Intimacy: Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was...

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 14:06 - Canada

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 911

You deserved it 39 536

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Stacy's Mom

By Anonymous - 26/08/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. It turns out the one day, long before I met my girlfriend, I had a one-night stand with her mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 247

By talkssuck - 30/03/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, I was hooking up with my girlfriend when her dad knocked on the clear door that leads to the room. About 5 minutes later both of her parents came in to give us the "talk" which included the first time her parents did it. In detail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 474

You deserved it 18 537

Close-Knit Family

By Bleached_Eyes - 02/04/2018 00:00 - United States - Pikesville

Today, I finally met my girlfriend's family. When it was time for dinner, I was sent upstairs to get her brother. When I walked in, he was laid out on his bed getting a rimjob from his cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 635

You deserved it 668

Thousand-yard stare

By timiscuous - 20/04/2020 20:00 - New Zealand

Today, I met my girlfriend’s parents for the first time. Her dad killed and skinned a goat in front of me, while staring at me the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 816

You deserved it 282

Meet the parents

By aj513 - 29/11/2015 01:20 - United States - New Bedford

Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parents' bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 132

You deserved it 30 534

By Anonymous - 10/09/2011 06:35 - United States

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 364

You deserved it 275 729

By Anonymous - 01/03/2011 16:21 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 046

You deserved it 45 871

Living in a bad TV show

By Anonymous - 25/03/2023 14:00

Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. Turns out I had sex with her once about 3 months before I met my girlfriend, and had no idea who she was. She’s been “happily” married to my girlfriend's dad for 25 years. I have no idea what to say or do and it’s awkward, so my girlfriend is getting suspicious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 073

You deserved it 462

By KeptMyHandsUp - 17/08/2017 17:15 - United States

Today, I was meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time. She warned me they were a little weird. Right when we walked in the door, her parents were there to greet us...in the nude. Apparently this constitutes as a LITTLE weird. They both hugged me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 176

You deserved it 353

By Anonymous - 29/02/2012 10:07 - United States

Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 573

You deserved it 49 433

littlegolferboy 4

Thursday 1 October 2009 20:27

On their bed? Wow, at least they know you're classy...

kimcachu 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 20:51

you couldn't have sex with her in HER bed?

Comments

MadeOfAwesome 1

Thursday 1 October 2009 21:47

At least her parents know what your intentions are

fyldude69 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 21:47

did the parents join?

njfliiboy 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 21:54

if the parents find out expect to be a dead man

PoeSlayer 0

Friday 22 July 2011 18:50

they did find out...they walked in on it...hence the point of the fml...

gigie2_fml 11

Monday 31 October 2011 5:48

you mean a dead girl...

movies12 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 22:12

ON. HER. PARENTS. BED! That is soo ******* gross!! Her parents need to sleep there. Does ur girlfriend not have a bed?

Islandboi9 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 22:19

amazing.

hqwoody327 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 22:30

You should have asked the dad for a high five!

RFreedom 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 23:02

that sucks :S

JoeyImage 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 23:25

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

nishylishy 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 23:30

It was a WOMAN who submitted it :).

xillentz 0

Friday 2 October 2009 0:15

i also noticed that. "On 10/01/2009 at 10:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)" hmm. not bad.

doggie3 0

Friday 2 October 2009 0:19

Sorry to say dude, but YDI.

Gia0896 0

Friday 2 October 2009 0:27

sucks 4 you man. oh wait. YOUR A LADY??????!!

Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Relatable Mental health Work Awkward AITA Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Annoying Family Intimacy Sex Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist Health Cute Sleep Animals Dogs Shopping My ex Cats Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, my seventy-year-old male live-in landlord asked if I'd heard a low humming noise the last few nights, around midnight, as someone had mentioned it. I feigned ignorance, whilst silently lamenting the decline of my self-pleasure opportunities. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 456

You deserved it 283

Today, as a CNA, I had to go through the belongings of a patient. His phone rang and I answered - it was his boss. As I explained, he cut me off and said to "drop the act" and "he better be there now or he's fired". He was pronounced dead-on-arrival. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 674

You deserved it 197

The Top

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The officer was nice and let me off with just a warning. That is, until my dipshit brother yelled "Fucking pig!" out the window as the officer walked back to his car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 608

You deserved it 22 213

Today, as we were exchanging little affections in bed, my girlfriend suddenly burst into tears. I insisted on knowing why. She had just realized how much she missed her ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 726

You deserved it 428

Today, I ate something that didn’t agree with me. Now I’m in the bathroom and my butthole is dry heaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 740

You deserved it 122

Today, I was on a plane heading home from vacation with the family, when went to relieve my bladder and stepped on someone's shit. They seemingly decided the floor was a better then the toilet. I walked all the way back to my seat with shit on my sandal, my sister thought I'd shat myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 187

Today, after months of searching, I finally found a flat that is affordable and with amazing flatmates. The catch? I'm developing feelings for one of them. My heart sinks when they have a date over. I'm also in a relationship. The situation is eating me up inside. I hate that I'll have to go. Cupid, go f*ck yourself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 648

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 361

You deserved it 25 974