Health: Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors...

By muffintop - 11/07/2011 02:34 - Canada

Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 183

You deserved it 13 573

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/07/2010 06:16 - United States

Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 661

You deserved it 47 210

By thebickster - 06/03/2009 17:58 - United States

Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 572

You deserved it 49 768

By sufia - 29/09/2016 11:14 - Pakistan

Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 349

You deserved it 1 170

By GothicbunnyxC - 28/01/2012 23:31 - Canada

Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 663

You deserved it 35 457

TSA

By androgynous - 30/03/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 563

You deserved it 4 755

By kclopez - 19/08/2017 23:15

Today, while going through customs at the airport, my bag was selected for screening. It was nearly overflowing because it was so full, so before the TSA agent searched it, I said, "Watch out - it's going to explode when you open it". Wrong choice of words. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 366

You deserved it 4 827

By search_me - 16/07/2009 23:39 - United States

Today, while going through airport security the lady asked why I folded everything so small. I said that I was going away for a month and needed to fit a lot of stuff in only one bag. She smiled, nodded and then dumped my luggage to search for "drugs and other illegal teen things." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 975

You deserved it 3 322

By jennyygrace - 11/07/2009 00:16 - United States

Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 610

You deserved it 41 649

By roo - 27/01/2011 16:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting a flight home. I'd worn a belt because my skirt was too big. When I walked through security, they asked me to remove my belt. My skirt fell down in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 935

You deserved it 13 424

Smugglers unite

By atang - 09/04/2009 09:16 - United States

Today, I was leaving a clothing store when the security guard stopped me and demanded that I surrender the clothing I was "trying to steal" by hiding it under my shirt. It turns out, he was just looking at my pot belly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 938

You deserved it 11 455

spazmattic 0

Monday 11 July 2011 9:06

Do the truffle shuffle?

Jacobt24 19

Monday 11 July 2011 9:09

at least OP isn't like some people and tuck their rolls into their pants with a huge bulge in the crotch area

Comments

CommonSenseKarma 17

Monday 11 July 2011 9:59

Okay, here, I'll show you: "Hey, mind the fat rolls, I'm overweight, embarrassed, and I'd rather do shit about it and post it on FML." There. Happy? Problem solved?

k8izgr8_fml 0

Monday 11 July 2011 17:58

thank youu! someone that finally doesn't have their head up their ass and makes a little sense

dinodannyrawr 5

Monday 11 July 2011 10:00

yo so fat that u need cheat codes for will fit... heheheheh

davidisbeast 12

Monday 11 July 2011 21:25

that's messed up u dick

RandomChickXD 0

Monday 11 July 2011 22:05

yeah wii fit does shit for weight loss anyways

jacksonclarke 0

Monday 11 July 2011 10:12

"don't worry. that's not drugs. I'm just a fatarse..."?

ryanst 7

Monday 11 July 2011 10:16

Is it wrong that I read this with an Asian accent?

hellokeroppi 5

Monday 11 July 2011 10:26

I'm sorry;/

cbz88 0

Monday 11 July 2011 10:33

you didn't know how to tell him it was one of your fat rolls? it's not something I would have imaged to be too hard...wouldn't you just say, "that!? that's one of my fat rolls". lol

pink_raindrops 26

Sunday 17 July 2011 3:56

Yeah, loud and proud. Lol

SGT_DBL 15

Monday 11 July 2011 10:53

On the one hand airport security is totally out of control these days. You pretty much have to agree to be sexually assaulted on national TV just to get on an airplane these days. On the other hand, NO FAT CHICKS. YDI.

kittyistwix 2

Monday 11 July 2011 10:56

whenever someone calls you fat, just look at them and say: " when you are willing to pay to get me liphosuctioned THEN you can complain" :D xD

SGT_DBL 15

Monday 11 July 2011 11:07

"I won't pay for an expensive surgery you don't need, but I will contribute a few bucks to a gym membership if you agree to pay for the rest by cutting back on the triple whoppers with cheese."