By Anonymous - 05/05/2012 11:44 - United States

Today, I got tasered by a cop. It was his second day on the job. My crime? Sneezing during a sobriety test. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 898
You deserved it 2 476
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Top comments

The_Hitdude 12

Cop: I'm gonna need you to walk on the line, son. OP: Sir, I swear I'm not dru--ATCHOO! Cop: We've got a fighter! *Zap Zap* This is how most cops behave anyway. I see a promotion in his future.

248 16
bobbeta30 14

My dad once saw a naked man with a spear running around a park get tazed.

205 5

Comments

DocBastard 38

You're probably the type of moron who would say "Douchebag!" under his hand while he fake-sneezed. Sounds like it was well deserved.

Nutty4Muffs 3

I'm sorry Doc, but where did it say anything in the post to give you that idea?

39 6
CaramelMacchiato 13

^ OR, I dunno, (and I'm just taking a lucky guess here), they thumbed Doc down because they didn't like his comment?

30 4
DocBastard 38

*shrug* I guess everyone's sarcasmometers weren't turned in this morning. Oh well.

28 34
Kenton1008 21

64, it's hard to tell if someone's being sarcastic over the internet.

19 5
DocBastard 38

If I'm making a comment, chances are good that it's sarcastic. Except for this one. Maybe.

34 5
CaramelMacchiato 13

80 - I think the Internet needs a sarcastic font. It's alright, Doc! I think a fair amount of people understood your sarcasm.

11 2
onlychildFTW 33

I thought doc's comment was funny. But I guess I just have a sense of humor. And i can understand sarcasm. And I think Doc's comments are always either serious or funny. This time = funny.

6 2
perdix 29

Were you charged with Assault with a Deadly Loogie? That is, after you were charged with 50,000 volts.

47 5
j_cat187 19

It's not the volts that get you, it's the amps.

4 1
nadnerbz 6

I would've been shocked if that happened to me

40 2
mikeymayhem_87 15

Just be glad his trigger finger wasn't itchin'. FYL anyways, OP

5 2
Zomg_Okay 26

His trigger finger was itching. The taser didn't fire itself, you know.

12 1
egc573 40

Always be wary of the newly-hired cops. The old guys are usually much more lenient and only get involved when it's reasonably required. But the young bucks? They'll stop you for any incredibly minor violation. Or, you know, shock you for sneezing. (Either that, or he's got a REALLY painful way of saying, "Bless you.")

21 3
FishHead 6

or new cops are nervous and jumpy. the OP probably scared him with a random sneeze and the cop tazed him out of fright and immedite response. still the cop should be disaplined

0 6
LunaDragon 10

Seriously Aquaa? you don't watch the news or read the newspaper. Google the phrase "don't tase me bro" I'm sure it will be an enlightening experience, It was the taze that shocked the world!

33 7
jwebster 8

Sue. Then cop gets fired and has to work at burger king where he belongs.

17 3