By Nick - 29/06/2012 21:39 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML
I agree, your life sucks 26 279
You deserved it 6 727

Same thing different taste

Top comments

That's going in your son's suppressed memory

Comments

How old is she? Is it possible that she doesn't know what testicles look like?....which would be a good thing?

If she can 'show up later with a cake' I'm guessing she has a license, so she probably knows what it is.

insertnameherr 11

or she made it in the kitchen and showed to the father in another room.

Alternatively, she could have also gotten a ride. Personally I'd be happy if my daughter had no idea what ****+balls looked like at a young age.

French_Toast_fml 3

Sounds like a ****-and-ball story.

She's a moron because she played a harmless practical joke on her brother who's too young to get it? And who calls his own kid a name like that? What the hell is wrong with you? The only moron here is the one who takes life too seriously, calls his daughter a moron for no reason, and has no ******* sense of humour.

What if a kid at the party understood the joke? You never know nowadays. Though it is harmless, obviously OP doesn't like the type of humor, especially around little kids. Also, that doesn't mean OP doesn't have a sense of humor, it means he doesn't think those types of jokes are funny. Every parent handles things differently with their kids.

For shame, Doc. We all know while you were writing this, you had another window open taking notes for your children's next birthday. What will your son think when he turns 16 an looks back at family photos? "****, I love my dad." You sneaky Bastard. ;)

And to the rest of the people above an inevitably below: Some people need to either get off of their high horses or take the rods out of their asses. It was a harmless joke. I'm sure if the FML was 'Today, as a joke, I made a penis cake for my brother's birthday. My dad berated me for "being an idiot", and now I'm grounded. FML' THEN you guys would be calling the dad uptight. I swear, it's like there was a Great Migration of 'holier than thou's' to FML recently.

Don't worry, I'm not going to argue with you. This isn't a fan thing; I just agree with him. I'm not trying to pretend I'm buddies with Doc- he doesn't even know who the **** I am. Again, a joke. There are times when I've disagreed with him, and I'm sure there still will be. That is all; enjoy your evening. Side note: I like how if you agree with/ defend a popular FMLer, you're suddenly a fanboy.

As for the cake, she decorated it as a rocket. So the chances of anyone recognising it or being offended is low. My biggest problem is that he called his daughter a moron. That's a terrible thing for a father to do. That's not holier-than-thou, it's just common decency.

Doc, Woah. Slow down buddy. No sense of humor? Hmm maybe the remark where he said, "I can't believe my balls spawned this moron" ...hmm just maybe, that was "humorous" from his point of view. You cannot read someone's expression through writing all the time. I took it as he was joking. My father has called me a moron when I did something "dumb" as a kid that I thought was funny. I've heard all kinds of names from him; maggot, dumbass, I was an accident... & they were all in a joking ass manner, because that's how my dad and I are with each other. We have a brutal sense of humor. I bet OP even laughed this off before writing this FML and then shook his head while calling her a moron. I believe you are the one taking things too seriously.....everyone has a different sense of humor and how they go about it, lay off a bit?

Because I'm calling an adult, not a child, a moron. That's the difference. I just can't imagine calling my children stupid, moron, maggot...I suppose my parenting style is just different. Calling your child a moron isn't good parenting. Maybe I'm over-reacting, but in my opinion you never speak to (or about) your children that way.

unknown_user5566 26

I have to agree with Doc on the bit about OP calling his daughter a moron. If he really laughed about the situation prior to posting this FML as some of you have suggested, I don't think he would call her a moron for baking that cake. If OP doesn't have the kind of humor that goes along with penis-shaped cakes, that's fine. However in no situation is it fine to refer to your child as a "moron". I talk to the parents of some of my students who call their kids "retarded", "idiotic", "lazy", "slow", and even "worthless"; it makes me sick to my stomach. In a harmless situation such as this, it is totally uncalled for to degrade your child like that.

24/29 and whatever other numbers you are - you need to remove your lips from Docs ass, it's having side effects of bad judgement calls... A dick cake is in no way appropriate for a 5 year olds birthday cake... It is also in no way humorous for a 5 year olds birthday party... A 80 year old or even a middle aged woman - yes... A young boy - no.... Though I agree he shouldn't have called her a moron... He should have bitch slapped her and said "haha it's okay I at least made it look like you're wearing blush!

