Intimacy: Today, I walked in the door and heard my husband calling me to...

By Lewis - 04/09/2010 11:02 - Australia

Today, I walked in the door and heard my husband calling me to the bedroom. I got a little excited, took my clothes off, and walked into the bedroom. I forgot our mortgagor was inspecting our house today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 255

You deserved it 34 493

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/11/2010 01:39 - United States

Today, I came home to my family remodeling our (extremely) out of date bathroom. I was SUPER excited to help them get it done. I walked down the hallway and opened my bedroom door to find a huge, gaping hole in my wall and my room covered in dust. I had to sweep every surface in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 360

You deserved it 3 265

Classic Dave

By Sarahir - 29/04/2020 05:00

Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 196

You deserved it 406

By nudesurprise - 16/04/2009 14:49 - United States

Today, I was at my new apartment. My fiancé was coming home so I filled the apartment with candles and put on some sexy music. When he came up to my door, I answered the door, naked. What I didn't know was that he was bringing his dad to see the new apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 926

You deserved it 35 109

By Mrs. Ned - 09/09/2015 02:00 - United States - Incline Village

Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him he immediately went soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 936

You deserved it 3 094

Buzzing the tower

By Princess ? - 12/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 164

You deserved it 283

My little buddy

By Anonymous - 18/08/2009 05:37 - United States

Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 114

You deserved it 6 511

By nnnaaazzz - 24/10/2009 12:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to pay a suprise visit to my boyfriend's house. I let myself in, walked up to his bedroom and found him dancing around. In the dress I had left the other weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 353

You deserved it 6 228

By Hunterxx - 07/08/2010 05:21 - United States

Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 758

You deserved it 7 235

By Ropebunnbon - 15/08/2018 13:00

Today, after leaving for the city inspector to make sure everything was up to code, my husband and I remembered that we'd forgotten to take down the rope bondage setup and equipment in the closet. We came home to paperwork on the kitchen counter and the closet door open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 596

You deserved it 1 307

Assumptions

By Anonymous - 22/06/2023 15:00

Today, I left my husband in charge of the house for a day. When I returned, I saw him gaming through the window, so I stormed in and yelled at him. Then, my eyes adjusted, and I saw the neatly folded laundry, clean kitchen, vacuumed rugs, and my son, who was asleep until I woke him. Whoops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 2 660

aairborne52 0

Saturday 4 September 2010 19:48

can you say awkward?

ryankon518 3

Saturday 4 September 2010 20:02

dress to impress, well in this case undress

Comments

jdfml90 0

Saturday 4 September 2010 23:29

Brilliant. Made the mortagers day too!

sourgirl101 28

Saturday 4 September 2010 23:39

So what's the price of the market after that peep show? "She's a brick...house!"

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Saturday 4 September 2010 23:57

Clever ;)

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Sunday 5 September 2010 0:01

Hm, how long have you been married? Wives can usually tell their husbands' sexy-time tone of voice from their impress-a-stranger tone.

lovesteph3523 0

Sunday 5 September 2010 1:11

ohh..thats true.

KylAisAmazingG 0

Sunday 5 September 2010 1:16

was there not an unusual car parked outside your house?

hayd83 0

Sunday 5 September 2010 1:58

one in each hole lol

angrynegro7 16

Sunday 5 September 2010 2:00

I've seen pornos that start out just like that OP! Just run with it and see where it takes you! ;)

CaliGali 9

Sunday 5 September 2010 2:44

YDI for having a dirty mind instead of being responsible and remembering the mortgagor appointment lol hahaha use your dirty mind late at night OP!

UndiscoveredChao 0

Sunday 5 September 2010 4:49

I'd like to say this is bs...burning case I am wrong.. WTF HOW THE F DID U FORGET SOMETHING LIKE THAT??? "sorry Hun I forgot a stranger would be in our house today even tho there is a strange car outside and everything" NO!!!!

frootietootie 0

Sunday 5 September 2010 5:26

OP ur stupid YDI for assuming he even wanted to have sex with an idiot like u. man peeps like u make me mad.

boopityboppity 11

Sunday 5 September 2010 7:31

You know what makes me mad? When a supercilious ignoramus attempts to insult the intelligence of someone. However, when I look a second time, I laugh, because you tried to insult another's intellect, but you misspelled "probably," "totally," "you," and "people." Hypocrites should be subjected to "the Pain" from the Princess Bride.