Intimacy: Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha"...

By sluttydancer - 10/06/2009 13:51 - United States

Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha" stuck in my head all day so I decided to let it out by doing a slutty dance, including spinning around the support pole in the kitchen. I heard a noise outside and saw my friend's dad had been cleaning the windows. With a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 256

You deserved it 61 931

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 04/05/2011 10:01 - Australia

Today, as I was walking back inside I noticed my mop leaning on the wall next to my door. I picked it up and started slow dancing with it, imagining it was the girl I'm in love with. I didn't notice my neighbours bunched up at their window laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 469

You deserved it 33 985

By youjustsuck - 25/07/2011 18:07 - United States

Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 262

You deserved it 12 784

By danam - 05/07/2011 02:38 - Canada

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 224

You deserved it 4 323

By secret dancer - 16/08/2011 16:55 - Sweden

Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 457

You deserved it 11 365

By kiwichick4life - 30/07/2013 16:42 - United States - Pickerington

Today, I was pretending to be a ballerina. I was dancing around my room, making a complete dick of myself. I eventually caught sight of a pair of guys grinning and filming me with their cellphones through my window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 644

You deserved it 14 174

By Danny - 28/05/2012 18:02 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 286

You deserved it 5 773

By DusterOverBits - 23/09/2009 09:35 - United Kingdom

Today, I was home alone, and decided to do some naked cleaning just because I could. After half an hour of liberating nakie-dusting, I turn around to see my boyfriend and his best friend gaping at me open mouthed. His older brother however gave a creepy smile and the thumbs up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 382

You deserved it 44 839

By crazygirl10 - 28/05/2010 20:37 - United States

Today, both my parents were at work so I was home alone. My boyfriend had wanted to surprise me and take me out to lunch. He found me dancing on my kitchen table singing "Like a Virgin" at the top of my lungs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 536

You deserved it 33 124

By best_friend - 25/07/2011 06:43 - United States

Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 562

You deserved it 9 971

By SCREWED - 15/07/2011 06:25 - United States

Today, I came home to my mom dancing the hustle naked. With a group of 4 friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 874

You deserved it 3 900

dmmd8686 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:57

Should have gone up to him and said "that'll cost you 20 for the show"

regalarius 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:54

Man, if I had a dollar for every minute I've been glad no one was watching me, I'd be a rich man. FYL. Also: in before "do him"

Comments

phil974y 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 2:34

Ha ha thats hot!!

pikL3bOi 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 2:50

At least ur hot:) b more careful next time

henri_fml 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 3:15

you didn't notice him cleaning the window, but you noticed the boner? something fishy going on here.

CourtneyDanielle_fml 9

Thursday 11 June 2009 3:26

...Awkward!

suppman 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 3:29

now that's stuck in my head. lol. but that sucks.

awdorable 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 3:31

LMAO, he's a pedo Depends on how old HE is, and how old YOU are!! W.e, FYL, hun. And didja flip the guy off?? That would've been gold. Lol

gelatinskeleton 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 3:31

You deserve it, not only for simply being a ****, but also for reacting the way you did. Don't act like you're so disturbed that your friend's dad got an erection; that is why people do slutty dances in the first place - to impress members of the opposite (or same) sex. If you don't want to see an old-man-boner, you should contain your "sluttiness" until you are in the comforts of your own home. Or the local brothel, whichever.

fosizzlemynizzlE 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 3:32

lol, she's saying that its F her life cause its awkward because she didn't know he was there. nobody has any doubt as to why the guy has a boner.

mattmag 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 3:57

#15 explained it rather well. If he had a boner, just take it as an involuntary compliment and a reminder that you are attractive. If he was jacking off, then you have every right to be creeped out.