Love: Today, I found out my boyfriend keeps a gun under his pillow....

By Anonymous - 03/06/2010 12:23 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my boyfriend keeps a gun under his pillow. This was only after my friends and I surprised him with his birthday cake while he was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 471

You deserved it 7 061

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Crime prevention

By Anonymous - 07/03/2022 18:00

Today, I found out my boyfriend keeps a sword under the bed, a proper sharp 'knight on horseback' sword instead of the typical baseball bat for burglars, I found this out after I was groping under there for a dropped earring and cut one of my fingers down to the bone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 984

You deserved it 178

By arace15336 - 22/08/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is only staying with me for the present I promised him for his birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 795

You deserved it 5 123

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 08/05/2021 03:59

Today, my husband excitedly came home from the gun show with a new lower receiver. I, however, had to go back out and get my own birthday cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 013

You deserved it 129

By aloneinaz - 15/01/2017 20:00

Today, while walking downstairs to go to work, I turned the corner and my boyfriend pulled a gun on me. Apparently, he forgot I was there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 733

You deserved it 844

By justlittleoldme - 12/03/2010 13:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up crying in the middle of a nightmare in which my boyfriend of 8 months shot me through the heart whilst laughing as I screamed 'I Love You'. After I told him about this, he took me into his arms as I cried, stroked my back and said, 'What kind of gun was it?' FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 866

You deserved it 7 304

By happybidet - 31/10/2016 13:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 721

You deserved it 881

By ilikecake - 29/05/2009 11:12 - United Arab Emirates

Today, it was my boyfriend's 24th birthday. His friends were throwing him a surprise party and I was in charge of getting his birthday cake. As a joke, I got it in the shape of a penis, with a graphic marzipan design. Funny, I never knew his overly-conservative parents were invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 386

You deserved it 53 426

Spooked

By Anonymous - 18/03/2021 08:01

Today, I found out that the loud "firecrackers" I heard the night before were actually shotgun blasts by my neighbor murdering his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 674

You deserved it 83

By fetch boy.. - 05/08/2013 05:28 - United States - Bellmore

Today, my boyfriend's parents found out we had a sleepover while they were on vacation. His dog had retrieved the underwear I had unknowingly left and brought them to his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 525

You deserved it 18 325

Wake up

By Anonymous - 24/06/2017 03:30 - India - Vijayawada

Today, it's my roommate's birthday. His friends were planning on a surprise birthday cake at midnight last night, and one of them told me about it, hoping to split the expense between us, which I was totally cool with. But I fell asleep before midnight and they didn't even bother to wake me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 486

You deserved it 1 032

Stefany713 0

Thursday 3 June 2010 19:22

be careful...don't cheat on him lol

MarkSeattle 0

Thursday 3 June 2010 19:24

how could you *not* know he keeps a gun under his pillow?

Comments

ColdGold 6

Thursday 3 June 2010 23:22

YDI for waking the man up.

EpicFail2 0

Thursday 3 June 2010 23:23

I used to put mine under the pillow but now I have a case that goes on my bed fram.

dinali 0

Thursday 3 June 2010 23:27

I'm too young to be able to legaly sleep with guns, but I sleep with six different knives, and keep at least one boot knife with me in public. good for him keeping a gun nearby.

buckfasthero 0

Friday 4 June 2010 7:06

Maybe one day you'll get to sleep with a woman.

Wookman17 4

Thursday 3 June 2010 23:27

F-in' ridiculous. You made my day. Thanks :)

Lisa89 3

Thursday 3 June 2010 23:32

So you broke into his flat while he was sleeping? Nice going...

Rickyretardo 0

Thursday 3 June 2010 23:49

I don't know why people think having weapons these days is wierd or the person is crazy back then it was normal and why not now? like jeez ppl stop being hippies

DeathShad0 1

Thursday 3 June 2010 23:51

I'm still trying to see where the FML is.

sameshitdifferen 0

Thursday 3 June 2010 23:51

What the **** did you do to make him put a GUN under his PILLOW?!?!?

Tadeusz_fml 5

Friday 4 June 2010 0:01

I wouldn't trust an American with a spoon, let alone a gun.

Lissita89 0

Friday 4 June 2010 1:14

Apparently you cannot read correctly. The person who posted this FML is from the UK.

The__Redneck 7

Friday 4 June 2010 4:52

Next time they're facing some yagoff in Europe they appeased for a few years, we should consider how much they fear Americans with guns... And send a few tons of spoons instead.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Friday 4 June 2010 5:38

^ I confess, though this is completely ridiculous and I don't share these views, I lol'ed :)

Tadeusz_fml 5

Friday 4 June 2010 13:19

I meant to post this in response to someone who was extolling the virtues of the second ammendment...my point is that legal gun ownership is just ridiculously stupid. Also, yagoff? What's a yagoff? If you're referring to World War Two then 'next time' you send over those men with guns, come, say, three or four years earlier so we don't have to fight on four continents all by ourselves for 3 years.