Miscellaneous: Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the...

By blehh - 14/04/2009 20:40 - United States

Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 293

You deserved it 54 669

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Full of it

By romoangel - 21/04/2020 05:00

Today, I felt a very sharp pain, like my appendix was going to burst. After going to the doctor, I was rushed to the hospital to get tests done. The doctors later told me there's nothing wrong, I was just constipated. I went to the hospital for them to basically tell me I'm full of shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 516

You deserved it 563

By fulloshit - 28/11/2010 02:17 - United States

Today, I woke up with extreme stomach pains. After being rushed to the hospital and having numerous tests performed, I was told my intestines were over-stretched with stool. I'm essentially so full of shit it hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 070

You deserved it 4 597

Estoy Poopin

By Anonymous - 08/05/2018 07:00 - United States - Fort Collins

Today, I cracked my back while pooping at work. It was so bad I had to go to the hospital and get carried out of the toilet by paramedics. A $4,000 bill later, my coworkers will not shut up about how funny it is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 158

You deserved it 542

Healthy lifestyle tips

By middleagednurse - 04/10/2017 23:37

Today, I spent 5 hours in the emergency room for what I thought was heavy bloody diarrhea. After having various implements and doctors' fingers shoved up my ass, it turns out I was only shitting out the family-sized bag of red spicy cheese curls I had eaten for lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 583

You deserved it 4 121

By CrappyLuck - 04/08/2011 02:43 - United States

Today, I took my 8 month-old to Urgent Care due to extreme constipation. I spent $25 for my son to poop on me the second the doctor had me remove his diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 824

You deserved it 4 266

What is happening to me?

By Anonymous - 14/10/2022 22:00

Today, my son was up at 3:00 am crying due to excruciatingly severe pain in his groin. I took him to the ER. After nine hours consisting of two different hospitals, an ambulance ride, a CAT scan, an ultrasound, and possible appendicitis, the surgeon finally said he was just constipated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 975

You deserved it 137

By CantPoop - 13/07/2018 08:00 - United States - Springdale

Today, I was telling my wife how being told to drink water all day when you're not even thirsty is "such a scam". Suddenly, I felt an excruciating pain in my abdomen. The ER had to give me IV fluids because I was so constipated from dehydration. The bill was over $2000. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 465

You deserved it 7 164

I've known for ages

By Crap - 28/01/2010 05:01 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 081

You deserved it 7 183

Nice.

By poururheartout - 27/07/2018 20:30

Today, I went to the ER as I have an ulcer and I was exhibiting signs of a perforation. This is when the gorgeous doctor told me he had to stick his finger up my butt to check for rectal bleeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 279

You deserved it 398

By Anonymous - 12/04/2015 15:42 - Belgium

Today, what started with me forcing a shit a little too hard ended up with me being rushed to the hospital with appendicitis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 517

You deserved it 2 901

Lobster_fml 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 1:52

That's your fault. Wouldn't you know that you are constipated?

craigahh 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 2:04

That's why you should live in Canada.

Comments

skiesofgreen 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 3:29

This is why you should live in a country where they don't make you pay to stay healthy. As for the people saying he should have taken a crap, if he was constipated he wouldn't have been able too... he might just have assumed the the fact nothing was moving meant he didn't need to go rather than that he COULDN'T go.

Osakhomen 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 3:25

My comment was deleted! WTF As I said before: Would you rather it been something more serious? I don't see how it's FML at all, and not really a YDI...

skiesofgreen 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 3:41

#56 I agree our healthcare system generally speaking sucks (it does vary a little from province to province so I can't really speak for the country as a whole) but there are plenty of countries that are both free and efficient, not to mention I'd rather find some other way to regulate unnecessary hospital trips than leaving people in a situation where they can't get the treatment they desperately need... anyone want to move to Europe with me? preferably somewhere warm and sunny?

raabhimself 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 3:30

#44, it's not necessarily the OP's fault that they live in America, or wherever they could be posting from. You actually sound more or less like a prick, by saying its one countries fault for not having free health care. I think its great, but keep in mind people abuse it, and the tax payer suffers.. In some ways the american system works better, weeds out the annoying ones that bitch about every little sniffle, but its also bad because those who actually need help can't get it.. There's no win win.. But still Canada's free health care blows, and that comes from a fellow canadian

curryndricegirll 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 3:30

Haha. I had the same thing happen to me. But they usually give you laxatives or something so that you're not constipated anymore. They tested the feces as well or something. Of course, I was only six years old at that time. I also don't think it was that expensive when they did it.