Health: Today, I was suntanning outside, when I had a bout of nausea....

By rainbows? more like shitstorms - 17/08/2012 00:22 - United States

Today, I was suntanning outside, when I had a bout of nausea. I rushed to the toilet, hoping at all costs to just dry-heave it away. When I lifted the lid, I was faced with two of the most rancid floaters I've ever seen, courtesy of my live-in gran. Well, my stomach's empty now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 764

You deserved it 2 062

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 31/10/2009 19:40 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 779

You deserved it 6 760

By VMV - 01/02/2013 23:53 - Spain - Abrera

Today, I desperately needed to pee, so I decided to confront my anxiety issues and use a public toilet. I opened the lid, only to see several huge, rancid floaters staring back at me. I had an attack, started sobbing, and pissed myself on the way home. Never again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 175

You deserved it 9 432

By Michelle - 09/01/2010 16:11 - United States

Today, I woke up feeling extremely nauseous. When I started to feel better, I felt like I needed to spit. I went into the bathroom and opened the toilet to see someone had taken a giant crap the night before and forgotten to flush. The smell made me vomit all over my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 685

You deserved it 3 445

Last splash

By sicktomystomach - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, during lunch at school, a wave of nausea came over me. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in time. As I was throwing up, I set off the toilet's automatic flush and my vomit came flying back into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 182

You deserved it 5 286

Cringe

By mikesok988 - 07/05/2009 07:40 - United States

Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 485

You deserved it 4 813

Sorry, little dude

By dire-rear - 16/01/2010 20:19 - Singapore

Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 103

You deserved it 3 659

By hnickell93 - 09/10/2012 01:55 - United States - Visalia

Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 747

You deserved it 5 408

By Preggo - 10/12/2016 01:51

Today, I vomited so hard into the toilet that the water splashed back into my face. I instinctually moved away only to finish puking on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 608

You deserved it 860

By Rayvyn - 21/10/2009 16:40 - United States

Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 885

You deserved it 7 374

Splat!

By Anonymous - 02/07/2022 14:00

Today, because I have an inner ear problem which gives me major vertigo and nausea, I spontaneously projectile vomited all over my bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 806

You deserved it 89

SarcasticUnicorn 9

Friday 17 August 2012 5:15

I hate it when people don't flush. Age shouldn't matter because we were all supposed to be taught since a very young age.

CastielJ 6

Friday 17 August 2012 5:14

lol I thought of Skittles when I read your name..

Comments

Dogluvr1197 30

Friday 17 August 2012 5:47

I would have just waited for the nausea to pass outside. At least if you did vomit, you wouldn't have to clean it up if it were in some bushes.

ambylyn2010 3

Friday 17 August 2012 5:49

That is so gross!!

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Friday 17 August 2012 5:51

Flush and kill two birds with one stone.

ebonyirony 29

Friday 17 August 2012 6:10

I've had a cough for two months and it makes me puke everyday. Sucks for us eh

asherm 15

Friday 17 August 2012 6:35

Should get checked for whooping cough if you have no other cold symptoms or other known illness (allergies, smokers cough, etc). I've had it, seems to be on the rise again. Coughing until vomiting can be a symptom.

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Friday 17 August 2012 18:27

If you don't get that checked out, your esophagus and teeth are going to suffer. As with the lining of your stomach.

ebonyirony 29

Friday 17 August 2012 23:16

Lol I've been!! I've taken zpacks and nasal sprays. You think I'm stupid? Haha it's allergies at its worst.

olpally 32

Friday 17 August 2012 6:21

What the ****??? *goes to bathroom and barfs* after reading this FML.. **** all our lives for having to read this fml.. D:

mxpklx 12

Friday 17 August 2012 6:26

I think my stomachs going to be empty now...

mmmmIdiots 5

Friday 17 August 2012 6:29

Ohh poor OP that's just nasty!!!

perdix 29

Friday 17 August 2012 6:30

I don't think you can dry-heave when there is food in your stomach. I find dry-heaving more painful than puking anyways. Perhaps you have dry-heaving and dry-humping confused?