By Innocent - 28/01/2012 13:40

Spicy
Today, I came home to a furious wife and an answering machine message from a woman neither of us know claiming I got her pregnant. My wife won't believe she got the wrong number. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 510
You deserved it 3 034
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Top comments

mike3775 35

guess you will have to wait 9 months to prove yourself

145 4
eva_baby25 4

She calls back a week later after you get chewed out, " sorry wrong number"

120 1

Comments

Havin 19

I had nothing to write so I just wrote this.

7 41
CryMoreFMLs 14

You're both incompetant... (praying I spelled that right)

10 2
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5

Wasteful comment. The end.

2 0
silentbutfunny 0

Wasteful thread. Wait, im feeding into it >.

2 0
CaptainPickles72 18

Havin is a waste of an FML profile! He made the exact same comment on the FML where the girlfriend said her boyfriend was like her brother. If you're gonna waste a comment at least use something new!

0 0
perdix 29

Just because you "hit it and quit it" doesn't mean you don't know her. You are not innocent because your forgot her name in your drunken stupor.

34 62
eeeeeeee 5

You know, not everything warrants a cynical response.

37 7
perdix 29

I agree, eee..., not every story warrants a cynical response. But, this one does! You think the wife would have been "furious" if she hadn't already suspected the OP was ******* around? If things were good between them, his denial would have been sufficient. Am I cynical, or insightful?

27 30
silentbutfunny 0

First time i seen perdix on the defensive... O.o

34 0
Pr0metheus 7

First time I've seen perdix get buried, now we will feel his wrath

6 3
mama2b3 20

You raise a good point Perdix, I'll go with insightful.

3 10
CBlaze93 10

Your neither. Your just not right in the head.

6 8
perdix 29

Pr0metheus, I've been buried dozens of times.

12 6
RedPillSucks 31

I liked Jumber10's rap, though.

3 1
Ins_Knie 2

Perdix the lawyer has lucifer as the main client. I don't always like his comments, but they are always brilliant. He gets my thumbs up while his naysayers get the finger.

5 2
rttr 18

Bbbbbb but that's perdix's specialty.

0 1
bitchslapped22 14

Well just try to convince her

4 5
A7x4REVer 3

Get a guy friend to text her saying "thanks for the great time last night ;)" and accuse her of cheating

30 7
BeccaHugs 17

Yeah that sounds like a healthy marriage.

16 1
Furrywhiplash 14

61- It may not sound like a healthy marriage, but it does sound like a normal one.

18 2
diidiimi 10

I don't see how that's a normal marriage?

0 2
silentbutfunny 0

127, you do know 50% of marriages end up being divorces, right? If half the people are doin it, id say its normal.

0 1
mike3775 35

I still have an answering machine, along with caller ID. When the wife and I see whose calling via Caller ID, and we both don't want to bother, we let it go tot he machine after 4 rings to see what they want.

6 0
Enslaved 36

I also have an answering machine. I let the machine pick up and I screen all my calls. My cell phone number is given out to only my closest of friends. Anything else such as doctor visits reminders etc.... Are through my land line number.(:

1 0
mekora 6

Easy solution, call the woman (if she left her # or whatever) put her on speakerphone and ask who she was trying to contact. When she gives the wrong name, explain the situation to her, with your wife right there. If she is any sort of decent person she will confirm that she called the wrong #.

27 0
mekora 6

Fraternity test? As in see what fraternity party she went to and got pregnant at?

18 0
OhHushDear 11

Lol that made me laugh so hard xD The word you're looking for is paternity.

3 0
chelseaaa92 7

Wow, that's awful! The truth will come out sooner or later!

6 0
perdix 29

Maury Povich can save you . . . or doom you. Are you SURE you're not the papa?

26 6
kittenvks 11

Which is basically the same thing that you said in the last comment that got buried this one got lots of thumbs up. I applaud you Perdix, you really know how to work a crowd :D

4 1
moop256 10

Or make A bunch of fake profiles...

2 5
cannibletaco 6

168- I've seen plenty of you comments and this is by far the dumbest one.

3 0
chellyX92 8

She called and said "hey you got me pregnant" and hung up no name no nothing. Well she's an idiot it's ashame she's breeding. FYL btw.

5 2