Intimacy: Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha"...

By sluttydancer - 10/06/2009 13:51 - United States

Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha" stuck in my head all day so I decided to let it out by doing a slutty dance, including spinning around the support pole in the kitchen. I heard a noise outside and saw my friend's dad had been cleaning the windows. With a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 257

You deserved it 61 937

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 04/05/2011 10:01 - Australia

Today, as I was walking back inside I noticed my mop leaning on the wall next to my door. I picked it up and started slow dancing with it, imagining it was the girl I'm in love with. I didn't notice my neighbours bunched up at their window laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 472

You deserved it 33 992

By youjustsuck - 25/07/2011 18:07 - United States

Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 264

You deserved it 12 787

By danam - 05/07/2011 02:38 - Canada

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 232

You deserved it 4 327

By secret dancer - 16/08/2011 16:55 - Sweden

Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 458

You deserved it 11 371

By kiwichick4life - 30/07/2013 16:42 - United States - Pickerington

Today, I was pretending to be a ballerina. I was dancing around my room, making a complete dick of myself. I eventually caught sight of a pair of guys grinning and filming me with their cellphones through my window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 648

You deserved it 14 174

By Danny - 28/05/2012 18:02 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 296

You deserved it 5 777

By DusterOverBits - 23/09/2009 09:35 - United Kingdom

Today, I was home alone, and decided to do some naked cleaning just because I could. After half an hour of liberating nakie-dusting, I turn around to see my boyfriend and his best friend gaping at me open mouthed. His older brother however gave a creepy smile and the thumbs up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 388

You deserved it 44 854

By crazygirl10 - 28/05/2010 20:37 - United States

Today, both my parents were at work so I was home alone. My boyfriend had wanted to surprise me and take me out to lunch. He found me dancing on my kitchen table singing "Like a Virgin" at the top of my lungs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 537

You deserved it 33 127

By best_friend - 25/07/2011 06:43 - United States

Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 575

You deserved it 9 974

By SCREWED - 15/07/2011 06:25 - United States

Today, I came home to my mom dancing the hustle naked. With a group of 4 friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 881

You deserved it 3 903

dmmd8686 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:57

Should have gone up to him and said "that'll cost you 20 for the show"

regalarius 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:54

Man, if I had a dollar for every minute I've been glad no one was watching me, I'd be a rich man. FYL. Also: in before "do him"

Comments

jannas 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 9:38

sexay! HAHAHAHAHHA!

rustyrox 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 11:41

American Beauty... The sequal. Starring [insert your name here]

rustyrox 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 11:45

jnic- I concur

xxdani 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 12:53

I don't think you deserved this, I mean you probably should've closed the curtains or something, but no matter how stupid everybody dances by themselves sometimes, she wasn't doing it for anyone to see and in this situation I would be a little creeped out if I was her and my friend's dad got a boner, even though I don't blame the dad for getting one since he can't exactly help it.

El_Oh_El 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 15:52

I'll go with FYL. Even though your action invites such a reaction, but having your friend's dad observe you from afar and get horny from looking at you? That's just plain creepy.

GreenGiant_fml 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 17:22

Question 1: How old are you? Question 2: How soon is he going to jail for being a pervert? That's disgusting. But kinda funny.

izzyyy 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 18:09

The only bad thing about that is now the OP might find it a little awkward to be around him, but ONLY if he saw that she saw him with a boner. Besides that, psh I'd act like I didn't see anything. And I could understand why she was dancing, I've done that in a friends house before.