Intimacy: Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how...

By fml - 12/08/2011 06:14 - Canada

Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how much I loved him. His answer? "Less lovin' more humpin'." This happens every single time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 854

You deserved it 30 571

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Same thing different taste

Humping

By needanotherbed - 28/05/2014 14:21 - United Kingdom - Ipswich

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 413

You deserved it 6 196

By dummy - 17/02/2012 00:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 731

You deserved it 5 665

Exercise One

By blah - 02/06/2020 23:00

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he started humping my leg and said, "I'm gonna hump the fatness out of you and make you beautiful." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 310

You deserved it 435

Not helping

By Anonymous - 19/06/2022 06:00 - Spain

Today, i told my boyfriend that I wasn't feeling emotionally well, and wanted cuddles. He proceeded to hump my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 915

You deserved it 1 302

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 959

You deserved it 14 587

A little higher, dude

By Anonymous - 04/04/2022 14:00

Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 522

By jonnah - 05/03/2010 13:06 - Canada

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. His response? "Is that why you have been so clingy and annoying lately?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 682

You deserved it 5 293

By Anonymous - 19/06/2014 14:33 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 674

You deserved it 8 434

By Anonymous - 01/04/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 731

You deserved it 36 357

By yoked - 18/12/2009 03:48 - United States

Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still loved me. Her reply "Sometimes". This I know is true because she instantly rolled over and farted on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 192

You deserved it 4 640

silly_kitten 9

Friday 12 August 2011 16:14

That's when you say "Less humpin' more dumpin'."

zebraface 15

Friday 12 August 2011 16:08

Ditch his ass

Comments

tecktonik123 0

Friday 12 August 2011 23:21

don't be so mad at least you can get it in? am i right? xD some girls can't even get it in so don't think so negative about it. maybe less talking and spice things up?(:

OsirisFaction_fml 5

Friday 12 August 2011 23:27

Maybe you should take the hint that he just wants sex.

tj4234 35

Friday 12 August 2011 23:36

he's probably joking tbh...

AnneFTW 17

Saturday 13 August 2011 0:44

This happens every time and you're still with him? He obviously doesn't care about you, dump him.

sweetheartxoxo88 7

Saturday 13 August 2011 1:01

And you're still with him because...?

screamo_neve 12

Saturday 13 August 2011 2:36

Time for you to get a new guy. If all he wants is sex than YDI for staying with him.

Talyn_Rahl 4

Saturday 13 August 2011 3:04

dump him, dump him NOW. jesus, I don't get girls that go out with total tools and then expect our sympathy when they act like the douchebags they are, want to buy stronger option than You deserve it.

nicko_oz 4

Saturday 13 August 2011 5:55

who says he is a douche bag. Who says that they have been intimate only for a few months and that her saying that is way too early. He is probably freaking out at the fact that she said it even. Everyone always goes boo hoo he doesn't say he loves me. Maybe he is a smart guy and doesn't want to say it until he means it. To many people throw words around like boyfriend after only being together a day and i love you after only being together a week to assume there should actually be a connection more than physical at all points is stupid.

Nuahavizu 17

Sunday 14 August 2011 21:16

well, if he is smart... and waiting to say it till he means it, he should reply in a 'non douchebaggy' way. the bottom line is, he is being a dick. which, coincidentally, is exactly why she is attracted to him. if he wasnt an ass, she wouldnt be with him.