Health: Today, I have the flu, food poisoning, and I'm on my period....

By SickSmick - 09/02/2010 12:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning, and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 592

You deserved it 3 492

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Same thing different taste

By Duchess - 20/01/2017 12:00

Today, I found out I have a yeast infection, a bladder infection, and a urinary tract infection all at the same time. Oh, and I also have the flu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 512

You deserved it 717

By Lolly - 12/09/2018 23:30

Today, I have a UTI that spread to my kidneys, a yeast infection, and a herpes outbreak. Oh, and my period came this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 288

You deserved it 831

By Will - 21/02/2010 05:05 - France

Today, I had food poisoning. I spent all day on the can. I also had a bucket to throw up into at the same time. I was sick out of both ends, at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 207

You deserved it 2 769

By Jobby - 30/06/2012 12:48

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 771

You deserved it 2 715

States of matter

By Nirah - 26/07/2019 21:00 - Canada - Parksville

Today, I'm a week into a prescription of extremely constipating antibiotics. I also just caught the stomach bug going around at work that causes aggressive diarrhea. The two combined mean I have a constant, slow-moving stream of thick, foul-smelling sludge coming out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 050

You deserved it 167

Good times, bad times

By st3phani3b - 26/11/2018 09:30 - United States - Fort Wayne

Today, I'm stuck at home waiting on a plumber to come fix the flooding in my basement. The flooding happens when any sink, shower, or toilet in the house is used. Today is also the day that I started my period. Without water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 718

You deserved it 224

By cmoney6452 - 01/03/2012 16:17 - United States

Today, I'm so sick that I'm drinking fluids just to make it hurt less when I puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 193

You deserved it 2 516

By Anonymous - 26/10/2015 04:42

Today, after finishing a bottle and a half of pure cranberry juice to flush my bladder for a possible infection, I've been spewing liquid shits all day, my asshole burns and it hurts to sit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 545

You deserved it 5 753

Plumbing issues

By Anonymous - 27/08/2021 04:01 - Denmark - Viby

Today, I'm constipated AND having diarrhea at the same time. It feels like I'm going to explode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 75

By shroooms - 28/07/2011 20:37 - Slovenia

Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 728

You deserved it 3 074

sucksforyoudude 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 16:02

sucks for you babe, get to feelin better

lolcatsyo 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 16:02

I recommend an apple a day.

Comments

justanotherhuman 21

Wednesday 10 February 2010 8:07

...nothing fancy, or witty here. FYL. Truly... FYL.

hershey098 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 8:45

I like to Jack off to this fml

ukiba 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 8:50

thanks for sharing

Hugorgy 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 10:32

You at least know your period will end in about a week.

sonosaeterno 2

Wednesday 10 February 2010 11:08

hope you feel better soon! :)

paulson0730 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:43

that's nasty

laurenthebrutal 2

Wednesday 10 February 2010 14:04

been there had that it sucks

BuzzSurf90 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 14:20

yeah ummm... TMI.

Everton93 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 16:18

that's disgusting...

Nubcake67 4

Wednesday 10 February 2010 16:29

I see that the fates are against you today. Hope you feel better!

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The Top

Today, my hateful mother-in-law showed up unexpectedly. I faked taking a phone call so the bitter old hag would leave me alone. She then pulled out her phone, called my number, and glared at me as my phone rang against my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 723

You deserved it 13 099

Today, I'm finally dating the girl I've been fawning over for years. So what do I do? I accidentally called her by her sister's name during a conversation, which might seem like a small mistake, except I used to sleep with her sister, and she's been having a hard time getting over it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 754

You deserved it 3 687

The Top

Today, I reached into my pocket and found my mom's car keys. I'm a four hour drive away, and she obviously can't come to pick them up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 704

You deserved it 7 361

Today, I was driving my best friend home when he admitted to being gay. I was glad he could trust me with a secret like this. Until he admitted to having sex with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 704

You deserved it 207

Today, I went on a date for the first time in almost a year. To keep things casual, he had a couple of his friends join. Oh and by a couple of friends, I mean a party of people from his church. I'm not religious. The date wasn't even half over before I was being preached to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 183

You deserved it 289

Today, in the midst of sleep, my boyfriend hurled my cellphone across the room and into the wall because he couldn't be bothered to pick up or hang up an incoming call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 453

You deserved it 3 341

Today, after three weeks of my boss telling me how much he appreciates my hard work and has submitted my name up for a promotion, he called me into his office to announce I'm being laid off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 157

You deserved it 2 350

Today, I discovered that my boss listens to the things we say about him on the audio-enabled cameras at our work. I'm thus currently jobless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 087

You deserved it 40 689

Same thing different taste

States of matter

Good times, bad times

Plumbing issues

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