Intimacy: Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty...

By Anonymous - 20/06/2009 11:13 - Switzerland

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 302

Cyber Monday: Clicks and Quiproquos
When technology meets shopping, expect stories as surprising as an unexpected click! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

area51avenger 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 20:04

I'm trying to imagine the position you must have been in to make smacking her butt and your balls both possible options

teehee520 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 20:05

Nice hand / ball coordination.

Comments

maupa 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:01

still, OP should get some aimbot, or something ;)

weightloss 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:04

how is this even possible hahahha?

Sum_it 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:10

if you have such bad aim, how did u make it in her v. lol

TheSuitGuy 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:15

Now you know why some women really, really hate being smacked on the ass during sex.

on_a_boat 0

Sunday 21 June 2009 5:26

LOL that's not why.

jewelzgalore 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:21

You writhing in pain and screaming like a 5-year-old must have amped up the sexiness level 100%. Good job.

whoahanna 0

Sunday 21 June 2009 0:04

Hahahahahahhahahhahahah brilliant.

mbravens 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:21

your a ******* idiot.

abcdefghiloveyou 0

Sunday 21 June 2009 0:47

It's "you're", idiot.

goldberg2046 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:24

hahaha you dick!

ziqi92 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:39

b4 i completely lose myself in ROFL, can i ask HOW?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

NikiiSlikii 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:45

Um... Wooow..... Better luck next time, Artard.

seb12992 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 22:50

Awesome FML.

Keywords

Gross Miscellaneous Insects Cute Neighbours Kids Proposal Awkward Love Delivery Health Amazon Relatable Hair Scary Allergies Dogs Animals Babysitter Skincare Emergency Doctor Hospital Vacation Engagement ring AITA Social Media Facebook Money Scams

The Top

Today, I found out I have syphilis. I only slept with one person in my entire life, my boyfriend of 2 years. When I told him about it, he burst into tears and said, "It was one time at a company party" and "Maybe if you put some Vagisil or something, it will go away." Seriously? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 000

You deserved it 157

Today, I was walking down the street when I passed a construction site. All of the workers started making a fuss and whistling, etc. Naturally, I got very flustered. I stood still for a second and faced them. One yelled for me to move because I was in the way of a girl at a stop light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 007

You deserved it 14 245

The Top

Today, my mother called me at work, freaking out about my dog, so I panicked. What was wrong? He had a hard-on and she'd never seen that happen before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 782

You deserved it 300

Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 119

You deserved it 3 813

Today, while I was shopping, I saw my old friend from high school. After a bit of talking, I ended up giving her my phone number. I wrote it on an old receipt. Little did I remember, the receipt was from when I bought lube and condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 763

You deserved it 39 714

Today, my man comes from a rich family but he doesn’t get along with them too well, and considers himself “blue collar by choice”. Apparently this entails forgetting basic human dress code, like it being a bad idea to wear a black shirt, unbuttoned, untucked, and with cargo pants for his new high-level office job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 652

You deserved it 210

Today, I spent most of my daughter's 8th birthday with her in the hospital while her broken arm was put in a cast. Apparently, my son had told her that some people gained the ability to fly on their 8th birthday before encouraging her to find out by jumping off the slippery slide. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 869

You deserved it 2 500

Today, while working the dinner rush at my job, every single computer, credit card machine, and printer froze for an hour and a half. The reason behind this issue was a large wire ripped from the mainframe, the same wire I tripped over 20 seconds before while my boss watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 604

You deserved it 9 942