Intimacy: Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha"...

By sluttydancer - 10/06/2009 13:51 - United States

Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha" stuck in my head all day so I decided to let it out by doing a slutty dance, including spinning around the support pole in the kitchen. I heard a noise outside and saw my friend's dad had been cleaning the windows. With a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 256

You deserved it 61 931

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 04/05/2011 10:01 - Australia

Today, as I was walking back inside I noticed my mop leaning on the wall next to my door. I picked it up and started slow dancing with it, imagining it was the girl I'm in love with. I didn't notice my neighbours bunched up at their window laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 469

You deserved it 33 985

By youjustsuck - 25/07/2011 18:07 - United States

Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 262

You deserved it 12 784

By danam - 05/07/2011 02:38 - Canada

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 224

You deserved it 4 323

By secret dancer - 16/08/2011 16:55 - Sweden

Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 457

You deserved it 11 365

By kiwichick4life - 30/07/2013 16:42 - United States - Pickerington

Today, I was pretending to be a ballerina. I was dancing around my room, making a complete dick of myself. I eventually caught sight of a pair of guys grinning and filming me with their cellphones through my window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 644

You deserved it 14 174

By Danny - 28/05/2012 18:02 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 286

You deserved it 5 773

By DusterOverBits - 23/09/2009 09:35 - United Kingdom

Today, I was home alone, and decided to do some naked cleaning just because I could. After half an hour of liberating nakie-dusting, I turn around to see my boyfriend and his best friend gaping at me open mouthed. His older brother however gave a creepy smile and the thumbs up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 382

You deserved it 44 839

By crazygirl10 - 28/05/2010 20:37 - United States

Today, both my parents were at work so I was home alone. My boyfriend had wanted to surprise me and take me out to lunch. He found me dancing on my kitchen table singing "Like a Virgin" at the top of my lungs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 536

You deserved it 33 124

By best_friend - 25/07/2011 06:43 - United States

Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 563

You deserved it 9 971

By SCREWED - 15/07/2011 06:25 - United States

Today, I came home to my mom dancing the hustle naked. With a group of 4 friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 874

You deserved it 3 900

dmmd8686 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:57

Should have gone up to him and said "that'll cost you 20 for the show"

regalarius 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:54

Man, if I had a dollar for every minute I've been glad no one was watching me, I'd be a rich man. FYL. Also: in before "do him"

Comments

ranbeer 0

Friday 12 June 2009 4:42

do you blame the guy

tomberryboy 0

Friday 12 June 2009 7:18

Wut the **** is wrong wit u,being a **** won't help,and ur friends dad and u r gay,u both need to seek help

sh00t2thrill 0

Friday 12 June 2009 20:20

Porno plot?

midwintermist 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 5:02

@ #149 Lol.

RazorbladeSmiles 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 6:47

This was probably posted as an ad to heighten a career in "exotic dance".

yurigagarin 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 11:28

Is your friend's dad hot? Just kidding. Serves you right for being slutty.

shumm 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 19:52

hahaha, yeah, sometimes you just have to dance it out. it was just at the wrong time and at the wrong place

caca12_fml 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:25

ithnk dats wat u get 4bein a dumbass skut! if u dnt noe wat skut means jus ask ur mutha cuz it seems lyk dats wat she tought u 2b =>

I_ate_pikachu 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 2:01

Look what today's pop music is turning girls into now. *shakes head* xDDD

DoctorManhattan 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 3:55

Why wouldn't he use a sponge or a squeegee or something instead?

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Same thing different taste

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