Miscellaneous: Today, I saw an attractive, thin woman eating a salad. Trying...

By Anonymous - 08/02/2011 18:32 - United States

Today, I saw an attractive, thin woman eating a salad. Trying to be smooth, I approached her and told her that she didn't need to eat so scarcely, because she was beautiful. She promptly gave me a dirty look and informed me that she was a vegetarian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 680

You deserved it 50 559

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Same thing different taste

Thanks Karen

By Anonymous - 26/08/2014 15:30 - United States - Gloucester

Today, I was taking a customer's order, when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 685

You deserved it 4 366

By Anonymous - 05/12/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too. I was eating a steak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 205

You deserved it 67 206

By Anonymous - 20/07/2009 00:22 - United States

Today, I went out to eat at a restaurant. When the waitress saw me, she continously told me how beautiful and kind I was. Flattered, I just said thank you. Five minutes later, one of the ugliest girls I've ever seen in my life walked in. The waitress told her the same exact things she told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 617

You deserved it 13 577

By Anonymous - 20/08/2014 22:14 - Sweden - ?kersberga

Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 955

You deserved it 8 252

That line is a cheesy cliché, so use it wisely

By Giden - 18/07/2022 14:00

Today, I was at a party and saw this girl who used to be overweight. She'd lost a significant amount of weight and looked so good, I went to chat her up. She immediately told me to get lost. According to her, if I "didn’t appreciate her at her worst, I don’t deserve her at her best." FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 2 812

By hadrienne's pall - 13/05/2016 19:25 - Canada - Markham

Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 977

You deserved it 4 283

By salad - 28/04/2014 15:38 - United States - North Charleston

Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 952

You deserved it 5 323

By tardspawn - 05/04/2015 15:38 - United Kingdom - Horsham

Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 599

You deserved it 4 010

By fuckedbyahipster - 15/06/2013 16:13 - Finland

Today, I was lectured by a self-professed vegan over my "barbaric" eating habits, in between her scarfing down a tuna fish sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 739

You deserved it 2 891

Smooth

By godzilllla - 08/08/2015 01:59 - United States - Bothell

Today, while at the local supermarket, I spotted an attractive woman packing food into a shelf. Trying to be flirty, I asked where I could find the cream cheese. Apparently, it was on the shelf right behind me. I heard her mutter "idiot" under her breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 380

You deserved it 11 817

DoubleEdgedBlade 4

Tuesday 8 February 2011 23:55

Now she's definitely not going to eat your meat!

IceyJustin 1

Tuesday 8 February 2011 23:53

Yeah real smooth.

Comments

Inspired22 11

Wednesday 9 February 2011 0:40

Yeah, I think it's a good rule of thumb to avoid talking about eating, weight, etc. when hitting on a girl.

holycraplions 4

Wednesday 9 February 2011 0:46

Worst. Line. Ever. Women only laugh with salad when they're ALONE.

RyNo24 4

Wednesday 9 February 2011 0:55

she deserves it for being a hippy vegetarian...

KeefB 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 5:15

'Hippy' as is 'hipster' or the old school hippies?

dudeitsdanny 9

Wednesday 9 February 2011 6:46

Or maybe she had big hips?

SweetnessMallory 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 1:04

I guess it wasnt your fault you were just trying to be nice. How were you supposed to know?

Zebidee 8

Wednesday 9 February 2011 1:04

Just because you can see her, doesn't mean you should hit on her. If I had a dollar for every time a girl was sitting, minding her own business, eating her lunch, but secretly thinking "I wish some socially awkward guy would come up and try a pick-up line on me", I'd have less money than KaySL's kissing booth.

Zebidee 8

Wednesday 9 February 2011 1:19

You're not using the term 'life energy' in its conventional sense, are you? No ****.

Zebidee 8

Wednesday 9 February 2011 1:22

Batter up, sunshine! No ****.

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 9 February 2011 4:10

*hits thumbs down on this whole ******* thread repeatedly* You sick *****.

KeefB 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 5:19

There is a ******* bottle in the pelvis.

millionaire93 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 1:16

well she didn't have to be a bitch about it ad make you feel like shit tho.

greenlantern27 6

Wednesday 9 February 2011 1:17

I would say that was still a nice compliment. The woman shouldn't have been that rude about it. She could have just laughed it off and said politely, "I'm actually a vegetarian, but thanks!".