Intimacy: Today, I was on top of my boyfriend having sex and I was looking... - FML

By BerryRockstar - 21/04/2009 17:37 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was on top of my boyfriend having sex and I was looking away doing my thing. When I looked back, my boyfriend had headphones on and was playing air drums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 778

You deserved it 17 814

BerryRockstar tells us more.

BerryRockstar 9

Thursday 23 April 2009 13:25

AAAHH I can't believe I posted this on here and now i have to EXPLAIN myself to you people. Well there's the thing. 1) This was totally not a "Today" but a totally "Last November" 2) He was wearing headphones when we got into it, so why should i help him any 3) This was the FIRST time we'd done it, so HE was the bad lay 4) We're not dating anymore (I broke up with him) 5) FML anyway for wasting so much time with him I know i cheated on the "today" thing, but who hasn't. It just says that they all relatively START with "today" and END with FML. I hope this answers a couple of questions.

Black Friday: Sales and crazy situations
Shopping stories where discounts aren't the only surprises! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

JVonDahl 9

Wednesday 22 April 2009 2:06

Well, you weren't looking at him & paying attention to him, so why should he?

casey6492 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 2:03

haha, oh well. what song?

Comments

Majormaxo 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 1:57

At least he was enjoying himself... Can blaim him for wanting to achieve euphoria, though he probably shouldve payed attention to you more...

MaverickC12 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 2:59

Oh, come on. Maybe he could've warned you but still not a deal. Sex is always alot better when listening to music. As long as he's doing a good job at the time too. Guys like to combine their fun. EXAMPLE: I have played super mario brothers AND pacman during sex. yeah, get that accomplishment in your life. You shoulda told him to give you one of the ear phones

TryToBeKind 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 3:22

That's really crappy of him - if you're bad in bed, then he shouldn't be having sex with your or at least he should be asking for what he likes or giving you tips. Ew. I hope you dump him, you deserve better.

sillyblondeXD 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 3:54

LOL #87 XD

Amystika 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 5:21

your boyfriend is ******* epic. xDDDDD this is hilarious. dunno what I'd do if that happened to me though o.o

rednova 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 5:47

learn how to have sex then

itsMATyo 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 6:51

#18 FTW. xD

leilaniii 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 7:12

i think thats hilarious. :)

Delmar_fml 2

Thursday 23 April 2009 8:02

I'd hate to see what he does when you're going down on him...

jon_cohen 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 8:44

that is something i would do

13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22

Keywords

Weird Underwear Clothes Miscellaneous Halloween Dogs Animals Cute Fire Awkward First Dates Smells Love Work Scary Phobias Kids Embarrassing Shopping Mental health Therapy Health Friends Am I overreacting? AITA Birthday Poopoo peepee Thief Customers TV shows

The Top

Today, I was operating on a young girl, when she began to awaken during the surgery. We quickly put her back under, of course, but now I'm terrified that she'll remember my profuse cursing and get me in the shit with my curmudgeonly killjoy of a boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 987

You deserved it 11 435

Today, I followed my daughter and found out she wasn’t with friends, she was on a date. I confronted her about the lie, but she takes after her mother, a lawyer, and steamrollered over me about invading her privacy, so even though she lied, she somehow has the moral high ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 2 695

The Top

Today, my psychiatrist prescribed Xanax. I thought that was a little extreme and that my anxiety wasn't bad enough for that. Within the next hour, I had 2 panic attacks. I guess I'm worse off than I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 854

You deserved it 130

Today, as usual, my parents hate to see me relax. Every time I'm not working, doing a sport, or doing chores, I must be working on some form of education to keep them at bay. Today, I had the day off and caught up on schoolwork. My parents woke me up at 6 AM by running the vacuum outside my door. "Go mow the lawn, you slob." FML

I agree, your life sucks 554

You deserved it 59

Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 327

You deserved it 4 961

Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 312

You deserved it 32 629

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to break up with him since he's always busy, and I haven't seen or spoke to him in almost 2 months. I arrived to find out from his landlord that he'd moved out 3 weeks ago, leaving a note saying that we were over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 303

You deserved it 8 420

Today, I was at the mall with my friends, when a creepy man sat at the table next to us, and started rubbing his crotch, his gaze never leaving my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 954

You deserved it 4 208