If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend (or when you get one) and you are at that base, show them the FML and ask them to demonstrate.

Lizza, this is very simple. OP was at a taco-eating contest, and his girlfriend wanted to win. So she told him it was NOT a contest just to confuse him so she could win. Make sense?

LMFAO^^^

It all makes so much sense now..

hahahaahahhaahha nice somethings should be kept a mystery

I thought they were munching *******

Elle cherchait dans l'œil de sa pâle victime le cantique muet que chante le plaisir et cette gratitude infinie et sublime qui sort de la paupière ainsi qu'un long soupir. - " Hippolyte, cher coeur, que dis-tu de ces choses ? Comprends-tu maintenant qu'il ne faut pas offrir l'holocauste sacré de tes premières roses aux souffles violents qui pourraient les flétrir ? Mes baisers sont légers comme ces éphémères qui caressent le soir les grands lacs transparents et ceux de ton amant creuseront leurs ornières comme des chariots ou des socs déchirants.

Prinzess: s'il te plaît, parle anglais; c'est pas VDM. :)

Well at least it's not off-topic :-) Baudelaire, by the way

It's lovely, but I fear the beauty is lost on a lot of our non French-speaking readers!

Sorry if someone felt excluded! Actually I wanted to tease you a little and see if you were going to translate it too. ;) "Whoever likes you well gives you hell!" Good night!

Dear broderick: *sigh*. Really *sigh*. I hate it when my little phrase turns out, once again, to be correct. You're definitely "trop beau pour être hétéro" (= too handsome to be straight)! (Haters, check out his info before you shoot at me.) At least I hope you're a sperm donor, the world needs your genes!

Dear Princess.. Girls that miss the looks or the gentleness of homosexual man in heterosexual man should set their priorities straight first. Often it's a case of not discover sexuality yet and THINKING that you like man, but actally looking for a feminine features. Just pointing you out at something...

I don't really understand but is there some homophobic innuendo there? And no I don't miss anything, happily engaged. But hey, this was humour. And second, yes I am bi. Do you have a problem with that?

No homophobic innuendo here. Besides I am bi myself. Just keeping the conversation interesting:)

# 107, *WOOSH* There goes another wonderful joke! Wasted on clueless people.

yadarrra!!?

el punto es: PRUEBA, no come...y a veces sabe a pollo....pero no se traga. duh

And in certain parts of "America" they speak Spanish. Your point?

pinkeybear, you do realize that the web in and of itself is not American right? there is a reason why it is called the WORLD WIDE web... it means people WORLD WIDE get on, including websites like FML. Your ignorance is why everyone else hates Americans

No pinkybear, YOU'RE in America. OP is in Switzerland, Fmylife.com is French, and a great many of the commenters here are not American. Get a goddamned clue before making stupid statements like that.

Congratulations, Pinkybear7!! You know where you are! **|*/* ^_^ **|*/*

Does anybody know what they said in Spanish? I have a feeling it was funny but I can't comprehend it.

use google translate.

Nocanhaz: él piensa que las vaginas saben a pez. Tal vez debes dejar de hacer sexo oral mientras está en el mar.

that comment got moderated?!?! I have seen worse things posted... FML...

if writing in coherent English is a Pre-req to using this site, over 80 per cent of us are in deep shyte

dog is pretty

Exactly what I was thinking. (Except you shouldn't should call her a bitch, might be she just had a bad day, but that's still no way to do it) Apparently, startling her boyfriend and probably kicking his confidence down by yelling at him is better than saying "Whoa, slow down baby" and then proceeding to offer constructive criticism. Reverse the roles and you'll have an FML loaded with "Wow, what an asshole, dump him!"

very true! if she has a problem with what you are doing, then constructive criticism would be the correct response.