Work: Today, I had to be an observer for a drug test at work. Me and...

By evomadrid24 - 02/06/2011 02:48 - United States

Today, I had to be an observer for a drug test at work. Me and two others got to watch 130 guys take a piss, and then leave work two hours later than everyone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 180

You deserved it 2 799

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 05/04/2014 23:16 - United States - Windsor Heights

Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 411

You deserved it 6 445

Just Say Yes

By bringthemback - 29/03/2014 10:34 - United States - Columbia

Today, my boss decided to have the whole staff drug tested and fire everyone who failed. Out of an original staff of 14 people, only my boss, two coworkers and I remain. I now have four times my normal workload and am seriously thinking maybe I should've said "Yes" to drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 113

You deserved it 4 257

By xharmonyx - 24/04/2012 08:29 - United States

Today, I paid for someone else's piss so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 760

You deserved it 71 092

By dragynfyre - 06/03/2012 05:37 - United States

Today, my boss called me out for a drug test. His reason was because my eyes are puffy and bloodshot, making me look high. I've been suffering from allergies all week, but still had to pee in a cup in front of a complete stranger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 906

You deserved it 2 130

By overflowing - 16/04/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 195

You deserved it 8 671

By Anonymous - 10/06/2016 17:02 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to take a drug test for my new job, which I desperately need and which took me over a year to land. I got a shy bladder and couldn't pee. They marked me as non-compliant and revoked the job offer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 708

You deserved it 1 317

Are you taking the piss?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2019 14:00

Today, I was being drug tested as part of a pre-employment policy for substitute teaching. Once I had peed in the cup enough to pass the line, I put it on the only available space: the toilet paper holder. Trying to get toilet paper, I knocked the cup over, spilling pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 913

Never trust a cookie

By Anonymous - 06/01/2022 14:01

Today, I'm a proud non drug user, but I trusted an oat cookie at my brother's birthday, which was loaded with pot. Tomorrow is our mandatory drug screening at work, my job is government based, and I worked my ass off to get it. Anyone who tests positive or misses the test is sacked immediately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 628

You deserved it 185

By heck - 12/08/2016 13:57

Today, I took a drug test. Not only did I fail the drug test, but I mostly missed the sample cup and got urine all over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 153

You deserved it 18 520

By urinanalysis - 03/12/2009 16:08 - Canada

Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 365

You deserved it 7 313

CallMeHush 0

Thursday 2 June 2011 9:02

Why 2 hours later? Did you need time for your erection to go down?

frozenfreeze 5

Thursday 2 June 2011 9:21

It could have been worse. You could have had to pee while 130 guys were watching you.

Comments

reggicm 0

Friday 3 June 2011 0:12

I had to pee in front of someone for my military physical...trust me, it's not fun for the other people either.

jlperry31 10

Friday 3 June 2011 4:26

how did u get that job. I would love to watch men take a Piss. I bet u only got to stand behind didn't u. not really watch them p

jlperry31 10

Friday 3 June 2011 4:29

usually at a piss test u don't actually watch them in the front side to p. unless ur on drug watch or maybe at cause they can do what they want to u. I want to watch guys Pisa. where do I sign up

BeachSurfer94 0

Friday 3 June 2011 4:31

hahaha see it's funny because I was one of the guys pissing in the cup

jerzboi13 0

Friday 3 June 2011 4:48

ur all dumb he's prally in the army, meat gazing is part of being a nco

Got_any_grapes1 4

Friday 3 June 2011 5:54

Not to be a grammar freak, but it is "I and two others got to...." You wouldn't say "me got to..." You are welcome for your mini lesson of the day (:

tacoman007 2

Friday 3 June 2011 6:24

I hate to interrupt the lesson, but I always comes after the other subjects used in the sentence. So, really, you're sentence should look like, "two others and I got to..." If you're going to be a douche at least act like you know what you're talking about.

jessranga 0

Friday 3 June 2011 6:37

I'm a mine site nurse and I drug test for a living. start complaining when a 400 pound man throws a cup full of urine at you because he showed up positive for crack.

richcranium 0

Saturday 4 June 2011 7:47

sounds like military you had a hundred percent test and you had to be **** watch that sucks for you

Magnimus 4

Saturday 4 June 2011 14:56

I would tell my boss that if he wants me to watch a bunch of ppl pissing, I quit, bcause that's not in my fraking job description. And he can shove that job where the sun don't shine.