Health: Today, I found out I have an abscess in my bellybutton which... - FML

By Anonymous - 18/10/2011 20:35 - United States

Today, I found out I have an abscess in my bellybutton which causes me extreme pain and discomfort when I sit down. I am a receptionist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 153

You deserved it 2 670

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Same thing different taste

Disgusting

By ocdeane - 01/10/2019 22:00 - Germany - Mainz

Today, I noticed a disgusting, cheesy smell and spent all day wondering what it was. I later found out that it wasn't coming from my feet, but from my belly button. My surgery wound got infected. I'm a germaphobe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 581

You deserved it 273

Grossed out

By Anonymous - 18/06/2020 23:03

Today, I found out that the reason I have unbearable pain in my stomach when I sit down is because I have 2 horrifyingly large boils on my waist. My mother nearly fainted when I showed them to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 338

You deserved it 247

By Sadness - 07/10/2013 18:55 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I have been home sick and depressed for so long that I just found Oreo crumbs in my belly button. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 788

You deserved it 17 538

Double down

By coyote - 02/09/2010 07:25 - Japan

Today, I'm recovering from abdominal surgery. In addition to pain, I'm having trouble peeing and haven't pooped since Sunday, so my surgeon prescribed a laxative. Turns out I'm allergic to it. Now I'm covered in hives, even in my ears, incisions, and lady parts. I also still haven't pooped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 042

You deserved it 2 807

By squirty_joe - 08/03/2009 18:37 - United States

Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 296

You deserved it 20 551

Nice.

By poururheartout - 27/07/2018 20:30

Today, I went to the ER as I have an ulcer and I was exhibiting signs of a perforation. This is when the gorgeous doctor told me he had to stick his finger up my butt to check for rectal bleeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 279

You deserved it 398

Silver linings

By Butt Hurt - 10/11/2024 09:00 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I woke up with a big and very painful pimple on the inside of my butt cheek. Because of my Crohn's disease decided to flare up at the same time, my 3 trips to the bathroom at work were only tolerable because I didn't have to deal with rude customers yelling at me for situations I have no control over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 66

Better out than in

By Anonymous - 20/05/2020 02:00

Today, I had the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my lower right abdomen. I was doubled over and vomiting it hurt so bad. After going to the E.R., thinking it was my appendix and getting checked in, I let out the biggest most rancid fart in my life and the pain immediately went away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 906

You deserved it 413

By Anonymous - 23/01/2016 01:43 - Canada - Moncton

Today, I discovered that the pain I've had for the past couple of weeks was actually due to a broken collar bone. Now work won't pay for the treatment I need because I continued to work despite the pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 599

You deserved it 2 285

By sy123 - 29/07/2012 23:34 - United States - Frankfort

Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 474

You deserved it 1 868

Next

Top comments

yesio12 13

Wednesday 19 October 2011 7:59

You should get that checked out. It's affecting your daily life and causing pain :/

every1luvsboners 11

Wednesday 19 October 2011 8:01

Go to a car wash, pay the 50 cents to use the vacuum on your belly button and it'll suck that thing right out of there.

Comments

Enslaved 36

Wednesday 19 October 2011 9:27

I like it! It reminds me of Sid Vicious but still includes your own style.(: I'm a huge "Sex Pistols" fan!

vettle 6

Wednesday 19 October 2011 9:55

Easiest jobs ever? Check again

fmlblahblah 3

Wednesday 19 October 2011 9:56

I had an absses a while ago i couldn't walk. It sucks

blacknail3dfr3ak 3

Wednesday 19 October 2011 10:43

How do I post a picture lol sorry about the randomness

blacknail3dfr3ak 3

Wednesday 19 October 2011 10:55

Nevermind!!! Figured it out. Sorry about your thingy btw!

absolutegrrr 7

Wednesday 19 October 2011 15:24

This isn't Facebook, gtfo.

blacknail3dfr3ak 3

Wednesday 19 October 2011 17:10

Bite me :)

blacknail3dfr3ak 3

Wednesday 19 October 2011 10:59

Pshhh. I was a receptionist for three years.. Best. Job. Ever.

jellyD 1

Wednesday 19 October 2011 11:11

So get it lanced! Instant relief!

GiggityGiggityGo_fml 8

Wednesday 19 October 2011 11:27

Medical Mary j will sort it out... Might be hard in the reception tho...

perdix 29

Wednesday 19 October 2011 11:28

It was just so cheap and convenient to get your belly button pierced down at the gas station, wasn't it? Now, that's not looking like such a great idea after all. I don't know what your religion has to do with anything -- I'm not familiar with Receptionism. Is it like Scientology?

Cookie_box 6

Wednesday 19 October 2011 12:36

Hahaha that's the funniest commend I've ever read :)) Way to go! ^^^

missL1z 5

Wednesday 19 October 2011 11:54

Your umbilical cord just dropped off or something? How do you get abcess there?

Kiirst_mt1994 26

Wednesday 19 October 2011 11:59

take time off and get it sorted, but fyl

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The Top

Today, an absolute cretin of a lorry driver ran into the back of me as I was slowing down for an orange light about to go red. My car is totalled and he had the nerve to tell the police I had brake checked him on purpose, probably for an insurance scam, and that it was all my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 63

Today, after six months of doing the job of 2 people, because all my coworker does is sleep and sit down with her phone, I told my boss that I can't be doing my coworker's job and getting the same salary as her. My boss added just $10 to my salary and told me to let her carry on doing nothing, while I still do the work of 2 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 558

You deserved it 131

The Top

Today, I went into work. After three years of working 55 hours a week, they fired me by putting the contents of my locker at the front door, with a note that said "If not picked up by 10:00 am stuff will be donated." I work the night shift. I just lost three sweaters, two pairs of shoes, $60, and my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 550

You deserved it 2 738

Today, my mom is threatening to disinherit me because I won’t have a baby. I have three siblings who between them have seven kids for her to obsess over, yet she calls at least once a week and always tries to convince me to get pregnant. Fuck off mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 340

You deserved it 131

Today, I found out I need surgery for a hernia that blew up after working out. I’ve been working out constantly to keep my mind off of my ex, who was the right person at the wrong time, and now I can’t even do that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 854

You deserved it 130

Today, I was lying on the couch with my boyfriend and was feeling tired, so I got a soda. I sat back down and surprised him with a passionate kiss. I also surprised him when I suddenly burped right into his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 189

You deserved it 47 572

Today, at the store, I heard a kid complaining about getting braces. While I was saying 'thank you' and 'bye' to the cashier, his grandma must've seen my slightly crooked teeth. She pointed and said, "Without them, your teeth will look bad like that man's!" Everyone around looked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 684

You deserved it 4 581

Today, I was reading on a park bench not far from a grassy spot and a pond. A flock of geese landed on the grassy patch and began to eat some grass. I thought that I may be bothering the geese, but decided if I left them alone, they'd leave me alone as well. I was wrong. Geese are assholes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 248

You deserved it 1 085