Miscellaneous: Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the...

By Hannah - 04/03/2012 20:46 - United States

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 994

You deserved it 31 758

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Same thing different taste

By QWERTY - 03/04/2011 23:20

Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 185

You deserved it 18 249

By MyNameIsNotJeff - 08/05/2015 03:23 - United States

Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 224

You deserved it 3 110

My finest hour

By Anonymous - 04/05/2024 06:00 - Canada

Today, I finally conquered my fear of spiders by catching one in a cup and releasing it outside. Feeling proud of my bravery, I proudly showed my accomplishment to my roommate, only to realize it wasn't a spider but a piece of lint. I screamed louder than I would have for a spider. FML

I agree, your life sucks 310

You deserved it 200

By eyes wide SHIT - 28/12/2013 01:37 - Australia

Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 024

You deserved it 5 960

By spiderwoman - 15/04/2011 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 299

You deserved it 32 194

By nopenopenopenope - 23/09/2016 03:28 - United States - Winston Salem

Today, I tried to have a relaxing soak in the tub. The giant wolf spider that was already in the tub didn't like me trying to set it free outside. It ran right across my feet and back into my house when I dumped it out of a cup outside. I screamed like a little girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 679

You deserved it 2 475

By jillydark6609 - 19/09/2010 06:21 - United States

Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 287

You deserved it 14 264

By MushyKetchup - 14/08/2015 07:01 - United States - Amarillo

Today, a tarantula joined my stuffed animal collection in its drawer. It, unfortunately, wasn't stuffed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 211

You deserved it 1 993

By eightleggedtictac - 08/06/2014 15:10 - United States - Worcester

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend shrieking at the top of his lungs. I ran into the dining room where he was, to find him standing on the table screaming "Kill it!" while pointing at an unmoving spider the size of a Tic Tac on the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 784

You deserved it 6 855

Adapt, improvise, overcome

By Arthur B. - 24/09/2019 12:01

Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 464

CandidB 4

Monday 5 March 2012 1:20

How do u impress someone by showing the smashes remains of a dead spider?

lexa1love 16

Monday 5 March 2012 1:21

I would have done the same thing. The spider should not have been crawling around free, and he should have told u about his pet when moving in.

Comments

DeathBunny218 37

Monday 5 March 2012 12:28

After reading these comments I think I'm the only one who feels sorry for the spider :(

PieterseMJ 20

Monday 5 March 2012 12:59

well done OP! i would have whacked the crap out of it too if i finally manned up enough to get that close to it!! why was it running around in the house in any way?!

newburton13 26

Monday 5 March 2012 13:19

He shouldn't have had a tarantula just running around like that. But you should also be able to recognize a non-native spider when you see one.

chuckcloninger 12

Monday 5 March 2012 13:53

Maybe when he buys his next "bug" he will also buy a cage to keep it in

awesomeAlexx0 0

Monday 5 March 2012 13:58

Well looks like you and him are going to have some interesting conversations for the next week

jujubunni5 9

Monday 5 March 2012 14:10

He should have told you he had a pet spider. FYL

VampasarousRex 6

Monday 5 March 2012 14:51

I would've killed the spider even if I knew it was his pet. On average, you eat 8 spiders in your sleep. That would be one hell of a spider to unconsciously swallow.

Levvy 22

Monday 5 March 2012 15:38

That statistic was specifically made up just to prove people will believe any statistic thrown at them. Congratulations: You're as gullible as you are mean-spirited.

chels1994 11

Monday 5 March 2012 15:05

Guess (s)he should have mentioned that they had a pet tarantula

chels1994 11

Monday 5 March 2012 15:06

thought it said "it was their pet tarantula"...my bad :p

Levvy 22

Monday 5 March 2012 15:40

"Today, I learned that killing things for the crime of simply existing might actually have consequences sometimes."

saidawhiting 14

Monday 5 March 2012 19:09

Oh, please. You're making this way more dramatic than it needs to be. The OP was scared and panicked - she's not a bad person for smashing the tarantula.