts differently emotionally

je_suis_fml 11

Who the **** clicked on "ydi"? heartless bastards.. smh

mgsoloist 14

A lot of people would just be caught off guard and wouldn't know what to say, so they try the best they can. I wouldn't know what to say either, so I would probably say something just as stupid.

you should never judge. what if she lost all her family and the dog was all she had? what if she had the dog for ages and had become really close with it? my friend had to put her dog down after having him for 10 years, and she still has a piece of her heart missing (not literally, don't be harsh) because that dog was her bestfriend ever since she was little. you don't know the woman's story.

Some people actually value the animals they are close to. I have lost both close family members and pets. The pain can be similar, and although one person's loss can't ever really compare to another, you have to understand that no one's pain is invalid. My cat, who is 20 and has been with me since I was 8 years old, is slowly dying of kidney failure. There were long stretches of my life that he was the only real friend I had, because I was severely bullied. Last month my parents thought it was the end, and I flew 3,000 miles just to be with him for a few days. Long story short, an animal can be just as important as a human to some people. It wasn't fair for the woman to say she knew exactly how OP felt, but can we please give her the benefit of the doubt and not immediately judge her?

I know how she feels, yesterday I couldn't find my shoes.

madskittlesftw 5

Yesterday I lost my virginity and I still cant seem to find it..

^^ hahaha....damn. Looks like you won't be finding it anytime soon........

From the looks of it 31 it also appears that you have also lost your face in addition to that shirt. Tsk tsk.

ThatFatGuyBehind 3

Yesterday I forgot to do my homework so I know how you 2 feel.

The_FMLs 0

That's not funny, but I still laughed :)

Today I went searching for witty commebts. I have yet to find any, so I know how they feel.

Today, I took sixteen hits of acid so I see kittens in the sky.

just_dandy20 2

#201 **** the dog! You damn retard. Her husband, a human being someone she chose to be married to for LIFE. Passed away while serving this country, to keep dumb ***** like you safe!

That lady probably has 9 dogs. Sorry for your loss OP.

Jbfu 0

Yes, cause having 8 dogs is a stereotype...

Jbfu 0

It's ok, soon you will be out of high school and hopefully you will go to college and learn the true meaning of words!

I'm so white I dip my fries in mayo. Probably explains the obesity too....

chell1894 13

And you probably got pregnant at 13. I like this game :)

Stereotypes wouldn't exist if there wasn't a reason for them to. People are "stereotyped" all the time. Get over it lol

I ******* love mayo on fries. And don't worry, I'm not obese... Yet.

She's just trying to be helpful, but yea, she doesn't know how you feel.

I guess you spend a lot of time being sick then.. 'cause THEY'RE EVERYWHERE MAN!

I don't think she meant to be disrespectful

chell1894 13

Sadly, the veil of the Internet lets people go all asshole-ish. Someone is gonna make a comment about how she deserved it for (presumably) marrying a "filthy capitalist war pig". I was once called that when I walked out of a gun shop with a box of .22 LR ammo. If anyone jeers or mocks you, OP, just know that for every one asshole, there's 10 people who would love to teach them a lesson about respect.

chell1894 13

177, I CAN'T stand that BS. They are damn lucky these people sacrifice there lives and families to be "war hungry pigs" because of they didn't we would go back to drafting and anyone would have to serve or be thrown in jail. Makes me furious when I hear of arrogant people like that.

178, I'm glad I live in the Northwest. I've only run into mobs of uber-liberals in California. Go figure.

Some ppl feel like their pets r family if she is a lonely peraon tht could have been her only friend doesnt matter if its a dog its always there when she needs it Its not being disrespectful

Krista835 5

Sometimes it's hard to make people feel better about the death of someone, because in most cases you really don't know. She probably just wasn't sure about what to say and that was the first thing that came to mind so she said it hopefully her intentions were good though.

That dog could have been like family to her (.) and to be honest the loose of a pet CAN feel like the loss of a close relative and from that I am also assuming relationships. Also the OP would have been one of the first people who was told about the death so my doubts for some random woman knowing of the OPs husband dying before (s)he did are high.

You both make very good points. We lost our cat just 2 weeks ago, and it's amazing how our home feels "wrong," kind of empty & sad.

Victoria_angel_ 0

That woman is a moron, that's saying it a nice as possible