By firsttimer69 - 20/03/2009 06:11 - Canada

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML
I agree, your life sucks 151 728
You deserved it 15 193
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

jam26 0

are you sure he wasn't a virgin? I know most guys finish in like 2 seconds their first time. maybe he lied to you and he was a virgin too

195 2
amirn86 0

Hey, at least you know you turn him on A LOT This really never happens you can take my word I want to apologize that's just absurd Mainly you're at fault for the way that you dance and now I **** IN MY PANTS Don't tell your friends or I'll say you're a **** Plus it's your fault, you were rubbing my butt I'm very sensitive, some would say that's a plus Now I'll go home and change I **** right in my pants every time you're next to me And when we're holding hands it's like having sex to me You say I'm premature, I just call it ecstasy I wear a rubber at all times cause it's a necessity Cause I **** in my pants

150 11

Comments

Deadly_Punk 0

Well...that blows or maybe you should have :P rofl jkz jkz

0 0
drimpossible 0

#98: Nuh-huh! After we were done, it took me about 30 minutes to convince her it was my first time. It appears I was great. Of course, up to that time I had had a lot of time to plan what I would do if I ever got laid.

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Ashes_03 0

Lol... I think the funniest thing about my first time (boyfriend wasn't a virgin) was that we couldn't quite... get things to work... (ie. he couldn't find the hole). XDDDDD We ended up collapsing in fits of laughter because he had been pouting that his penis was becoming discouraged when I teased that it was my first time and I was eager to know his excuse :P You have to be able to laugh at yourself and each other ESPECIALLY during sex. It's supposed to be a playful thing not some serious affair where you give your poor guy performance anxiety. (For any at all curious how my story ends, after about a half hour of flailing around we happily went at it for about two hours :P I had a rather enjoyable first time. Yay me!... But then again, the sex is always good with my lovey). Go easy on him. He was probably really embarrassed over that... It's not all about the sex you know.

1 0
Kellayy 0

Wow.. that's all I gots ta say.. wow. FYL.

1 0
EGG_fml 0

sometimes that just happens

0 0
ShadowDXDragon 0

Wow, some guys just dont know you please the woman first before yourself.

0 0
ashleeyanne 0

omg, that really sucks. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, thirty seconds for your first time. poooooor thing.

0 0
andiexpandie 0

ugh, my ex was like this. i just told him to jerk off before we hung out. some guys just suck...vibrators do the job pretty well though!

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reefers 0

he probly was a virgin.. tht happend to me the first time i had sex with my bf he finished in less than a minute when he told me that he wasnt a virgin he later admitted he was a virgin and didnt wanna come clean after lying to me while we were talking. he came clean like about 8mnths later. fml ..we're still together after four yrs so not really fml

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