Work: Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers...

By ABBenzin - 01/02/2012 16:11 - United States

Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 439

You deserved it 3 783

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Same thing different taste

By Matthew - 27/11/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what happens when I lose my key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 888

You deserved it 4 582

By MadameM - 26/02/2009 08:17 - United States

Today, I accidentally locked my car and house keys along with my phone in my car. Then I had to break into my own house looking for the spare. Someone called the police and I had to explain that I lived there. I forgot to grab the spare when I went to talk to the police officers I locked the door behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 140

You deserved it 9 763

Long walk home

By zoe - 15/07/2022 22:00

Today, I got locked out of a building that I work in (I work night shifts). I locked my phone, wallet, and car keys in the building. I had no way of contacting my boss or getting a ride. I had to walk home at night, almost got hit by a car full of dudes yelling slurs, and had a woman scream at me from the passenger seat of a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 216

By FailAtLife - 22/02/2009 04:22 - United States

Today, I had a job interview at a restauraunt opening up. One manager hypothetically asked me why I should be hired. I said I was more efficient than most. I left to find I'd locked my keys in the car. It took all the managers to help me get my keys out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 190

You deserved it 33 748

By MattVh - 12/01/2010 17:23 - Belgium

Today, someone had put a lock on my bike. While I was trying to saw it off, the police drove by. I was arrested for trying to steal a bike and released four hours later when they figured out that it was actually my bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 938

You deserved it 2 462

Let em in

By Anonymous - 29/07/2022 10:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, my neighbour called to say a crazy drunk man was breaking into my house. Thankfully, the police were already there, questioning me about “attempted unlawful entry” into my own house. My keys had been taken from a friend so I wouldn’t drive. It's 1°C and I still haven’t gotten inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 231

Confess!

By hitandrun - 10/08/2009 18:28 - United States

Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 224

You deserved it 76 106

By Jason - 12/08/2010 20:33 - United States

Today, I spent forty minutes trying to break into my own house after being locked out. After finally getting in through a small unlocked window, I discovered my keys in my pants pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 733

You deserved it 44 400

Thanks for your help

By forgotten - 28/02/2013 00:42 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I saw my car being broken into on the street below my apartment. Too scared to stop them myself, I called the police. Before I could even tell them what was going on, they put me on hold. It was a good 5 minutes before I realized they'd hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 210

You deserved it 3 987

Bad day

By Anonymous - 12/11/2010 05:37 - United States

Today, I accidentally set off an alarm at the school I work for. No one was there, I didn't have the code or password the company needed, my boss wouldn't answer his phone, 3 policemen interrogated me and asked for ID but realized I left home without my wallet. There was nothing I could do. I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 200

You deserved it 5 814

MubeenMV3 5

Wednesday 1 February 2012 18:48

Ohh sht, the first sentence of this FML is so misleading lmao

babybebop2 4

Wednesday 1 February 2012 18:48

Ha I started reading like "you deserved it" then Im like oh no that sucks

Comments

perdix 29

Wednesday 1 February 2012 18:58

That locksmith act sure is a good cover for your life of crime.

WCARlover 34

Wednesday 1 February 2012 18:58

Hey at least they're doing their job

Takuya272727 16

Wednesday 1 February 2012 20:28

Three though? I think they're a little eager... But then again, things can get out of hand...

disney_blonde 16

Wednesday 1 February 2012 18:58

Why weren't the homeowners with you?

THE_A_TEEN 27

Wednesday 1 February 2012 19:02

You are a very sick, twisted, horrible individual. Here's my number (passes card). Call he for an appoinment for a lobotomy. :D

flockz 19

Wednesday 1 February 2012 19:03

i think my potato gun would come in handy for this situation.

jerseyboy732 16

Wednesday 1 February 2012 21:11

my donut gun would have worked better

DrMime 10

Wednesday 1 February 2012 19:03

Ah the old locksmith excuse! I tried that when I got busted for running a speakeasy, didn't really work, or make sense...

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Wednesday 1 February 2012 19:04

Ooooo I'm glad you cleared that up or I would have pressed YDI for breaking into someone's house. lol But yes, where in the world were the owners? They probably ran off when they saw the cops show up. :D

Qluz 3

Wednesday 1 February 2012 19:08

They're on to you Mr. Locksmith! Courir courir!

THE_A_TEEN 27

Wednesday 1 February 2012 19:09

Apperantly the cops thought you wee a key suspect in a string of burglaries that happen during this past month. I hope that this has unlocked a door in your brain that tells you that you have to,be more cautious with your apperance. The tumblers have moved for you, my friend. Lock that dispair away. Be happy you weren't wrongfully locked away by the cops or thrown away the key. Have a nice life.