I agree, a dick cake is inappropriate. But she decorated it to look like a rocket, so you can't tell. That made it an inside joke between the girl and her father. If my daughter did that I would think it's hilarious, but I guess that's just me.

Trisha_aus 15

Doc hasn't seen Red Forman, moron is quite mild...there is the "dumbass"

DeVaughnS 5

I think doc is Eric Forman lol

77-Yep. Should've seen the 'ass-kisser' barbs coming. That's low, even for you. Y'know what? **** it. Anything I say this point won't even matter, but IT WAS A JOKE DAMMIT! I made a crack at him, agreed with him, and now suddenly I'm an ass-kissing fanboy? The **** is wrong with you? Look, I thought the penis-cake-disguised-as-a rocket was witty and funny. I also thought 'moron' was a little harsh. Is there something wrong with that? Or is it suddenly a rule that if you agree with an FML vet you're automatically kissing their ass? Because this is exactly what happens any time I defend Noor, Doc, Skoomaki, etc. It's ******* ridiculous. Looks like I'll have to go out of my way to disagree with them now.

IDK about this one, my dad often jokingly calls me a moron when I do something stupid but I know it is a joke. But on the other hand it can hurt a child's self esteem by calling him/her a moron. Though if anyone has ever watched Chris Titus you would understand when I say that every single child feeling good about them self isn't necessary to his/her existence, it is often someone telling them that they are a moron which drives them to make whoever said that choke on their words.

125 - the fact that you know the "FML vets" enough and follow them around agreeing with them shows how much of an ass kisser you are.... Noor repeatedly makes idiotic comments that have nothing to do with a FML so the fact that you "defend them" just proves it...

hatesfate: You're a ******* joke. Who said anything about following them around? Not me, you. If you think I'm following them around, it means you see me commenting under them (not all the time, sometimes) means you must follow them around aswell? To this, your defense will probably be: "I don't follow them around, I just happen to blah blah bullshit excuses blah." Which would then mean that you're just making empty accusations. This, combined with your obvious blind hatred for Noor, brings me to the conclusion that either: A. You're jealous of their popularity (which would be pathetic). B. You're a troll. C. You're just an idiot. D. All of the above. Now I don't give a **** if you're done with me, but I'm done with you. Piss off, troll.

ravenh1979 13

Uh yeah really, maybe because she made a cake in the the shape of a d for a 5 year old! Kids aren't stupid! I'm sure the parents of the other kids that went to that party wouldn't find it amusing either. Jus sayin

138 - so filled with hate... It's the Internet bro.... Lol

alphaskater09 9

15-Excuse me Mr.bastard may I have your autograph?

141-"So much hate...It's the internet bro... lol." Wait. This couldn't POSSIBLY be the same person that was calling me a kiss-ass and an idiot...could it? Hypocrite. Thanks for this comment. You just proved my point for me; that you're an idiot troll. Well I guess my work here is done. Peace.

unknown_user5566 26

For those of you hating on MITM for replying to and/or agreeing with DocBastard and other "popular" commenters, your logic is shit. You are all basically saying that by replying to and/or agreeing with one of the well-known commenters, that makes you a fanboy, kiss-ass, etc. Using that logic, no one should EVER have the audacity to agree with or have a conversation with Doc, Noor, Pedix, etc. Does no one else see how ridiculous that is?!

144 - I thought you were done? Your posts are too long... It's FML not an essay... Chill bro

Hatesfate just shut the **** up and leave MITM alone, he never did anything to you so just leave it alone

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree OP.....

dominic1221 6

Tell that to all the caring parents whose kids turned out to be thieves and murderers.

Hey buzz kill get the **** out of here.... Your always posting depressing as shit.

mollysticks 10

I love how the last sentence was worded.

At least she didn't frost it like a **** and balls...

You seriously call your child a moron? Way to go with your parenting skills dude that's positive re enforcement right there... Not

I don't know, the kid was being pretty moronic. Plus some parents call their kids much worse.

unknown_user5566 26

Just because some parents berate their children in worse ways, it doesn't make it okay to call her a moron. That's like saying: "Oh, your mom slapped you in the face? No biggie. Some parents beat the living shit out of their kids." As I mentioned in another comment, I have to listen to some of the parents of my students talk badly about their children on an almost daily basis, and it's sickening. That's your child- any self-respecting parent should know it's NOT okay to talk about them that way.

Good thing you're not homophobic. You know, with the cake and the blowing of the... Well, you know.