Kids: Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke...

By Marjorie - 13/07/2012 17:08 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 233

You deserved it 3 444

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Same thing different taste

My little boy

By Anonymous - 16/04/2021 00:30

Today, my 12 year-old son came home with two broken arms after finding an awesome place to ride his bike. He found a sweet jump and his handlebars broke. He's currently in slings and waiting for an appointment with a surgeon, the breaks were so bad, the hospital couldn't reset them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 104

Thanks Steve-O

By Anonymous - 30/07/2014 08:21 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I spent six hours at the ER. Why? My husband dared our seventeen-year-old son to recreate a 'Jackass' trolley-hedge diving stunt at the local supermarket. What wasn't on my groceries list was a broken arm, fractured wrist, whiplash and cuts and bruises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 516

You deserved it 5 133

Sussy Baka

By boymom - 04/08/2021 15:59

Today, my son broke his arm roughhousing with his brother on a bunk bed. While at the ER, he thought it would be funny to tell a different story to each doctor and nurse, forcing me to speak over him. They found this behavior "suspicious" and reported us to child services. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 186

You deserved it 161

Happy Birthday

By Anonymous - 30/01/2013 22:50 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I spent most of my daughter's 8th birthday with her in the hospital while her broken arm was put in a cast. Apparently, my son had told her that some people gained the ability to fly on their 8th birthday before encouraging her to find out by jumping off the slippery slide. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 872

You deserved it 2 500

By derped-out sperm - 01/04/2014 21:41 - Ireland

Today, I had to rush my 14-year-old son to the hospital after he fell out of a tree while trying to take an obnoxious "extreme selfie". FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 098

You deserved it 5 941

By Anonymous - 09/04/2012 22:32 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, I had to pick my 22-year-old son up from the hospital, after he got blind drunk, got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and got the bright idea of staggering to the local ER to get it cut off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 617

You deserved it 3 008

By Anonymous - 06/02/2016 11:56 - United States - Newburyport

Today, after a snowstorm my son decided that boarding off the roof onto my truck would be fun. My truck now has a puncture wound. The same truck that drove him to the hospital for his puncture wound and broken arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 900

You deserved it 1 906

By Connor - 25/12/2010 18:33 - United States

Today, I spent the morning in the ER with a broken arm. My little brother was in such a rush to get his presents first, that he violently shoved me out of the way on the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 061

You deserved it 2 650

Fire hasard

By Anonymous - 26/12/2015 18:23 - United States - Ridge

Today, I had to take my son to the ER after he badly messed up trying to light his farts on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 637

You deserved it 3 068

By failureparent - 21/03/2011 01:25 - United States

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 841

You deserved it 54 609

Starcatch77 20

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:00

You know what they say...The apple doesn't fall far from the tree... ...Or the window.

yuggi1 11

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:02

It's cause those damn ice cream trucks are there one second and gone the next. Every millisecond counts.

Comments

kimg0885 23

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:24

I was thinking the same thing. Darn now I have the Klondike jingle stuck in my head.

flutter4 7

Saturday 14 July 2012 4:09

Thanks, now I do too :)

MrSassypants 33

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:25

He is probably literaly screaming because of ice cream now.

tylermt1999 17

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:20

Blue bunny is amazing

alexup24 13

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:37

It could cause you to end up in heaven...

Keiren 14

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:36

That is...Ouch. Poor kiddo. When my dad was a kid he jumped off the roof with a 'parachute'. It was a harder landing than he expected. -_-

purpledrizzle 5

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:37

Those ice cream trucks don't wait.

CeeCee_fml 16

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:42

Well, did he get the ice cream?

osm1989_fml 6

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:38

Did he at least get his ice cream?

rcgirl2 11

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:44

This sounds like the FML about how a mom tossed her son's Xbox controller out the second story window and he jumped out the window to go get it.

unknown_user5566 26

Saturday 14 July 2012 2:45

Damnit, you beat me to it. I got a bit too excited and posted without reading. Good job, sir.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Management Frustration Capitalism Am I overreacting? Relatable Coworkers Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I demanded to know why my boyfriend takes so long in public toilets. He admitted his ex was such a nasty ho, she would drag him into public toilets whenever she wanted dick in public. So now every time he goes in one, he gets a boner and has to "get rid of it" before he can come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 137

You deserved it 350

Today, as I exited McDonald's after a quick lunch, a man in a jogging outfit ran past, snatching my handbag right off my shoulder as he tore past. He must have been at least 50. I broke down utterly exhausted before I could chase him even a single block. I'm 24. FML

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You deserved it 39 590

The Top

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You deserved it 2 968

Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because she "wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 083

You deserved it 4 371

Today, I walked into the living room to find my boyfriend plucking his ball hairs with the same tweezers I use for my eyebrows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 698

You deserved it 897

Today, my teacher assigned us teams in a class debate. I landed on the team that had to argue the obviously wrong point of view. When I finished, my teacher told me and the entire class how much I disturbed her, and how I reminded her of Hitler and Napoleon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 663

You deserved it 2 572

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I agree, your life sucks 47 927

You deserved it 9 446

Today, I was given a lapdance by a pregnant stripper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 989

You deserved it 42 025