The Crank

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Spicy
Today, the closest I came to doing something that could be vaguely construed as "constructive" was wanking and crying. Sometimes simultaneously. FML
I agree, your life sucks 13 423
You deserved it 28 728
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Top comments

dudeitsdanny 9

Are you so bad you can't even satisfy yourself? e.e... I'm sorry, this is just pathetic.. Crying and masturbating? masturbation guilt? I.. I can't even fathom this. How can you even get off while crying?

99 7
flockz 19

BUT I CRIED THE WHOLE!! oh wait u didnt have sex.....

95 9

Comments

Krista835 5

I'm not the only one that doesn't understand how that's constructive... Right?

2 0
Maverick52 13

Well I guess your biceps must be rock hard then :P

0 0
Tkao96 0

That's bad if you cry. Make some new friends other than Jill...(:

1 0
bullrider92 19

You must be doing it wrong if it makes you cry.

0 0
perdix 29

You're pulling too hard! I know they call it "whacking off," but it doesn't mean that you literally hit it. Trim your pubes and use lotion -- it's all about technique.

3 1
Sun_Kissed18 25

Completely read "closet" first and was thoroughly confused

1 0
Halcyon3210 6

I did the same thing and thought he was wanking and crying in a closet. . .

0 0
sylverdrag_fml 9

When you feel like that, get out of your house and take a walk outside. Look around you and you will find you feel better after a while.

0 0