Sex, Weird and Intimacy: Today, I lost my virginity. He then told me, in tears, how bad... - FML

By Anonymous - 07/06/2015 04:21 - New Zealand - Tauranga

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. He then told me, in tears, how bad he felt about leaving his dog alone for the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 280

You deserved it 3 408

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Same thing different taste

Testing the waters

By Anonymousss95 - 10/12/2011 12:03 - Sweden

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. Afterwards, he told me that he was only doing this because he wanted to know if he still truly loves his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 710

You deserved it 13 393

By EliseV - 03/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Chino Hills

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 970

You deserved it 6 008

By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 974

You deserved it 3 073

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 19:34 - United States

Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 401

You deserved it 4 267

By Anonymous - 21/08/2014 21:24 - Portugal - Alg

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 807

You deserved it 6 736

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 013

You deserved it 4 134

First time?

By Anonymous - 29/11/2013 11:56 - United States - Westminster

Spicy

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 286

You deserved it 6 901

Nuts

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 20:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 874

You deserved it 6 151

By Anonymous - 15/02/2012 19:26 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 878

You deserved it 2 798

By newlywed - 27/02/2011 05:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, I married a wonderful man. Even though both of us were no longer virgins, we decided to wait until marriage to sleep together. He just told me I was the worst he's ever had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 050

You deserved it 13 457

Next

Top comments

Attacksloth 33

Monday 8 June 2015 0:11

Clearly the most important bitch in his life.

Rinat_fml 26

Monday 8 June 2015 0:10

How was the sex though?

Comments

ColonelCusswords 24

Monday 8 June 2015 0:18

Aint that cute? You got one of those sensitive guys

Cads1 24

Monday 8 June 2015 0:19

Try having sex at his house.

muarif 19

Monday 8 June 2015 0:19

He's got 99 problems and a bitch is one!

Juryduty 7

Thursday 11 June 2015 19:52

Yes, a bitch is his number 1

SadSouthernBell 18

Monday 8 June 2015 0:21

He could have lied about the reason he got upset. Was it his first time too? Most men are prideful creatures >_

ColonelCusswords 24

Monday 8 June 2015 0:25

He was overcome by emotions

Miss_Mandi 29

Monday 8 June 2015 0:26

This is exactly what I thought when I first read the FML. Entirely possible.

jimmer23 21

Monday 8 June 2015 0:22

Bitches be trippin. In this case, he's the bitch.

lovelockdown23 23

Monday 8 June 2015 0:35

Lol this makes you guys sound really old or really young and since you're losing your virginity I'm guessing kinda young. If you're not either well at least you know he's not ashamed to show how much he cares.

Miss_Whipped 43

Monday 8 June 2015 0:45

You seem a bit conflicted.

TH_Insomniak 15

Monday 8 June 2015 0:37

at least we know he'll be a good father?...

DaRito 25

Monday 8 June 2015 0:37

"Today, I lost my virginity. It was extremely awkward when I wasn't thinking and told her that I shouldn't have left my dog alone. FML"

vinnerator 7

Monday 8 June 2015 0:39

at least he has feelings

mistress_paz 30

Monday 8 June 2015 0:41

First time for sex is usually painful or awful in some way.

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The Top

Ahoy ship's boys and girls ! Today we're heading to France. Be ready to face rain, storm and beer because Lille is welcoming us, and believe me, it's not Los Angeles. Do you all have your raincoats? -Bonjour ! First of all, present yourself ma jol...

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 16

Today, I left something in my boss's office. The door was closed which usually means she isn't in there, so I asked her coworker/friend for the key. When I opened the door, she screamed at me to get out of there. Turns out, she has just stopped breastfeeding her son and was pumping her breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 434

You deserved it 21 179

The Top

Today, I'd had enough of the annoying bird constantly singing in the shrillest bird voice possible outside of my window, so I chased it around the yard, shooing it away, as my cat sat there and watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 746

You deserved it 1 818

Today, during my sister’s baby shower, my 3 year-old daughter choked on a piece of food. My sister got upset because this apparently attracted a lot of attention from the other guests, and called my daughter an “attention whore” for “choosing today of all days to make a damn scene.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 128

Today, I told my boyfriend I had an appointment for laser hair removal. He responded by making "pew pew" noises and pretending to shoot my underarms. He's 28. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 936

You deserved it 29 426

Today, for the third time in 3 months, my pregnant wife woke me up by slapping me because I cheated on her in her dreams. I would never cheat on my wife, and she blames it on "pregnancy brain." There's still 5 months to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 991

You deserved it 156

Today, while my mother was driving me to school, her coffee started to spill. So like a normal parent, she held it over my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 603

You deserved it 2 298

Today, my friend pointed out that I’ve developed crushes on my last two bosses. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that before then, I had a secret crush on a professor back in college, too. Yet, I wonder why I’m single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 288

You deserved it 570