Miscellaneous: Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

By Anonymous - 18/01/2014 06:29 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 096

You deserved it 10 268

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Same thing different taste

By catherineratley - 06/05/2012 04:09 - United States - Carmi

Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 435

You deserved it 2 982

Roadworthy

By MerryDeathmas - 18/07/2015 04:31 - Canada - Lloydminster

Today, after an argument with my girlfriend, I tried to be dramatic by slamming my car door shut as hard as I could. Something broke and now it won't open. Now I have to climb through the passenger's side just to drive my car to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 532

You deserved it 30 096

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 16:45 - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 002

You deserved it 32 366

By Ouch - 22/05/2009 15:16 - United States

Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 435

You deserved it 13 264

By Anonymous - 31/12/2015 21:26 - New Zealand

Today, I found out how it feels to have a car door slammed shut on my hand, breaking two of my fingers. Hint: it's fucking painful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 171

You deserved it 2 040

By MikeNick - 17/12/2011 07:59 - United States

Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 710

You deserved it 9 798

By seththing - 22/05/2016 03:49

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I had a spare key in my wallet, that I also left in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 111

You deserved it 3 178

By Anonymous - 29/11/2009 07:25 - Canada

Today, I locked my keys in the car while the car was running because I got out to get the parking ticket attached to my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 419

You deserved it 26 403

By Smile - 27/11/2008 04:21 - France

Today, after numerous attempts, my car door still wouldn't unlock. After going ballistic on the lock, the key broke off inside. I then realized it wasn't my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 473

You deserved it 31 424

I'm so tired

By slapstick1982 - 30/05/2024 03:00 - United States - Port Washington

Today, after double-checking to make sure the garage door was completely open, I backed my car into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 267

karlcolt45 19

Saturday 18 January 2014 17:00

that's like when dudes sit on their balls. there are no winnings...except for the inanimate objects I suppose

XCrazyMofo2010X 17

Saturday 18 January 2014 17:03

Are they that big?

Comments

froggyjade 16

Saturday 18 January 2014 21:29

I'm always knocking my boobs on things, but a car door? ouch!

dreishot 1

Saturday 18 January 2014 21:39

well at least now they "perky"..:-)

mosquito19 14

Saturday 18 January 2014 21:50

to keep it from happening again, you should've flip it over your shoulder.

invisibleFlower 10

Saturday 18 January 2014 21:55

How does that even happen

Jimmysmom 1

Saturday 18 January 2014 21:57

I shut my nipple in my laptop once. Some of the worst pain I have ever experienced.

MisUnFortunate 31

Saturday 18 January 2014 23:28

Pffff you copied that from an FML post XD

kjack49044 18

Saturday 18 January 2014 23:08

I can't help but wonder just how big your breasts are exactly.

ethan9100 7

Saturday 18 January 2014 23:19

how do you even do that

godfathermock 19

Saturday 18 January 2014 23:23

i can't even imagine how this could of happened. how big are they? what position were you in? what were you doing?

SarajanSiva 2

Saturday 18 January 2014 23:30

I never knew that was possible

stitesy29 18

Sunday 19 January 2014 0:29

How the ****?

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Today, a friend and I saw some deer outside my car. Since we were both leaving for college the next day we wanted to do something memorable so we decided to chase the deer. Turns out the deer wanted to chase us too. We ran for over five minutes screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 826

You deserved it 54 997

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I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 4 081

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 4 426

You deserved it 240

Today, we got my brother a pet hamster because he has trouble making friends. We thought a hamster would be a good way to teach him about caring for others. I walked into the room and the hamster was hanging from the ceiling. Turns out there's a reason my brother doesn't have friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 116

You deserved it 5 436

Today, I was having a beautiful lucid dream when a telemarketer called at 5AM, waking me up. I silenced my phone and went back to sleep, and was somehow able to resume my lucid dream. Then my phone vibrated me awake. It was the same telemarketer, this time calling at 7AM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 258

You deserved it 269

Today, I went out with two new friends. While we were talking, they said that their mother had called them to go home. Later on, I saw them in the main square, hanging out. I wasn't creepy or disrespectful, and I don't know why they did it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 127

Today, my kids' mother, who has been absent and living in a different state for over 12 years, sent a children services worker to my house with a long list of allegations, even though she's 25k behind in support, rather than try to build a normal relationship with her kids in any kind of healthy way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 125

You deserved it 73

Today, my girlfriend of three and half years broke up with me, just after I'd finished fixing up her house, which took me about three and a half years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 682

You deserved it 6 029

Same thing different taste

Roadworthy

I'm so tired

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