Health: Today, I found out I have an abscess in my bellybutton which...

By Anonymous - 18/10/2011 20:35 - United States

Today, I found out I have an abscess in my bellybutton which causes me extreme pain and discomfort when I sit down. I am a receptionist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 153

You deserved it 2 670

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Same thing different taste

Disgusting

By ocdeane - 01/10/2019 22:00 - Germany - Mainz

Today, I noticed a disgusting, cheesy smell and spent all day wondering what it was. I later found out that it wasn't coming from my feet, but from my belly button. My surgery wound got infected. I'm a germaphobe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 271

Grossed out

By Anonymous - 18/06/2020 23:03

Today, I found out that the reason I have unbearable pain in my stomach when I sit down is because I have 2 horrifyingly large boils on my waist. My mother nearly fainted when I showed them to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 338

You deserved it 247

By Sadness - 07/10/2013 18:55 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I have been home sick and depressed for so long that I just found Oreo crumbs in my belly button. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 788

You deserved it 17 536

Double down

By coyote - 02/09/2010 07:25 - Japan

Today, I'm recovering from abdominal surgery. In addition to pain, I'm having trouble peeing and haven't pooped since Sunday, so my surgeon prescribed a laxative. Turns out I'm allergic to it. Now I'm covered in hives, even in my ears, incisions, and lady parts. I also still haven't pooped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 040

You deserved it 2 806

By squirty_joe - 08/03/2009 18:37 - United States

Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 292

You deserved it 20 550

Nice.

By poururheartout - 27/07/2018 20:30

Today, I went to the ER as I have an ulcer and I was exhibiting signs of a perforation. This is when the gorgeous doctor told me he had to stick his finger up my butt to check for rectal bleeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 279

You deserved it 398

Better out than in

By Anonymous - 20/05/2020 02:00

Today, I had the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my lower right abdomen. I was doubled over and vomiting it hurt so bad. After going to the E.R., thinking it was my appendix and getting checked in, I let out the biggest most rancid fart in my life and the pain immediately went away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 905

You deserved it 413

By Anonymous - 23/01/2016 01:43 - Canada - Moncton

Today, I discovered that the pain I've had for the past couple of weeks was actually due to a broken collar bone. Now work won't pay for the treatment I need because I continued to work despite the pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 598

You deserved it 2 285

By sy123 - 29/07/2012 23:34 - United States - Frankfort

Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 473

You deserved it 1 868

By fulloshit - 28/11/2010 02:17 - United States

Today, I woke up with extreme stomach pains. After being rushed to the hospital and having numerous tests performed, I was told my intestines were over-stretched with stool. I'm essentially so full of shit it hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 064

You deserved it 4 595

yesio12 13

Wednesday 19 October 2011 7:59

You should get that checked out. It's affecting your daily life and causing pain :/

every1luvsboners 11

Wednesday 19 October 2011 8:01

Go to a car wash, pay the 50 cents to use the vacuum on your belly button and it'll suck that thing right out of there.

Comments

BuckNekkid 22

Wednesday 19 October 2011 17:23

from your piercing?

beerankin 0

Wednesday 19 October 2011 18:19

You should really fix that. That sucks bad!

Calyx_fml 21

Wednesday 19 October 2011 18:42

You can stand as a receptionist.

Daralea 21

Wednesday 19 October 2011 20:02

no shit?

ajjucool 0

Wednesday 19 October 2011 21:45

go see the doc!

skyeyez9 24

Wednesday 19 October 2011 22:54

Cant you take a couple days off?

Youwish1 0

Wednesday 19 October 2011 23:07

It may be a mrsa, get it checked!

PokeTate 1

Thursday 20 October 2011 0:48

How did you even do that? o.O'

vincespektor 0

Thursday 20 October 2011 1:13

Get surgery. Problem solved.

holdenthemonkey 3

Thursday 20 October 2011 1:50

Try Walmart I don't think the greeter's have to sit unless they are in a wheel chair... Best of luck.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I got back from my honeymoon. Return flights from Australia to New Zealand? $1,800. A week’s accomodation in another country? $1,500. Busting my new husband finger banging a barmaid by the public pool? Fucking priceless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 054

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Today, while in my room on the computer, I had a sudden urge to pee. I got up to use the loo and started hearing some disturbing noises from inside. Apparently I was so quiet my parents thought I was gone and decided to have sex in the shower. It's been an hour and my bladder is about to burst. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 534

You deserved it 3 261

The Top

Today, and recently, many of my friends have been acting strangely. My birthday is coming up soon, so I thought maybe they were planning a surprise party. Nope. Turns out they've just been secretly hanging out without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 484

You deserved it 1 785

Today, while I was eating cereal, my mother thought it would be appropriate to grab the bowl and start spoon-feeding me while making airplane noises, again. I'm 19. FML

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You deserved it 8 795

Today, I was walking down the street when a man stole my purse. He then opened the purse, threw up in it, and gave it back. FML

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You deserved it 3 568

Today, a wheelchair-bound kid in my study hall dropped one of his textbooks on the ground and he couldn't reach it. When I noticed, I stopped what I was doing to go pick it up for him. The problem is, he sits right in front of the door, so I got yelled at for "trying to leave class without permission." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 248

You deserved it 124

Today, I was working at Coldstone. When a customer tips us we are required to sing. A late night DJ came in, put 20 dollars in the tip cup, and asked to hear every song we had. After we sang one song he looked at me and asked me to please stop singing or he was taking his money back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 128

You deserved it 8 972

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 2 years and my best friend of 10 years making out in my bedroom. I stared and when they noticed me, my boyfriend didn’t even bat an eye and suggested we have a threesome. My best friend immediately agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 365

You deserved it 678