Money: Today, I learned the true meaning of "throwing money down the...

By GrumpyBunny - 28/03/2016 07:27 - United States - Marysville

Today, I learned the true meaning of "throwing money down the toilet" when pulling my pants up, somehow my $100 Easter money fell out of my pocket mid flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 997

You deserved it 4 456

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/07/2016 13:45 - Maldives

Today, while using the bathroom I gave the toilet a courtesy flush, only for it to overflow and soak my pants. That would've been bad enough even if I hadn't been at work, with five hours left on my shift and no change of clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 298

You deserved it 1 076

By PeedMom - 16/03/2018 09:00 - United States - Cedar Bluff

Today, I had to pee really badly. I rushed to the bathroom, pulled down my pants, and sat on the toilet. After a few seconds of peeing, I realized I had only pulled down my pants. Not my underpants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 021

You deserved it 1 851

By Anonymous - 19/11/2012 21:08 - United States - Nutley

Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 664

You deserved it 6 158

By Pimaan - 26/10/2011 16:14 - United States

Today, I decided to be a generous guy and slip a dollar from my pocket to a beggar. Turns out I'd slipped my hard-earned $100 bill instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 744

You deserved it 35 927

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 034

You deserved it 2 798

By Lostring - 02/07/2018 20:30

Today, I was fiddling with a ring my aunt hand made me, accidentally slipping it off, and dropped it in the toilet. Like an idiot, I scrambled to get it out only for my bending over to activate the automatic flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 136

You deserved it 994

By ripped - 11/04/2009 06:10 - Canada

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 240

You deserved it 63 918

By pantydropper - 17/04/2013 19:01 - United States

Today, I grabbed a pair of pants from the dryer in a hurry, trying to make it to the bank. When I rushed in, I felt something fall down my leg. It was a pair of my mom's granny panties that had been stuck inside my jeans. I kicked them aside, hoping no one would notice. They did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 388

You deserved it 10 682

By highleyj - 01/04/2009 08:16 - United States

Today, I ran to a public bathroom because of explosive diarrhea. In the middle of it, I noticed there was no more toilet paper nor paper towels remaining. The smallest bill in my wallet was a 5. I had to pay 10 dollars to wipe my own butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 284

You deserved it 19 935

By Anonymous - 24/10/2009 02:25 - United States

Today, I was changing my shirt in the bathroom when I dropped it. It fell on my foot, so I decided to flip it up with my foot instead of bending down to get it. I flipped it, and it landed in the toilet. Which somebody had not flushed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 347

You deserved it 35 660

imnotc00l 10

Monday 28 March 2016 22:23

I wish I got 100$ for Easter.

PackardBell_fml 19

Monday 28 March 2016 22:21

Try and use your front pocket first. Sorry bout that op

Comments

ChippyChoppy 21

Tuesday 29 March 2016 15:45

Money for Easter? What?

Marcus55125 7

Tuesday 29 March 2016 16:25

Karma must've had you tagged. haha

kelzo33 7

Tuesday 29 March 2016 18:11

Why wasn't the seat down?

ExterminatorRex 4

Tuesday 29 March 2016 18:50

Sounds like you didn't have an eggcellent easter

sureshadow 23

Tuesday 29 March 2016 18:56

A front pocket will work wonders.

_lifemyfuck_ 11

Tuesday 29 March 2016 20:32

That's happened to me before so now I'm paranoid and I take everything out of my back pocket and hold them while using the bathroom (x

devil_hawk99 3

Tuesday 29 March 2016 22:26

Today, I opened the top of my convertible. On the highway I watched the wind scoop out 75$ of this months tip money out onto the highway. FML

armattiuzzo 16

Tuesday 29 March 2016 22:53

I always thought the quote was "flushing money down the toilet" nit throwing... Im being completely serious. No joke

biopilot17 9

Tuesday 29 March 2016 23:18

Some sewer worker is gonna be glad he works with shit in a while

itzzzzz_alpop 12

Thursday 31 March 2016 4:47

Sorry for your loss, OP. Maybe in the future you will empty your pockets before you go!

Keywords

Food Toxic Miscellaneous Family Gross Valentine's Day Love Health Home improvement Homeowners Awkward Drugs Kids Babysitter Music Lonely Crush Wanker Intimacy Relatable Cats Animals Work Coworkers Airplanes Transportation Sleep Embarrassing Mental health Cute

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Today, my girlfriend's mother called her in the bedroom for a serious talk. I overheard them arguing and yelling at each other. It turns out her mother found a condom next to her garbage. We got caught because her cat swallowed the condom and threw it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 639

You deserved it 20 677

Today, my sister asked me if "the worst comes to the worst" she could come and live with me here in the UK. She's in the US, and due to all the shit that's going on over there, her health insurance and job security are on the line. Weirdly, all her "yeehaw MAGA" posts have disappeared from her socials. I wonder why… FML

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You deserved it 144

The Top

Today, my family had an argument with me because I bought the wrong kind of cheese. They never said what kind they wanted. The argument ended with my mother saying that she wished she could kill herself, because of how horrible of a person I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 166

You deserved it 107

Today, I was going at it with my boyfriend when he asked what nickname I wanted to be called. I told him to make something up. A few seconds later, he called me Buzz Lightyear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 496

Today, I was at Target buying four coloring books. As I was in line, the woman behind me said that buying coloring books was a good idea to keep my kids occupied. I smiled and said that it would give me a few minutes to relax. I'm a 26 year-old guy with no kids. The coloring books were for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 648

You deserved it 37 198

Today, I got locked out of a building that I work in (I work night shifts). I locked my phone, wallet, and car keys in the building. I had no way of contacting my boss or getting a ride. I had to walk home at night, almost got hit by a car full of dudes yelling slurs, and had a woman scream at me from the passenger seat of a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 966

You deserved it 217

Today, I read a book by a former client who did time for fraud. She swears she's innocent, and blames everyone for her "ordeal": the police, court, judge, and me, her own attorney. She conveniently forgot to mention her two full confessions, one of which was given before the judge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 345

You deserved it 3 461

Today, I was out walking downtown. A woman walking behind the thought that my pants were hanging too low. She came over to me and yanked my pants up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 2 510

Same thing different taste

Fast and Furious

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