By RC3Welly - 09/03/2012 22:58 - United States

Spicy
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks 776
You deserved it 1 824

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Pull out method doesn't work. You're ****** for life.

Comments

ElsBells 0

As for the pulling out debate, if it's done in time, the only thing that can get the chick pregnant is pre-cum. And -correct me if I'm wrong- pre-cum can only enduce pregnancy when there's sperm left over from the last ejaculation in the penis. Leftover sperm exits the body when the guy urinates. So, basically, if the guy has peed since he last ejaculated and he pulls out IN TIME, it's pretty damn effective. That's your sex ed lesson of the day. But yeah, there's the whole STD thing. STDs are often not noticeable. Like herpes. It can still be spread even when no signs or symptoms are present in the host! I hope she's not pregnant, because let's face it, you're no parent of the year in the making...But I hope you get herpes. For being stupid. =] haha..jk? But in the future...don't be a fool, wrap your tool. Kthanks.

LMFAO!! "Be my baby's daddy!" Hahaha I have been yelling that for days! That is just so great. A new pick up line LMFAO!! jk

FallenAngel209 0

Wow, I gotta say it's a YDI. Next time don't have drunken sex with some girl you don't know at all. Who knows what STD's she had let alone the pregnant issue. Ew...

hope things work out in ur favor. but i hope you've learned you lesson

yes THANK YOU #191 everyone that thinks hes stupid for having drunk sex is just jealous they never had the chance to do it themselves. its not his fault shes psychoooooOoooOoOo

rebecca_fml 0

HAHAHA this is one of the best FMLs i've ever read. hah wow.

Shadow_Sniper 0

haha even though you completely deserved it, its still hilarious

babygrl_13 0

Dude do you not listen to people when they say stuff like: "Don't be silly, Wrap your willy!" "Don't be a fool, wrap your tool!" "No glove, no love." "Wrap it before you tap it." "Cover your bump before you hump." "Don't be a dick, cover your stick.".....? Yeah, there's a reason they say it! but hey, happy early Father's Day, you just earned the Father of the Year award! Hope it was worth one drunken night of stupidity!

i woulda yell, " I have HERPES!!!" think fast buddy

Jarhead_fml 0

Skip Town.... Never return lmao