Miscellaneous: Today, I had to meet with my landlord to organise when he was...

By Robbins - 31/08/2009 02:51 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to meet with my landlord to organise when he was coming to look at my flat and decide whether I get my deposit back. In the time it took to see him, my friend drank a bottle of vodka and vomited all over my room and knocked the window through. My landlord is coming in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 710

You deserved it 5 396

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 12/03/2010 16:55 - United Kingdom

Today, while celebrating at my friend's birthday party, I fell down a flight of stairs, got into a fight with my flatmate, and ruined my friend's outfit after drinking too much. I'm expecting I'll need to find a new place to live tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 676

You deserved it 32 166

By pukeytimes - 10/04/2015 23:03 - Australia - Leichhardt

Today, I decided to do a good bit of spring cleaning. When my apartment was finally spotless I went to lie down. I woke up later to find my drunk flatmate passed out in a puddle of her own puke on the living room's carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 842

You deserved it 2 260

Bad timing

By Homeless? - 07/11/2016 11:07 - United Kingdom - Gloucester

Today, I have been vomiting for 4 days. Tomorrow, my landlord is insisting on inspecting my flat. I now either have to clean my house whilst trying not to throw up all around it, or fail my inspection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 172

You deserved it 1 253

College life

By Anonymous - 01/11/2009 11:33 - Germany

Today, I arrived in my dorm at 3 am to find my roommate passed out and a nauseating stench. While I was gone, he got drunk and puked all over the walls, carpet, and both beds. His inebriated attempt to clean up the mess consisted of smearing his vomit everywhere with my shower robe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 990

You deserved it 2 363

By theRoomie - 02/11/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, my loser roommate got wasted. He comes to me before going to bed, tells me he loves me, tries to hug me, then explosively vomits all over my face, my hair, my clothes. Then spends the rest of the night retching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 820

You deserved it 2 839

You need to leave

By trash your own house!! - 09/09/2023 06:00

Today, my friend found out his girlfriend was cheating on him. He came to talk to me, and I was happy to help him through this tough time… until he drank a bottle of whiskey by himself. He flew into a drunken rage and started punching holes in the wall and throwing furniture. Now my house is wrecked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 105

By Authentik8 - 16/09/2011 22:10 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that one of my university flatmates arrived early for Freshers Week, and had a party which involved the place being trashed. I'm going to lose some of my deposit for damage caused before I even arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 911

You deserved it 2 231

By uvagirl - 05/07/2013 01:32 - United States

Today, I came back to my apartment after moving most of my stuff out. Upon returning, I learned that my now ex-roommate drank all of my alcohol and threw away my things, thinking that I had forgotten them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 284

You deserved it 3 848

Painful

By stupid drunk bitch - 24/02/2016 18:37 - United States - Cobleskill

Today, my roommate made out with this guy I kind of had a thing for. It wasn't a big deal to sober me, but drunk me wasn't having it. I drank half a bottle of vodka, punched a hole in a wall, and cried while laying on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 535

You deserved it 5 504

Gross, dudes!

By notsick - 17/03/2019 22:00

Today, my roommate invited her brother over to drink. Neither can handle their drink and her brother is a sympathy spewer. He’s not my guest but I had to clean up vomit until 4 in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 134

You deserved it 214

reklamfox 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:25

Why are you friends with someone so horrible? Anyone who would do something so selfish and stupid is not a friend, they are just a jerk. It sucks that is happened to you, but maybe you should get different friends.

sublime93 0

Monday 31 August 2009 14:05

I'm sorry fender, but you're 'stories' are not funny nor creative.

Comments

Casualt1234 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:17

may i say that FIRST impressions are everything?

Tobe_fml 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:24

I see what you did there Casualt1234 ;D

judgeymcjudge 0

Monday 31 August 2009 10:42

Or FML could just move my comment to a totally random spot... WTF?

FenderYK 0

Monday 31 August 2009 11:31

This FML totally sounds like the time I went to the bathroom of Carl's Junior. It was a Monday afternoon and we were driving on the freeway. I needed to use the restroom so I asked my mother to stop anywhere so I can defecate in the most comfortable way. Than I don't know if it was a gift from god or what, but there was a Carl's Junior in front of us. So my mom parked the car and I went to the bathroom :)

sublime93 0

Monday 31 August 2009 14:05

I'm sorry fender, but you're 'stories' are not funny nor creative.

the_stereotype 0

Monday 31 August 2009 17:28

haha, #1, you're awesome

xKuraixMitsukaix 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:17

Damn. You could get your roommate to clean that up. FYL.

xKuraixMitsukaix 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:18

Tell your friend to clean that shit up and pay for the window or w/e. Sucks man. FYL.

darren824 0

Monday 31 August 2009 19:48

ydi because you are on this site and not cleaning up.

xKuraixMitsukaix 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 19:22

It's OP's friend's fault though.

FMLable 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:19

wave byebye to that spare cash.

andagi2010 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:19

YDI for having friends.

reset_button 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:31

No, he deserves it for having stupid friends

reklamfox 0

Monday 31 August 2009 9:25

thesunshotme 0

Monday 31 August 2009 22:35

36: Time it takes to post an FML: less than a minute. It doesn't really make a difference. Now, go ahead and call me a *****/dick if it satisfies your little head.