Animals: Today, I learned that my hairdo must look like a rat. I found...

By inpain - 02/12/2011 05:14 - United States

Today, I learned that my hairdo must look like a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 952

You deserved it 6 206

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Same thing different taste

Strange noise

By Anonymous - 22/01/2020 18:00

Today, I was awoken at 1:30am by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 793

You deserved it 223

By CA19oo - 20/03/2012 01:03 - United States - Buford

Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 748

You deserved it 2 078

By MakeItMaaco - 11/07/2011 17:56 - United States

Today, I saw a Red Tailed Hawk land on my car and spend a few minutes looking at his reflection in the windshield. This was all really neat until I found out he badly scratched my hood with his large talons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 932

You deserved it 3 769

By Fran - 09/01/2010 08:40 - New Zealand

Today, I was awoken at 1:30 a.m. by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 519

You deserved it 3 372

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 21:58 - United Kingdom

Today, I was shaving my underarms, when I heard a noise. I quickly turned my head to see what it was and got the razor caught in my hair. I'm now sporting a very attractive bald patch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 860

You deserved it 8 410

Polly Want a Wax

By Baldy - 07/09/2017 13:00

Today, I was using pre-waxed strips to wax my eyebrows when my parrot investigated by walking through them. He then screamed, flew into my hair, thrashed around, and got stuck. I now have two bald spots and two parrot bites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 699

You deserved it 656

By umyuck - 03/05/2015 16:55 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I noticed my shower drain wasn't draining well. I cleaned it out, thinking it was just a rat's nest of hair. Wrong. It was an actual dead rat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 499

You deserved it 2 518

By Larz - 26/01/2011 21:49 - Canada

Today, I woke up to a pile of hair on my floor. I looked in the mirror and realized the hair was from my head. I had a dream about cutting my hair and I guess it came true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 980

You deserved it 3 669

By anonamous - 17/07/2009 16:59 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose so I would have to cut off the ponytail that I've been growing since '99. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 231

You deserved it 96 729

By Single and wigless - 14/04/2019 04:00

Today, I was on a FaceTime call with a guy I like and my cat, out of nowhere, attacks my head and snatches my wig off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 143

You deserved it 871

Buttsexpirate 9

Friday 2 December 2011 12:17

I would like to believe that the eagle screamed "Caw muthafucka Caw!" as he swooped down.

nephilim241 19

Friday 2 December 2011 13:03

My hairdo brings all the hawks to the yard and they're like CAWWWW *swoop*

Comments

Okayitwasme 0

Saturday 3 December 2011 16:34

Like, I feel really sorry for you! Not!!!! Some of us don't live near a beach, but have 3 feet of snow and -20! I take it your blond and have hair like a rat! YDI oh ya, I have to shovel snow right now in -20 in the dark, on my day off! Yes I'm jealous and need crackers and cheese for my wine!

scrework 6

Monday 5 December 2011 3:56

HILARIOUS!!! XD

sodapopper 6

Monday 5 December 2011 4:39

Prego it's in there!!

pastnastificatio 4

Monday 5 December 2011 8:07

Well, if it looks like a rat, and it smells like a rat, it must be a rat

cld_91 4

Wednesday 7 December 2011 4:54

That's like AFV worthy XD lol

DrasticDunce 1

Wednesday 21 December 2011 19:40

Maybe it looked like a female hawk, in mating season...

ACTriple3 5

Tuesday 3 January 2012 1:23

You must have nice "hare"!!! :D

ACTriple3 5

Tuesday 3 January 2012 1:25

I really hope someone understands my joke... Else it would be a FML for me.

Celeste0693 0

Monday 9 January 2012 18:38

if a hawk swooped down how you say he did your hair probably resembles a dead rodent not a cat... i would advise changing your hair style and pretty much everything about it.