Intimacy: Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate... - FML

By Username - 23/11/2010 06:50

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 514

You deserved it 14 026

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Same thing different taste

By MulticoloredSlug - 13/10/2016 10:57 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 431

You deserved it 1 416

By Anonymous - 04/10/2009 21:40 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend's head was on my lap. I bent down to kiss him. My stomach rolls got there first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 695

You deserved it 48 847

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 960

You deserved it 14 588

By gettinghotinhere - 17/10/2014 18:29 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy

Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 825

You deserved it 6 873

Booming

By Anonymous - 26/04/2013 22:22 - United States - Arvada

Spicy

Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 932

You deserved it 10 193

By Anonymous - 07/11/2010 22:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 960

You deserved it 6 539

Romance ain't dead

By awkwardbf - 09/09/2009 01:26 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriend's lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said, "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 990

You deserved it 4 892

By alltern8ive - 09/11/2009 05:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt and stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 312

You deserved it 5 111

By Maria - 14/03/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - York

Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 663

You deserved it 403

Bad timing

By KrissyBearr - 31/12/2011 01:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 416

You deserved it 10 013

Next

Top comments

sarahjane86 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 12:04

romantic

theFMLiest1ofThe 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 17:21

#69 how dare you dishonor the FML gods that bestowed 69 upon you. furthermore, not all girls give good BJ's. It's a shame that you are too inexperienced to have had the pleasure of enjoying an amazing knob gobbling. you'll see the light some day. I'm also concerned that #70 seems to think you own a gay. I hope he's mistaken, but if the rumor is true, please let it back out into the wild. gays are not meant to be kept as pets.

Comments

gusgus36 5

Tuesday 23 November 2010 16:01

hah sorry OP. kinda sounds like my bf too... guys can be lame, what can I say...

HollywoodKaos 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 16:22

I wouldn't do it e would have to go first and also told him to stop thinking with his head.

Nadinek98 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 17:12

u should name it princess puddles

sabroso 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 17:25

that's all the passion you need

cherry72 13

Tuesday 23 November 2010 17:30

standard male response lmao. sorry ladies but u know 9 outta 10 guys woulda done the same thing. it's sad but true speaking from being a female. lol

madskillz242005 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 17:56

my type of dude lol... gettin head is his most passionate moment lol.

LouieLZ 5

Tuesday 23 November 2010 17:58

you asked for it.

xredxvirusx 3

Tuesday 23 November 2010 18:01

hahahahaaha!! that's awesome

GabiIsPrettyKewl 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 18:48

hahahaha the question is ... did u finish wat he started ???

xCaseyx 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 18:55

23, you're discusting. That's all.

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The Top

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 190

You deserved it 11 246

Today, after I've climbed some of the world's tallest mountains before I was 30, including Everest, now thanks to Covid, plus a genetic lung condition I inherited from my absentee bastard father, I have to stop for breath halfway up the stairs, and sex can make me so lightheaded I pass out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 802

You deserved it 354

The Top

Today, I figured I've been watching too many horror films, due to my parrot mimicking a women's blood-curdling screams that he heard in a movie. How do I know? He decided to reproduce the screams at 3 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 574

You deserved it 436

Today, I found my wife crying. She said she’d lost her diamond ring. I backtracked her activities and suggested where to look. She found it in the fridge. She now thinks I hid it there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 061

You deserved it 107

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because I gave him an STD I didn’t know I had. Before sleeping together, he asked me to get tested. Feeling lazy, I got some fake test results from Google Images. He called me a few weeks later, saying he has the clap. I told him he must've got it from someone else. He was a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 1 456

Today, I spotted a $100 bill on the ground. Being a little strapped for cash, I excitedly picked it up. I discovered it was one of those religious tract papers made to look like a folded bill, with a message scolding me for being greedy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 047

You deserved it 4 843

Today, I was talking to an ex who I still love. He told me how much he wanted to see me, how much he missed me, and we started talking about when we could spend the day at his house. I mentioned Saturday, and he said, "I can't, I have to take my fiancée to the doctor's to find out our baby's sex." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 182

You deserved it 8 030

Today, I had my back waxed to deal with the uncontrollable hair growth. Afterwards, I broke out in numerous pimples where the hair used to be. Basically, a lose-lose situation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 787

You deserved it 3 864