Intimacy: Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. We were getting...

By Nat - 13/09/2014 06:29 - United States - Frisco

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. We were getting into the mood so I tried to eat the popcorn kind of sexually, causing me to choke on the popcorn and throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 511

You deserved it 18 699

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Same thing different taste

Scary

By xHoho - 26/11/2013 05:50 - United States - West Fargo

Today, I took my girlfriend to a scary movie, hoping I could comfort her at a scary part. Instead when a scary part came on, she reacted by throwing up all over my lap and the person in front of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 323

You deserved it 8 727

By Anonymous - 26/10/2012 21:59 - Switzerland - Zurich

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 994

You deserved it 3 816

By anonymous - 17/12/2011 02:06 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my friends. All throughout, some guy kept making weird sounds and breathing deeply. Midway through the movie, he got even louder. Just as I was about to snap, chunks of vomit sprayed over my chair and shoulders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 031

You deserved it 2 528

The Taste of Love

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 491

You deserved it 318

By Toomuchisoutofcontrol - 21/01/2017 08:00

Today, I was going down on my boyfriend. I'm usually in control and do my own thing. He tried taking control and I ended throwing up on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 586

You deserved it 1 010

By Anonymous - 11/07/2013 17:08 - United States - Fresno

Today, I was eating a corndog, when my boyfriend jokingly told me to "take it deeper". I did, and ended up choking and throwing up all over the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 704

You deserved it 54 235

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 091

You deserved it 40 034

Barf

By Danielle - 25/10/2020 11:02

Today, I threw up during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 198

You deserved it 189

Seduction technique

By BlueBirdWings - 06/03/2012 07:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 786

You deserved it 6 802

By SMS123 - 25/06/2010 19:42 - United States

Today, I was eating lunch with my boyfriend when I started choking. My boyfriend took it as an opportunity to sneak food off my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 478

You deserved it 4 789

Nederlander95 14

Saturday 13 September 2014 16:12

If you puke from popcorn I'm terrified of what happens when you go down on him

Cheezits4dayz 14

Saturday 13 September 2014 16:19

Mmmm yeah... does this turn you o- BLEAAAUUGH

Comments

Nyx7 24

Saturday 13 September 2014 18:39

I seriously want to know how you eat popcorn seductively...

Cass_x 22

Saturday 13 September 2014 18:50

Why did you even think about eating popcorn while you were getting in the mood? I surely wouldn't.. But maybe that's just me..

awkwardmess 26

Saturday 13 September 2014 18:56

how does one sexually eat popcorn?

Khaleesi_26 30

Saturday 13 September 2014 19:11

Well it could have been worse. You could have thrown up on him... Not that thos helps haha

JRtheSnowman 5

Saturday 13 September 2014 19:39

That sucks, points for trying

archertheo 15

Saturday 13 September 2014 19:47

I agree that is sexy!

Auromo 14

Saturday 13 September 2014 19:49

better go back to Mike and Ike's

ThunderTheRad 14

Saturday 13 September 2014 20:03

*shrug*

trendkilla254 4

Saturday 13 September 2014 20:17

I'm too sexy for this corn. too sexy for this corn. too sexy for this popcoOOoorrrrn.

jeriaslovesyou 16

Saturday 13 September 2014 20:18

Did that get him right in the mood?

Keywords

Miscellaneous Awkward Racism Love Money My ex Harassment Work Embarrassing Accident AITA Am I overreacting? Religion Relatable Health Gifts LGBTQIA+ Annoying Inappropriate Teachers Education Animals Dogs Relationship advice Cats Cute Transportation Friends Cars Scams

The Top

Today, I found out that I have a bacteria causing me to smell bad. For the last three years, strangers would say that I stink, I thought it was because I'm a smoker and they could smell cigarettes from my clothes, only to find out that people could smell my vagina through my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 279

Today, I was at a food truck festival and I spotted a taco truck and eagerly ordered a spicy taco. As I took my first bite, the spice hit me like a freight train and I began to choke. In an effort to save myself, I dropped the taco into the lap of the guy sitting next to me. He looked up, lap splattered in salsa, and asked if I was having a stroke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91

You deserved it 480

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 433

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I agree, your life sucks 39 171

You deserved it 5 816

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I agree, your life sucks 37 850

You deserved it 3 316

Today, my dad got dressed up in formal clothes, and I asked what the occasion was. He said he had a hot date, which would've been fine if he hadn't told me what was "on the menu", namely "wining, dining, sixty-nining". Thanks for that image. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 765

You deserved it 2 191

Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 212

You deserved it 8 281

Today, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't stop looking at my phone while working. I work in the back room, and there is no clock in there. I look at my phone to check the time. That way I know how long I have left in that hellhole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 565

You deserved it 7 288