Miscellaneous: Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned...

By scaredshitless - 07/08/2009 04:11 - United States

Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 369

You deserved it 65 407

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By random - 29/04/2013 21:11 - Canada

Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 208

You deserved it 64 769

By Sack - 10/11/2011 11:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I sat on the toilet and fell off as the broken toilet seat slid off. As I fell, I grabbed the light cord in an effort to stop myself, and pulled it out of the ceiling. Now I can't use the toilet, and have to shower in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 435

You deserved it 6 072

Socially awkward

By Anonymous - 07/07/2024 14:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I was at a friend’s party when I needed to use the restroom. I walked into a closet and couldn’t find my way out in the dark. I ended up knocking over several items before someone heard the commotion and rescued me. I think someone recorded the whole thing so I'm afraid it gets posted it onto social media. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 369

By Mel - 07/05/2011 22:27 - United States

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 966

You deserved it 12 961

It's just windy

By m…… - 05/08/2012 00:44 - United States - South Whitley

Today, my mom's intense fear of tornadoes caused her to break into the bathroom, drag me off the toilet while I was changing my tampon, and drag me to the basement with my pants around my ankles to join my father, brother, and my brother's best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 268

You deserved it 2 014

By Gina - 02/04/2010 11:33 - Thailand

Today, I was in the shops and the lights all of a sudden went out. I got really scared for no reason because it was pitch black and grabbed onto my mum's hand. When the light's got turned on I was holding on to a random guy's hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 358

You deserved it 9 605

By shelbylove115 - 22/02/2013 05:35 - United States - Nevada City

Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 615

You deserved it 35 190

Fire hasard

By Anonymous - 26/12/2015 18:23 - United States - Ridge

Today, I had to take my son to the ER after he badly messed up trying to light his farts on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 634

You deserved it 3 066

By thanksbro - 28/09/2009 00:10 - United States

Today, I came home from school and ran to the nearest bathroom to go #2. In my hurry, I forgot to shut the door so I asked my older brother who was walking by to close it for me. After a while he didn't respond, so I looked up to see not my brother, but his best friend watching me take a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 844

You deserved it 20 580

Stealthy roommate

By AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA - 15/03/2023 00:00 - United States

Today, I had to go to the bathroom, but the door was closed. I waited until I was pretty much about to explode, and eventually yelled, "Are you okay?" and my roommate replied, "What are you talking about? Oh, sorry. I left the light on." How do you close the door and forget to turn off the light? FML

I agree, your life sucks 633

You deserved it 377

IreadFMLnaked 0

Friday 7 August 2009 12:06

This is pretty good blackmail material. Better be nice to your bro.

lolzRaptor 1

Friday 7 August 2009 12:09

If it was a very serious shit, you would have not taken your mind off of such a serious excrement, therefore there would be no crying and no FML, so it obviously wasn't a serious shit, just a normal one.

Comments

lilsurfergrlsp 3

Friday 7 August 2009 14:31

don't worry, i'm terrified of the dark too :)

Xeph 0

Friday 7 August 2009 14:49

this is too funny

MissArthur16 0

Friday 7 August 2009 14:50

Lol, agreed with #1.... be very very nice to your brother.

diabetic_rage 0

Friday 7 August 2009 14:56

wow dude you fail pretty hard. YDI.

plexico 3

Friday 7 August 2009 15:00

Who else is rooting for a power outage at his next night football game? When the power comes back, I can see the OP curled up in the fetal position on the 50-yard-line. The other team might forfeit due to uncontrollable laughter and your school will end the football program the next day out of shame. They might even change the school's name! See a shrink, dude! We have a lot of power outages here in Texas and eventually you might have a wife and kids (even though that often requires functioning testicles), and they won't find it at all charming, cute or pitiful that Dad is a sniveling coward in the dark. Man up!