Health: Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like...

By Rachal - 30/01/2012 01:27 - United States

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 772

You deserved it 10 919

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Same thing different taste

10 out 10 for execution

By Anonymous - 30/08/2020 13:01 - Australia - Liverpool

Today, I had to squat to retrieve something from the bottom of the cabinet in the bathroom. This caused me to fart and startle myself enough that I jumped and banged my forehead on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 255

You deserved it 608

By Malpal - 23/01/2009 11:03 - United States

Today, I tried jumping off my bed over the footboard. I tripped and broke a full length mirror with my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 543

You deserved it 29 628

By vegantreegirl - 04/02/2019 20:00

Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 486

You deserved it 335

By hedayk - 15/05/2015 20:26 - United States - Bronx

Today, I woke up so hungover that when I went to the bathroom and caught sight of myself in the mirror, I screamed, slipped backwards, and smashed my head against the rim of my bathtub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 272

You deserved it 12 023

By Anonymous - 08/06/2014 02:34 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I went to the restroom to pee. A loud fart exploded out of my ass and echoed in the toilet bowl. I could practically feel my face on fire when I saw the horrified look on a little girl's face as I walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 077

You deserved it 6 687

WHO ARE YOU?

By Anonymous - 05/01/2020 03:00

Today, I was on the toilet and jumped when I saw a face at the window. It was my own reflection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 462

You deserved it 779

Cool moves

By UUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHH - 09/11/2022 22:00

Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 185

By igotsbadluck - 17/07/2013 21:44 - United States - Smyrna

Today, while walking into a hotel room, I passed by a full-sized mirror. My reflection scared me so badly that I punched the mirror, which then shattered and resulted in several cuts to my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 060

You deserved it 41 993

By Anonymous - 13/04/2012 09:43 - Canada

Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck. Someone kneed me in the butt, I fell face first and broke my glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 790

You deserved it 4 274

Bad start to the day

By Concussed - 17/01/2010 06:22 - Australia

Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 731

You deserved it 6 071

dumboears 8

Monday 30 January 2012 9:01

That's one hell of a fart.

LaColombianita 26

Monday 30 January 2012 9:02

I didn't know a fart could cause that much damage...

Comments

BeaterOfTheDrums 15

Monday 30 January 2012 9:17

At least you didn't try to push the fart out to make it louder, and end up with a hernia..

lrgenesis 19

Monday 30 January 2012 9:19

Where did it say op didn't?

steviesnm 6

Monday 30 January 2012 17:21

It seems to me that you speak from experience.

jacob4592 0

Monday 30 January 2012 9:23

Do you know what being stabbed in the butt feels like?????????

tanneriscool 2

Monday 30 January 2012 9:54

I'm sure you do.. Explain please.

CrzyMnky 0

Saturday 10 March 2012 0:40

That's actually a real good question. What IS it like to be stabbed in the ass?????

bittersweet25 3

Monday 30 January 2012 9:30

That sounds like a painful fart if it felt like someone stabbed you in the butt haha

wriptidez 0

Monday 30 January 2012 9:31

its a sharp pain up ypur anus

pandakota 0

Monday 30 January 2012 9:56

That'll knock the wind out of ya! :)

Michael87Jackson_fml 10

Monday 30 January 2012 9:56

How does a fart scare you that much? Thank you for the actual laugh though. xD Lmfao

somestupiduserna 0

Monday 30 January 2012 9:57

the feeling that you described usually comes from patients with chronic constipation. Because their severely scratched colon hurts even when air passes through.